CAPTION CONTEST

Drop whatever you are doing and come up with a caption for this photo:

(The photo comes from this site. Yes! The Flowbee lives!)

The person who submits the winning caption, as determined by our panel of distinguished judges, will receive a valuable prize that judi will think of once she realizes what I have done here.

Update: judi has come up with some really lame excellent prize candidates, which she will describe here when she gets around to it. We will announce the winner tomorrow, and he or she can pick the prize.

Prize Update (Winner will be forced to accept choose one of the following):

1) A geniune Fiesta Bowl "yard o' beer" (beer not included) once worn by Bob the Bear

2) Two packs of "24" JOLT gum which has not been chewed by anyone

3) A DVD of Barry Manilow's "Music and Passion" PBS special

4) A small stuffed weinermobile

5) The Big Book o' Beer

Comments

[subversive_knitter]

But the most important part of any project is shop safety. Remember to read, understand, and follow the instructions on all your power tools but remember, the Chinese may hate you.

[tomg]

Do you think too much? Tried of thinking all of the time? Then the all new, hand operated, brain sucker is for you. It will suck out your brains right through the top of your head. It's guaranteed to at least make you look stupid, or your money back.

[Meanie the Blue]

When the professor asked the class to answer off the top of their heads, he got quite a range of responses.

[Tony Field]

Despite his considerable research into foreign courtship displays, Randal's success with Swedish women was poor.

[CJrun]

MtB 8:04 *snork*!

[WayneHere]

Ten seconds ago I had an unsightly unibrow.

[igloo]

The tragic and untimely end of Mr. Wizard.

[Alfred]

After wiring his brain very carefully, Ted was ready to see what he truly thought of Radishes.

Some people forget the other steps to the Rain Dance

If he begins to speak in 1s and 0s.....

Sarah Conner realized the machines had run out of money

Brought back from the dead... Tvice...Curly could never truly regain his abilities.

And if you order now, Steve will not die!!

If he pulls a Hare out of his head, I will be amazed.

Attempting to teach Llamas self grooming does have its problems.

He who pulls the vacuum from His head shall be named King.

He was looking for a gun, but his eyesight wasn't that great.

They won't laugh at my MR. T Mohawk!!!

Larry really didn't want to go to the ball with his wife.

When they discover that he is actually a zombie controlled by a maniacal duck, all will be lost

I presume alcohol was involved.

Some people need help with sand blasters.

He does a decent job, and we pay him in carrots.

If I had a dollar for every time a guy was told by his agent to shave his head with a rotorooter, I would be disgustingly rich.

Most Mormons know how to hide the horns correctly.

Bush Clinton Clinton Bush Bush can make anyone go mad.

"I enjoy my ears freshly cut before cooked" said Hanibal at the Canibal restaurant.

"Hey, you know what would taste great? Hair!"

You put the brain sucker in, you take the brain sucker out, you do the hokey pokey and shake it all about....

This is about the point where Ahnold makes a witty remark.

Why do I have the distinct feeling that this guy is connected to internet porn with his brain device?

Zombies: If you can't beat them, Join Them

Congress: If you can't beat them, Join Them.

See he was tooling around in his car when he thought, "Hey, Why can't I do this stuff with myself!"

We can rebuild him, faster, stronger, smarter, and with a wicked mustache!

In Arabic cultures, an unshaven man is considered a cheat. In American cultures a man with a stache is a porn star.

Out of curiosity, why don't we have some picture labeling device for this?

His wife sells Am Way!

His college graduate son just moved back into the house because of the job market.

He now cleans the sinks at a local pool.

I like my haircut... Jenny.

In the 90s version he has black hair and an evil look in his eyes.

Some super powers are best not talked about.

I like my hairgel. It's Cement!!

And then the ninja flipped out and killed them All!!

[Ole]

I want a BLOWdryer, but this one SUCKS.

[Meanie the Blue]

Dr. Frankenstein IV took enormous pride in the advances he was able to make on his great-grandfather's achievements.

[Tony Field]

(Voice from the side): "Sir, do you have any other qualifications that might make you a suitable candidate for a job with the TSA?"

[Cheesewiz]

The Makers of the Lollipop Spinner Present:

The Auto-Pirouetter

[Morgana]

AWBH - I think you have a winner!

*Snork!*

My caption:
"I'm gonna win this staring contest!" or
"Honey where's the vacuum?"

[Rooster]

Watch this!

[Rooster]

Watch this!

