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Contributing to this blog:
- "Dave" is Dave Barry, who is a humor columnist and presidential contender.
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- "Dave" is Dave Barry, who is a humor columnist and presidential contender.
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Key quote: "Mr. Espinal was taken to an area hospital, where he was treated and released with non-life-threatening injuries."
Must have shot himself in the head, then?
Posted by: klezmerphan | May 13, 2008 at 06:48 PM
But did it rid him of the itch?
Posted by: Doc Rick | May 13, 2008 at 06:49 PM
And not suprisingly, alcohol WAS involved.
Posted by: Elon Weintraub | May 13, 2008 at 06:54 PM
He needed, but evidently did not have, the bear necessities.
Posted by: Cat R | May 13, 2008 at 06:55 PM
Oye, Jorge, scratch your b@lls.
Posted by: CJrun | May 13, 2008 at 06:57 PM
This is when it pays to have a very long, sturdy oosik.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | May 13, 2008 at 07:01 PM
it had all of the necessary elements:
beer
gambling
3am
texas
Posted by: packsaddle | May 13, 2008 at 07:02 PM
Actually, you could have swapped all of Texas for Miami and it'd turn out the same way. Which is kinda sad if you think about it.
Posted by: Doc Rick | May 13, 2008 at 07:05 PM
Did he miss his espinal column?
Posted by: Danny | May 13, 2008 at 07:13 PM
Yes, but he nailed Tex'ass.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | May 13, 2008 at 07:14 PM
bwahahahaha
Posted by: CJrun | May 13, 2008 at 07:17 PM
"Mr. Espinal went back and told his buddies that he shot himself. 'They didn’t believe him until they saw the blood coming down his back,' Lt. Dean said."
The sound of the gun going off didn't, umm, give his claim some verisimilitude? Must have been a whole lot of alcohol involved.
Posted by: Danny | May 13, 2008 at 07:20 PM
1 snork for annie.
Posted by: Snork Patrol | May 13, 2008 at 07:23 PM
Danny, I've been to a lot of late night poker games with beer involved in Texas and to be honest they probably thought it Mr. Espinal repatriating the 3 bean and cheese burritos from Taco Bell he'd had an hour earlier.
Posted by: Doc Rick | May 13, 2008 at 07:24 PM
*adds a "was" between "it" and "Mr."*
Posted by: Doc Rick | May 13, 2008 at 07:25 PM
Doc translation - his buddies though he farted.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | May 13, 2008 at 07:28 PM
Understanding, those buddies. They stuck with him, though he farted.
Posted by: CJrun | May 13, 2008 at 07:32 PM
I was going with something a little more disgusting Annie, but I'll buy your version of events.
Posted by: Doc Rick | May 13, 2008 at 07:33 PM
Sheesh - with friends like youse, who needs enemas?
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | May 13, 2008 at 07:36 PM
And yes, I'm talking about Doc and CJ as well as the buddies in the story.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | May 13, 2008 at 07:39 PM
Plus, add 1 *snork* for Danny.
Posted by: CJrun | May 13, 2008 at 07:41 PM
Annie, these guys might. That one guy sure looked like he was straining a bit.
Posted by: Cat R | May 13, 2008 at 07:42 PM
Hey, in my case we'd warned the guy. You can lead a drunk guy away from Taco Hell, but if he wants to punish himself there's not much you can do.
Posted by: Doc Rick | May 13, 2008 at 07:44 PM
I love these kinds of stories. They make me giggle.
Posted by: Eleanor | May 13, 2008 at 07:47 PM
Stop that giggling this instant!
Posted by: CJrun | May 13, 2008 at 07:55 PM
Note to self: Avoid that guy this summer.
Posted by: Elon Weintraub | May 13, 2008 at 08:26 PM
After the itchy back incident, Mr. Espinal declined to complain about his itchy ear. The backscratcher has been confiscated.
Posted by: eilbeback | May 14, 2008 at 08:01 AM
Okay, LOL!
Posted by: Margaritaville | May 14, 2008 at 09:31 AM