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January 24, 2008

NAMES IN THE NEWS

Alan Johnson, the Health Secretary, and Ed Balls, the Secretary of State for Children

(Thanks to Beth Armogida)

Comments

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First Johnson

Dave,
First I hope, I could sure handle being paid to lose weight. Especially if I was paid well.

Pay me in Cheez-its and I'm there.

“The core of the problem is simple — we eat too much.."

newsflash, much???

*eats the cash carrot*

Nah. Not so tasty, that. I'll stick to the baby ones instead.

Does my wallet make my butt look big?

I see nothing funny about these names.

...Johnson and Balls - a match made in heaven.

I notice Mr. Balls sports program did not include Kickball.

harry, you never had a sense of humor did you?

Definite discrimination against the poor and skinny. Pay us to eat what they can't.

JEC666-what you say - us scrawny girls need shoe $ too.

Yipes! Roughly $2 for every man, woman, and child in the UK, just to advertise it, then another $10 each to pay the 'size-challenged' to eat less!

Gotta love gummint programs....

I want to hear the campaign ads when they run as a slate.

"This election Tuesday, vote for Johnson because he's got Balls. Ed Balls. BIG Ed Balls."

Grow up, you people!

Johnson & Balls. This is completely sexist.

I agree, sis!

Johnson anad Balls? Fine, upstanding community members.

*reaches around and grabs a little 'a'*

I cannot get excited about any of this.

hmm Phil...you ARE talented!

*wink*

maybe that should have been a *smooch*

*puckers lips*

Holy Transfats! Johnson and Balls, waging war against Obesity! And please don't forget your aerobic exercise.

The picture of the sperm kinda fits too, doesn't it?

Dick Swett is not amused.

Yeah, AV, that would have been me winking...

Not amused....

You people are sick.

This is just painful.

How come they alway show the egg as fat, and the sperm as svelte? That's not fair.

That's not how it should be done.

Jes, Anita!!

Doug, you need to put that behind you. No need to get testy!

We Pacific Islanders tend to be big, too.

Yvanna, call me.

Settle down! Don't make me come in there!

Yeah, give them shopping vouchers so they can go stock up and get fat again.

Come to my nudist colony!

Don't remind me, Kamana.

*sigh*

Oy, such perverseness!

Why don't I ever get invited to your house, Nookie???

I've been to that nudist colony.

Major Snorkage at all of you sick, twisted, entertaining pervs!

You really wanna get into it, Ieeni??

I really WANT to go into it, but I don't seem to get too far....*sigh*

*picks self up from floor*
You bizarre people are NOT helping my hiccups!
*goes to drink water while hanging upside-down in a bowl of sugar*

Do I know you, Leeni? Didn't we double with Mona Lott and Philip McCrevice?

Auntie M? BOO! Did that help? ;-)

PS - Auntie - you fit in a bowl of sugar?! Cool!

You hang upside down in a 'bowl of sugar' and WE'RE weird?

Ooooookey dokie.

Have we met, Ben?

I'm sure we've bumped into each other somewhere.

Is it getting hot in here or WHAT!??

I don't get it -

Nice work, Ben.

Why wasn't I notified of this meeting? Whom do I spank for this oversight?

Me! Me! Me!

Hey? how 'bout a little hand here, huh? It's getting harder and harder to cum up with these names.

snorks all around

(sees why this thread has 54 posts and the previous one 19)

Nobody will play with me.

I'll play with you, O ;-)

I'll get around to you when I'm done, OK?

Speaking of lonely.....

*TAKES FIREHOSE LOADED WITH PENICILLIN TO ENTIRE THREAD*


Move along, now, nuthin' to see here...

Oooh, niiiiice hose!

Sandi, sis...I feel your pain.

dave will be so proud when he slithers down this thread....

*starts to spank Anita, but wait...wait...wait...OH NOES!!!*

I'm done.

Why do you say that, Judi? After a short false start, we were just taking the high road and following blog policy ...

judi, we live to make you and Dave proud of us.

Meanie, I think we rose to the occasion.

Mom....who are all these new posters and what do their names mean????

Hey Jack --- whut? you don't have a two page typed list of alias names in your desk drawer? How many you want? I got clean ones...Barb Dwyer, Justin Time, Ophelia Pain (left over from Clinton), Anita Bath, Adam Baum, etc., etc. - PG rated: Eileen Dover (sister of Ben), Iona Bush, Dougie Style, Pat McGroyn, Betty Scruder, Mo Lester, etc., etc. ...down to the X-rated - Peter Gozinia, Craven Morehead, Dick Hertz, and the polish star, Pilez Jakmiov.

As far as Dave slithering down this thread, Judi -
Willie B. Long?

I sure hope not, Mary.

or maybe I do.

♫TWEEEEETTTTT♫
BY ORDER OF THE DADE COUNTY HEALTH DEPARTMENT THIS THREAD IS QUARANTINED!!
The Director, Pat A Dick, has declared a possible outbreak of innuendo, bad puns, and juvenile humor has broken out.
Stay tuned to your CONALRAD station for further updates.

*sets up a perimeter around this thread and advises all who cum here to detox in the Hallelujah thread*

-you know, this has happened to me before.

Mr Johnson said: “The core of the problem is simple — we eat too much and we do too little exercise. The solution is more complex.”

Mr Balls promised more sport and exercise in and out of school and more play and sports facilities.

Is is just me, or is it slightly ironic that they refer to these two as Mr. Johnson and Mr. Balls.

Seems a little too formal to me.
Doesn't seem right to objectify male anatomy in such a way.
I feel just like a piece of meat...

Is it just me...?

DANGIT. A typo almost ruined that joke too.
Thanks for the cover, belle.

GAWD!! I leave the blog for a couple of days and come back to this!! I am busting a gut over here.....Whew

Gawd. Some peoples children.

It's alive and it's cumming

I'll have what she's having.

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