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January 28, 2008

LIFE IN SOUTH FLORIDA

It's not like where you live.

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judi - You should send that in to the Governor's office as a proposed new state motto.

*puts on the Who's "Pinball Wizard" as background*

That's what I think about everytime I drive under an overpass in SoFla...what's going to land on me?

The cabbie, who didn't have a fare

Apparently he didn't have a brain either.

Diva, you stole my Who joke!!

The cabbie is already this morning besieged with job offers from NYC taxi companies, who first rose to international prominence in Dave Barry's Pulitzer Prize-winning "Can New York Save Itself?"

daisy...ME TOO!! I actually look UP as I'm driving under the overpass.

I am afraid of Miami.

i'm sure a giant chicken was involved.

lol, cg.

(or as Dave would point out..it's a rooster)

Heheheh, ellie. OK - I'll share it witcha!

Or possibly a kamikaze owl. Running cars off the road is probably next on their terrorist agenda list.

Game of chicken with 20,000 bats?

The first thing the cabbie said when he woke up:

"chute"

But, but - it's not breeding date yet, sly! The police gave a FIRM DATE for the start of that! How dare those bats breed when they want to?

*zips in*™

Is pinballing the same thing as fishtailing but FL has to give it a different name?

Sure it is, judi. It happens in New York every other week.

They need to make sure that all cabbies in Miami have their pilot's license too.

Ever since I got my license,
I've never hit a wall.
From Tampa down to Key West
I've driven with them all.
But I ain't seen nothing like him
In any garage hall.
That deaf, dumb and blind guy
Drives like a real pinball!

He sits like a statue,
Becomes part of the machine.
Scraping all the bumpers
Never escaping clean.
Steers by intuition,
Can really take a fall
That deaf, dumb and blind guy
Drives like a real pinball!

He's a pinball driver
There has to be a twist.
A pin ball driver,
How does he still exist?

How do you think he does it?
I don't know!
Why does he still live?

Ain't got compound fractures
Can't stay between the rails,
Doesn't care about heights
Over the edge he sails.
Always gets a new cab
Never seems to stall,
That deaf, dumb and blind guy
Drives like a real pinball.

I thought I was
The rally fare king.
But I just handed
My pinball crown to him.

Even on my favorite freeway
He can beat my best.
His disciples strap him in
And he just goes express.
He's got crazy leadfoot ankles
Never brakes at all.
That deaf, dumb and blind guy
Drives like a real pinball!

♪ There's a song stuck in my head, thankyouverymuchDiva. ♫

Applauds Meanie!

*SNORK* & APPLAUSE @ Meanie the BlueWho!!

Look, something that y'all don't understand: this happens every day here in Miami. The only reason this made the paper was because he managed to not interrupt rush hour traffic.

:)

plus he stuck the landing.

Le dix points!

*snork* great job meanie!
we dont have cabs flying off overpasses. in ny, people throw large rocks, pumpkins, other junk. it hits the cars below. ya wanna make somethin of it?

Pumpkin pie maybe!

Meanie makes a good point: he'll have a fresh cab soon!

Was this guy from Allentown? Perhaps his footware got tangled with the pedals?

You'll notice the most significant impact of this story was that he avoided tying up traffic.

I don't know why, but Joni Mitchell's Big Yellow Taxi is sticking in my mind.

"You'll notice the most significant impact of this story was that he avoided tying up traffic."

Here in Atl we don't seem to have Kamikaze cab drivers, but if a driver sneezes it will probably create a traffic snarl.

how bout the Bob James (I think) theme from Taxi? Or maybe Depalma's rant in Taxi Driver? You lookin at me? You lookin at me? Of course the guy would have to wearin those lion king slippers for it to really work. Those are the new mowhawk you know.

Eleanor, the difference between fishtailing and pinballing has to do with whether you actually hit anything.

In Wisconsin this time of year deliberate fishtailing (or if you go 360 degrees, a doughnut) is pretty much mandatory for any teenager in Mom's car. Changing direction by bouncing off stationary objects is frowned upon as amateurish.

Pinballin' vs. Fishtailin':

Me Cap'n alway say if ye stern be waggin', its fishtailin'. If ye bow be bumpin', its pinballin'.

Cap'n ain't never been wrong yet.

btw - in the right situation, both are fun!
Southerners, don't try this at home.

I just read "Can New York Save Itself?" I think it's funny that what was an exaggeration in 1987 (you can buy a one bedroom condo for $250,000) is now a deal (a one bedroom condo for $250K? Where do I sign??)

"He has been charged with reckless driving."

That last line came as a shock to me. I figured on the guy earning a free license renewal for that one.

*snork* @ Shark Tooth.

Sounds like he's prepping for the Cab Vault in this summer's Olympics.

"Life in South Florida -- It's not like where you live"

Nope. Driver-wise, Paris is in "a whole nother league". I once mentioned to a coworker that I couldn't figure out the rules for lane changes from watching French drivers (especially in the roundabout at l'Arche de Triomphe). He replied "What lane change rules?"

Was alcohol involved? If so, did he get a FUI (flying under the influence).

Was he from Davie?? If so, was his famous last words - "Hold my beer and watch this!"??

Too many unanswered questions.

Just for the record, I have never been thrown off an overpass.

Amer is right - if I had to drive through a French roundabout, I'd surrender immediately.

Ohhh, now I get it!

I thought pinballing involved a visit to Grey Ruegamer.

I'd have driven off an overpass too.

At least he didn't hold up traffic.

