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November 27, 2007

SARASOTA COUNTY COMMISSIONERS

Groping the Issues

(Thanks to Jennifer Johnson)

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Commissioners heard from them all, even a soldier who just returned from his third tour of duty in Iraq. "Just so the women in Iraq didn't have to wear burkas. Now you want to cover up the women of the Cheetah, and take my rights away from me to visit the Cheetah."

Somehow, I've never thought of the military that way.
*Stands up and salutes y'all.
**Again.

The ordinance commissioners are considering would ban all alcohol from the club and it would require dancers to stay at least six feet away from the customers.

NO BOOZE???That just won't do. What about lap dances??

"If you pass this ordinance where you pass the 6 foot rule and no alcohol, we're not going to have a club. You'll put 140 girls out on the streets."

So they're talking about a change of location for the girls, not occupation? At least they'd be out in the fresh air instead of a smoke filled club.

DPC, we fight for all kinds of freedoms. I certainly can't think of a better one.

"I think it's a family oriented town. With sex as a commodity, it's not family oriented."

But, isn't that how you get a family?

"I want you to think about...all the shattered dreams of other ladies working at the Cheetah."

Yeah, then they would have to "freelance"

Oops! hee hee. I'm not Kim Jong-il, really. *ahem*

Whatever you say, Ms. Kim.

it would require dancers to stay at least six feet away from the customers.

Bye-bye lap dances!

What's a lap dance?

*blink blink*

Even here in SA cheetahs are considered endangered.

*smacks blurkie*
It's like that, but lower.

*stands aside while Annie smacks*

no sex in the champagne room

Apparently no champagne in the champagne room either...

No lap dance for you!

NO stoop for you!

Why don't they just tax the bejeebers out of it? To pay for making the rest of the town look 'normal.'

I notice they don't mention what part of town the Cheetah is in. If it's in a commercial area and not creating any problems other than ruffling the feathers of The Excessively Righteous, leave it alone!

Somehow, I do not think they were talking about these Cheetah Girls

But, as we all know, Cheetahs never prosper....

Can't they just make the club BYOB.... That's the way it used to be in my hometown and all the boys would go there to play pool because it only cost $5 to get in and you could bring an ice chest with your own beer....

I might have got a job there but I could never master the stripper pole... Kept landing on my head!

They wanna take away any semblance of an excuse I might have to EVER visit Florida ... Dang! I hate it when that happens ...

I wuz lookin' forward to havin' Dave or judi or Siouxie guidin' my tour of the ... um ... whut wuz the question?

Paper pulls story! Read all about it!

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JEC666 - maybe they're adding pictures. ;)

I'm sure seeing photos of the strippers won't impact your insightful opinions on whether the Cheetah gets to remain open. Youse guys are way too klassy for that.

Now that page has a banner ad for "Ugly Betty." Hmmmm....hope that's not foreshadowing.

Maybe the Cheetah will be re-opening as Deja VU (100's of beautiful girls, and three ugly ones).

'100 beautiful girls'? They're lion.

Mot: what's SA? South America? South Africa? Sturm Abteilung? Southern Antactica (although probably not that many cheetahs there)? San Antonio? South Abilene?

Good to know they have this well 'in hand' IYKWIM.

I'm ready for a new topic.

Any updates on the writer's strike or 24?

doesn't the "six feet away" rule, discriminate against the near-sighted? could there be an ADA violation here?

also, do i have to crumple up my dollar bills and throw them to the strippers?

Laurie - on behalf of Mott, he's in South Africa.

insom - just fling quarters.

Perhaps the writers' strike has reached this blog.

The 6-foot rule doesn't impact my enjoyment of lap dances. ;-]

I tried to give a guy a lap dance once and he wouldn't stop screaming in agony!

Maybe I should have taken my stilettos off first.....

CJrun, prolific writer of fantasy.

CJ.....did the kids in physEd make fun of you for being so small?

*snicker*

Ladies, no more need for batteries, especially during all of the Holiday traveling! If you follow the Marilyn Manson-related portion, consider yourself as having been WARNED.

CJ....I don't EVEN want to know..

Wasn't there a strip club patron who ended up suing because he got slapped in the face with a dancer's boobs and "allegedly" injured?

Maybe the six-foot rule is a good idea.... (Not that my boobs would be a threat).

Dave, put down the ripple and post something new! :-)

AD, you're just a font of lap dance injury stories. Anything you care to share with the rest of the class?

While I, with my usual enthusiasm,
Was exploring in Ermintrude's busiasm,
She explained, "They're quite flat,
But think nothing of that --
You will find that my sweet sister Susiasm."
- an old one

You mean like bubble gum, CJ? I'm not sure if I have enough for everybody....

And I'm not sure if I can chew and comment at the same time.....


Thanks, CJ! Now I know what my stocking stuffer will be ;-)))

For all those road trips...

Siouxie - there are better 'bunny travellers' out there. We can whipser privately in email. I'd hate to hijack the blog talking about such personal matters. ;)

oopsie 'whisper', not 'whipser.' What was I thinking?

*whips out her whip*

I dunno.

I love it when ya'll talk dirty....

"The purple 4ins gadget is designed to fit in glove compartments."
So that's the new euphemism.

Speaking of talkin' dirty, the Disney site sez that ...

You do not require any updates at this time.

... and further reports ...

Good News! Our tests show that you already have the appropriate browser and plug-ins ...

This has been your disneywithwhipsers update for today.

*adds glove to reincarnation list, just below bicycle seat*

CJ - it's better on cobblestones.

Cobblestones = ribbed seating

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