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June 29, 2008

IS THAT A VAULTING POLE IN YOUR POCKET?

(Thanks to sjhaller)

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Hopefully this won't spill over to the canditates and have an influence on the erection.

Well it'll at least be easy to test for, though not so easy of the female-type atheletes.

Could be a problem for hurdlers.

And male gymnasts. (vault)(ouch)

Russian male gymnasts are introducing a new landing this year - the 'tripod.'

*Snork at Annie, despite the fact that she read my mind*

News report: "The Jamaican won the 100m dash by a, ahem, head"

Ah Sio. Thanks for that graphic illustration. Yes you may have a point there.

Joe Buck talked about this the other night on Letterman. He said (1) those using it will be easy to spot; and (b) there will probably be fewer base runners sliding head-first slide into second base.

*Experts are divided over whether it actually offers athletes an edge.*

An extraordinary number of Rock Hard Ten performances is the cause for the experts calling the heads up.

An increase to bloodflow to the apparatus (penis if your educated enough) increases batting average as well as achievable height?

I don't think the catchers could use it. How would the pitcher know what pitch the catcher's calling for?
Does he want me to throw a fast ball or is he just happy to see me?

Dwight's Stone has been ressurected.

*Swings and misses*

Joe Buck: "Srike two!"

*appeals to the 3rd base umpire* Looks like he held his schwing.

This just in. A pill to increase blood fow to the brain has been invented. Immediate distribution has been initiated to every resident of Massecheuttes.

So Rusty Staub is considering a comeback?

Dick Howser is banned from attending MLB functions for life.

Stan the Man's biography is relegated to the comedy genre.

Let's play two!

Then I guess the 'Big Unit' won't be retiring any time soon.

Johnny Dickshot played for the Pirates? Figures. I had the malignant opportunity to hear the Pittsburg announcers call a game the other night. Most ignorant couple of talking heads I've ever heard in my life.

Now JD should have gone before the judge and asked for a legal name change. I know one question the judge would not ask in making a determination.

"What is need or reason for you request!"

More likely scenario.

judge: "bwahahahahahahahahaha!"

IS THAT A VAULTING POLE IN YOUR POCKET?

Of course not, Dave. I'm just happy to see you!

(Seriously - 25 posts in 3 hours and 15 minutes, and I'm the first one to say that? Y'all are really lagging, even for a Sunday!) ;-)

Perhaps, lil, but I bet JD could really hit an inside slider.

This is only speculation by a male, but I'm guessing the women at the Olympics will not be too impressed with even quicker finishing times.

HE: Yes!!! A new record!
SHE: Well thanks for not much.

I see a new ad campaign coming: Suffering from Pollution? Viagra is the solution!

I think they'll hve to make new rules to cover the fencers using two swords.

Alternate Headline:

Olympic Committee to Take Long Hard Look at Viagra in Olympians

Freestyle in the pool - outboard motor?

Freestyle, yes. Rudderless, no.

This could give new meaning to the phrase "stiff competition".

"Still, some preliminary studies have shown that cyclists taking Viagra improved their performances by up to 40 percent."

Well, cyclists do go faster if they're forced to stand up as they pedal instead of sitting on them narrow little seats.

Other than that, as a former competitive swimmer I'd say Viagra would have been something fun to slip into my teammate's Gatorade after he made fun of my Speedo.

"stiff competition" LOL

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