A PLEA FROM SEATTLE
I am from Seattle, WA, and am getting married in November. My fiancee is from St. Petersburg, FL, and we are getting hitched in Sarasota. Yesterday, for Easter dinner, my dad's family came over. I was talking with my Aunt Shelly, and asked her if she is coming to the wedding. She said (and I am not joking) "I don't want to go to Florida because Dave Barry makes fun of it so much." I asked her if she would make it if Dave Barry wrote a column or blog about how great Florida is. She said she would.
So give me a hand. I am a big fan, after all. I love your books, columns, blogs, and my new Dave Barry joke-a-day square toilet paper. I love my Aunt Shelly, and I want her at my wedding. It is a good prompt, too. A column on how good Florida is. Should be easy.
Dear Paul --
Tell Aunt Shelly she has absolutely nothing to worry about. Sarasota is in a very quiet, safe part of Florida, completely out of rifle range from Miami. It's a wealthy community with basically no crime, except for the occasional arrest for servant-flogging (a misdemeanor). So there should be no problem, as long as you are not so foolish as to hold your wedding during hurricane season (June through the following June).
p.s. I invite the blog commenters to add reasons why Aunt Shelly will enjoy Florida.