[Tony Field]

(Voice from the side): "And after the break: more Dr Phil's People."

[Denny]

Your HMO provider proudly introduces our new post-operative home surgical staple remover. Available in your area now. (Psyciatric surgery now covered as any other illness.) (Please report insurance fraud.)

[Meanie the Blue]

More tequila?

[Stev0]

Have zombies coming over? Treat them to their favorite hors d'oeuvre with the Ronco Brain Shooter!

[igloo]

Famous last photo of Professor Fleebilwoofer demonstrating his celebrated "Mini Blackhole Constructor".

[Recovering 24 Addict]

Hi I am Randy Johnson and after signing with the Yankees this is the 2nd stupidest thing I have done.

[Meditrina]

"He likes it. Hey, Mikey!"

[WayneHere]

...and after the break... the Brazilian attachment.

[Meanie the Blue]

Ron realized that it wasn't the perfect icebreaker, but he just couldn't let her get away.

[Steve (The 24 Guy)]

Jack remained calm, but even the Flowbee couldn't release the squirrel's grip on his head.

[Meditrina]

Is that a lunar eclipse?

Nah, it's just Jethro powercutting the lawn.

[Alfred]

The scientific break through discovered by studying slightly creepy guys hair was far more powerful then Stem Cells.

Well, at least he isn't trying to give himself an eye exam.

Lawrence just knew that Shiella would love to see his battle scar.

He had bragged at the bar over his war wounds, but no one could find them. They will this next time.

Wire Hangers! That's it Tommy, go and give yourself a hair cut!

For those who are wondering, I am trying to win by amount. One of them has to be funny.

I myself use inflatable men.

Pinochio never let on his deep dark secret of dry rot.

Cheers was filmed before a live studio audience.

And now time for stories by a brain dead man.

I'm sorry, your looking for Dr. Frankenstein in room 203. I'm just the professor of Anthropology.

Home made cures don't always end up working.

Old Wives tales told about men with a nice hole in the head are not true.

He has a soft spot for vacuums. The doctors say he will recover eventually.

And on the 8th day, God made Chuck!

I made a patch just perfect for the yamulka.

I want Donald Trump's Hair!

It's a brain sucker.... Starving!!

[Olo Baggins of Bywater]

Pete Weber once considered suicide, but decided on a career as a pro bowler instead.

[Meditrina]

But Wait! There's more! It slices. It dices. It chops.

[Moon]

The Flowbee is one of the greatest inventions of the late 20th Century.

[DeskDiva]

On this episode of VH1's Where Are They Now?: Happy Days' "Chuck" tells all.

[DeskDiva]

Ye canna change the laws o' physics, Captain!

[Texgal]

SNORK @ Meanie 8:36.

[igloo]

To receive your Florida Drivers License, go to the first empty cubicle and attach exam device to the top of your head; activate device; wait 5 minutes; turn of device. Your license will be mailed to you within 5 working days.

[DeskDiva]

Be careful in picking these, judi - there are some dupes in here!

[igloo]

dang machine sucked up the "f".

[DeskDiva]

igloo - (nice to see you!) I think you have a winner, there!

[igloo]

Ted Havenagaster test lastest in low flo technology.

[DeskDiva]

Gee, ig - you're on a roll! (No, I'm not buttering you up - even if you ask!)

[Doc Rick]

So this is what happened to the Taco Bell "Carne Asada" lion?

[Bãrön vønKlýff]

Dandruff Vacuum, Hair Cut, and utter humiliation, all at one low price

[DeArmondVI]

English Major (n):(1) A worthless degree; (1) a person who majored in English and can only find work modeling infomercial miracle products.

[Siouxie]

Yes, ladies...he IS single!

[igloo]

The Phone Police demonstrate latest in torture devices on Johnny Fever.

[Siouxie]

*currently waiting for Alfred's next multi-slogan post*

Let's give him a few more minutes... ;-P

[DeskDiva]

Oooh, SNAP, ig!! NICE one!

[SW]

Scalp on, scalp off. The Scalper.

[Steve (The 24 Guy)]

Users thought Microsoft's first attempt at an MP3 player was a bit awkward.

[Steve Haller]

Somehow I expected initiation into Phi Beta Kappa to be -- I don't know -- more *dignified*, you know ??

[SW]

All your follicles are belong to us.

[Doc Rick]

The process by which someone becomes a Dolphins or Marlins fan. *ducks yet again*

[Ford79]

With this arrangement I get all my local stations plus HBO!

