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April 25, 2008

THE CELLIST HITS A WRONG NOTE, AND MILLISECONDS LATER HIS HEAD IS VAPORIZED BY A LASER

Robot to Conduct Detroit Symphony Orchestra
Robot
(Thanks to sjhaller)

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That would be one way to handle the trombone section as well..

(What's the difference between a dead squirrel in the road and a dead trombonist?......The squirrel could have been on his way to a gig!)

I was in a big classical choir for about 10 years and I can assure you a good human choral director can vaporize an off-key soprano at 100 paces with NO mechanical assistance.

"Maestro, can you just give me a minute to adjust my embouchure?"

"I'm sorry, Dave, I can't do that..."

We will never learn . . .

BRAVO, R2!

Here in the Detroit area we're all pretty excited that the orchestra has signed Leonard Slatkin as their new conductor. He's one of the true masters of the baton, even though I have to admit I don't share his penchant for 20th century American composers; still, even speaking as one who grew up with the orchestra under Paul Paray and collected all his records, I really think if the orchestra and Slatkin get along anywhere as comfortably as they did under Neeme Jarvi, there should be good times ahead. It would be great if the orchestra could once again enjoy the prestige of a contract with a major record label as they did with Paray and Jarvi, because among record company professionals Leonard Slatkin is a proven money-maker and that unfortunately is all some of them care about...

Someday the robots will rise up and turn on us and eat our brains.

IT'S NOT CONDUCTING THE #$%&*! ORCHESTRA, THE (HUMAN) PROGRAMMER IS USING IT TO CONDUCT THE ORCHESTRA BY REMOTE CONTROL.

Sheesh. Shoddy reporting.

Do we need to get an ASBO for ASIMO?

Viola players might actually practice prior to the performance after a couple of cellists vaporize.

Probably not, though.

BLASPHEMY! A HONDA robot in Detroit??? Heads will roll!

I've never met a conductor with a heart anyway, so...

"ASIMO can walk, even jog, wave, avoid obstacles and carry on simple conversations."

Dave, watch out. Sounds like a formidable opponent in the race to be President, Yes, of the United States.


Oh. And I can't even get my Roomba to stop spinning in circles backwards, so I am duly impressed. They do say that early musical training builds brains. That explains it. I just had the little guy sweeping floors in his formative years.

Please put down your cello. You have 20 seconds to comply.

Assy Moe WBAGNFARB

Doesn't anyone else see the "Lego man" here?

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