I've done that, in Paris. Well, my ex was driving and it's truly one of the most frightening yet exciting experiences ever. But they seem to know what they're doing. The taxi drivers have no fear. As I understand it, when you come in you work your way to the inside and then when you want to exit you work your way to the outside. Amer?

Apparently the production company for "Dukes of Hazzard 2: We've got Jessica Simpson in a Skimpier Bikini!" have hired this guy to be the General Lee stunt driver. If you can stick a wheels down landing off and walk away with scratches nothing should ever scare you again. Possible exception being the Giants player mentioned in an earlier thread.

*meant to say, "off an overpass" dangit!*

Just for the record, I have never been thrown off an overpass.

Posted by: Punkin | 02:19 PM on January 28, 2008

ahhh, but have you ever thrown up off an overpass?

Doc - I had wheels down for a second on a forward-flip. Does that count? Landed upside-down in a snowbank when the car finally stopped moving. No scratches until a 'good samaritan' zipped my hood up for me and took caught my chin in the zipper.

'took caught'.....sigh....

I have driven in Parisian roundabouts; believe me, no one surrenders.

Hi Eleanor, Well Done!

I don't have a car, so I don't know about French roundabout rules-- although that was how I was told to drive through British roundabouts...but then Brits follow the rules. I've always maintained that the French go through the rough driving test they have here so that when they disregard traffic laws, they'll know which ones they're breaking.

I once read about one expat woman who, after driving around Paris many weeks or months, decided to brave the roundabout at the Arche de Triomphe.

She had a wreck her first time out.

I have another friend -- a native Parisian -- who developed a driving phobia when taking driving lessons.

I have driven on the left in the UK, I've driven in SoCal and NoCal traffic, and the German autobahns, but you couldn't PAY me to drive -- or even cycle -- here.

took caught = past tense of the conjoined verb take git

yeap!

snork @ Siouxie (not that I understood what you said, it just sounded funny...)

Hey, I was upside down and upset at the time. 'Take git' sounds about right to me.

hehe..thanks, daisy. I never know what I'm talking about either. I blame the wine.

Hey Siouxie - Don't bogart the wine!
*sticks out glass*

My hubby doesn't do beer, so for the Super Bowl, he bought cheap "jug wine". I guess he thinks that'll make him more manly.

AmerInParis, I walked by that Arc roundabout once, and it's, like, 8 lanes, right? I have a question or two. Does anyone ever get into the innermost lane? Why? And if one finds oneself there, how does one get out? (My guess is you have to wait for the street cleaning truck, file in behind it, and follow it to safety.)

I know, of course, what the locals' answer would be:
"ehhhhh...{Parisian shrug}"

In Bend, they have replaced all of our relly busy 4 way stops with roundabouts. I totally love them.

Ouch Annie. I once met a Idaho Department of Transportation snow plow in the middle of the night. He turned my white 67 Jag XKE Roadster into a coffeetable. I was not impressed.

Pat, I'd like to buy an A.

Cheryl, they're doing that all over Miami too. I love 'em too. Our idiot drivers can't figure out how to make a 4-way stop so this is more adventurous. Just PUNCH IT and close your eyes. Weeeeeeeeee!!

Cheryl - what a beautiful car to lose! Ugh.
Mine was a Scirocco. As it turns out, a very athletic, acrobatic car. Thank goodness.

Pssst, Annie,
How was your concert ????

Wonderful, thanks for asking! Great seats, too. Garth puts on an incredible show. Doc Rick stood me up, though, the uber-doofus. ;)
The really wild part that I didn't mention here is that after I won the tix at the Cowboy Palace, I had at least 8 guys offer to go with me. Some just gave me their numbers, saying I may need a 'back-up date.' Dang!

Good for you ! Glad you had a good time !
In Doc Rick's defense, though, we DID actually have weather this weekend.
Wow - 8 guys ??? Betcha Siouxie wishes she was here- I'm sure between the 2 of you, you could have broken some hearts. (smooches, Siouxie!)
We went for a hike up at Deukmejian Wilderness park on Sunday and got caught in the most incredible rain/snow storm - great fun !!

Annie, next time, El and I will take a few of 'em off your hands. What are friends for, right??

*smoochies* back Tel! (btw, Sushi is growing and growing!)

You're right, we're just two WILD AND CRAAAAZY GIRLS!

Annie-- I am a big fan of VW's. A fine, fine auto. I'm totally lovin' on my vintage bus.

Doc stood you up? And Garth? He must have been shot in the thigh or something. I blame Jack.

Garth was there and incredible, even in a chartreuse(lime green) shirt. Doc begged to go and never showed. His loss. I had a blast trying to guess the real cowboys from the phony ones. Lots and lots of fun research. My study is far from complete. In fact, Siouxie needs to come out here and help me with that. Ahem.
Cheryl - you're right about Vdubs. My sports car hit black ice when I was dodging a drunk driver coming at me on the wrong side of the road. I flipped it forward into a snow bank, skiing down a hill on the roof. Once you flipped it back over, it ran fine.

"nonlife-threatening injuries", huh? Once you realize what "nonlife" means, you realize he's discovered the secret to immortality! Whoohoo!

Annie, dodging drunks seems to be a common denominator for us girls getting our pefectly fine rides messed up. Same reason my little car came to be parked along side the road in a snow burm.

And chartreuse happens to be one of my fav colors--and I believe that you may be the only other person in the world that refers to it properly. Unless its available in a Monolo Blahnik, then Sio would know it too!

Hey, he looked quite good in it. Cowboy lime!

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