[DeskDiva]

Steve H - I guess even PBK is into hazing these days.

[Om]

Got too much brains? Think too hard? The "Flow-bean" brain vacum sucks the extra beans out of your head so you can enjoy a more peaceful state of mind. As a bonus, we will add on -- at no cost -- the chakra sucker upper attachment, which will suck all of your chakras up through the big one (sahasrar) on top of your head! Operators will be standing by for the next half hour to take your order.

[SW]

Also doubles as a ping-pong game rigging device!

(I'm only halfway thru, but so far my voye goes to Wench Lizzy for the lifetime achievement award.)

[Steve (The 24 Guy)]

In retrospect, Bob realized that his user-controlled haircut website wasn't his best idea.

[Steve Haller]

Doc, it may well be the process by which someone becomes a Dolphin or Marlin...!

[Meanie the Blue]

Fighting global warming was finally given up as a lost cause in the early 21st century.

[Cat R.]

Snorking at SW's posts...

[ArcticAl]

And you thought your job sucked.

[Steve Haller]

Let's see that blowhard Oreck guy top *this* ... !

[Cat R.]

Look what I can do!

[peterpan]

Flowbee Flowbee Oww!!

[SW]

I'm Katie Couric. Do you like my hair?

(Thx, cat. Gettin' a late start).

[Tony Field]

Randal's knowledge of Ethiopian courtship rituals was impressive.

[Cat R.]

I am stuck on Flowbee, 'cause Flowbee's stuck on me

[Cat R.]

Can you hear me now?

[SW]

Lesson two: the plie.

[Steve Haller]

Can it beat an egg, O Chef of the Future?

[ha! let's see how many others on the geezer bus get *that* one ...!]

[Tony Field]

Randal's mastery of the secret recognition sign allowed him to pass un-noticed among the Freemasons.

[Cat R.]

Celebrate the Moments of Your Life.

[Meanie the Blue]

Of course it can beat a egg. Hah. Haaaahh.

[Cat R.]

Steve, I loves me my Art Carney!

[Miss Chevious]

"Even one handed men can use the Flowbee! Get yours today!"

Miss Chevious

[CJrun]

Things just got out of hand.

[Cat R.]

Flowbee. Don't leave home without it.

[Meanie the Blue]

In the end, Ron's search for a hangover cure proved unsuccessful.

[Steve Haller]

[followed by Gleason crashing into the prop wall...]

[SW]

"Are you talkin' to me?"

(caption to illustration number seven from Wilbert DeNiro's "Method Acting for Idiots")

[DeskDiva]

CJ - Who's pinchin' his tail?

[Steve Haller]

Cat, not one thing now on TV can match "Helloooo ball" ... !

[Cat R.]

Ace is the place with the helpful hardware man.

[Tony Field]

Randal's rendition of the Star Spangled Banner was long remembered at the Little League.

[Meanie the Blue]

Though he longed for Nadine with all his heart, Ron knew that getting her out of his head would be best for the both of them.

[SW]

Demonstration of new Florida voting mechine.

[Cat R.]

Steve -- true, true.

[peterpan]

*SNORK* @ Cat R. 9:52

[Cat R.]

Reach out and Flowbee someone.

[SW]

MAchine, dammit!! Ther goes my winning entry!

[SW]

MAchine, dammit!! There goes my winning entry!

[Tony Field]

Randal felt that his job interview at Idiots R Us went well.

[Cat R.]

We're number two. We try harder.

[peterpan]

Before he became a household name, Geraldo had a brief but unsuccessful stint at the local Chevron.

[DeskDiva]

A little dab'll do ya. LITTLE, dangit!!

[Cat R.]

Wouldn't you really rather have a Flowbee?

[SW]

Floobee a Flowbie!

(ok, i know that one has no chance)

[Alfred]

Rabbi Tuckman seemed confused at the entire procedure.

When she said, "Take it all off!" Harold followed her completely.

Lister, "You can't get a double Polaroid from a vacuum cleaner!"
"It was the Flowbee sir."

[Steve Haller]

Do you realize this is probably the first time ever that we've had to indicate the *time* of someone's post when responding?? I mean, it's getting to be a feeding frenzy around here ... !

Oh, right, the contest, uh, ahem -- how about this: "I'm not only a member of the Hair Vacuum Club, I'm also the President!"

[Cat R.]

Calgon, take me away.

[Alfred]

Quick, Look at the moon. Its Eclipsing.