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February 23, 2008

MR. SNAIL'S NEXT BIG IDEA

Don't pay PLAYERS, pay FANS.

(Thanks to Evan, who told the s.b. about it in a blogger meeting)

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ummmm....got nothin'

The presence of Manatees will result in a "No Wake" zone, but that may be appropriate for Marlins games.

Somebody once asked (in an oldish comic strip) why there weren't cheerleaders at baseball games.

The answer: Because the stuff they throw from the stands is distracting enough.

It's an ingenious plot to sicken the opponents. Or at least to discourage the Pats from taping anything at Marlins games.

This is a brilliant way to increase the take from concessions. Everyone will be fleeing from their seats and end up tempted by the overpriced food/beverages/thotchkes. These men may very well be worth their weight in gold when all is said and done.

I can find plenty of big bellies in Houston to make up a local squad for the Astros. However, after considering the way they played last year, just attending a game might exceed a person's maximum daily exposure level to ugly.

Maybe the Manatees will inspire South Floridians to shed a few pounds.

Fat chance.

Couldn't help that pun, eh???

(Thanks to Evan, who told the s.b. about it in a blogger meeting)

We have BLOGGER MEETINGS???

Why have I not been informed of such events??

Machetes have a way of putting people off, Siouxie.

*smacks Texgal in the back of the head* What are you doing? Don't give Annie anymore ammunition than she already has...even if it's true.

Sorry Doc. We're still living down our "fattest large city in America" stigma from 5 or 6 years ago. Believe me, when we belly up to the bar, drinks go flying across the room.

Is "Beached Whale Rescued..." a related story?

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