MOM OF THE WEEK SO FAR

(Thanks to DavCat)

Comments

[DeskDiva]

"It rubs the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again."

Whut?

[Lairbo]

The whipped cream was confiscated and will be returned at the end of the semester, and the stripper was sent to the principle's office and hasn't been seen since.

[Mahatma Kane Jeeves]

Gorilla his dreams . . .

[Jeff Meyerson]

Why didn't this ever happen to us when we were kids?

What? Just asking!

[fivver]

The stripper, who arrived on cue halfway through the lesson, first walked the birthday boy around the classroom on all fours.
Then, gyrating to the sounds of Britney Spears, she spanked him before stripping down to her bra and knickers and insisting the "naughty" schoolboy rub cream all over her body.
At that point, the teacher...

Gee wonder what tipped the teacher off?

[ellie]

Diva, I was eating lunch!!! WAS eating lunch.

*cack*

[Laurie the Rocket Scientist]

Clearly there was a mistake. After all, what 16 year old would be embarrased by a stripper?? You want to embarrass your kid, you send the gorilla!

[Rand]

Isn't anyone offended by a "drama" teacher who suddenly announces "Something is about to happen."?

Where's the theatricality of that?

[orcel]

Wow and think back in jr-high, I thought my friend's parents, who bought their son a Playboy subscription was cool!

Seriously how did the teacher let it go that far?

[DeskDiva]

YES!!! I made ellie puke!! :) *^5s self*

Rand - that's "foreshadowing." They learned it from the lit teacher.

And *snork* @ MKJ.

[Mahatma Kane Jeeves]

Guess there are possibilities . . .

[DeskDiva]

orcel - I honestly had the same question. (Your friend's parents bought him a Playboy subscription?! What were they thinking?! Then again - it wasn't the raunch it is today. Plus, I'm sure he only read it for the articles. *rolls eyes*)

[ArcticAl]

My mom never gets me any neat presents.

*pouts*

[orcel]

DD - They were the first family around that had a computer at home and we excited and impressionable kids discovered the predecessor of the internet and back then all there was online was scientific junk and p0rn. When his parents discovered what we were finding and downloading, Playboy was in their mind a reasonable compromise when it included a promise to stay away from the p0rn.

[DeskDiva]

My parents would have considered a threat of bodily harm and severe punishment to be a reasonable compromise. Heh.

[orcel]

Hey, should I be at all concerned that my spell check had no problem with the word "p0rn" ?

[orcel]

My parents too, but then being a jr. high kid, I wasn't gonna complain.

[Siouxie]

That was some smart teacher, no???

I do wonder though, if it had been a MALE teacher...would he have stopped the stripper??

*goes off to ponder*

*pondering*

*back from pondering*

ok..the answer is an obvious HELL NO!

[DeskDiva]

Funny, Siouxie - my assumption was that it was a female teacher....

[Wench Lizzy]

I think most sixteen year old boys pray for a "booking error" like that.

[queensbee]

in new york state the principal, the teacher, the 'mom', everybody, would have been reported to the child abuse hotline..... and at some school in iowa or someplace, a kid was suspended for hugging 2 of her friends. go figure.

talk about a pop quiz.

[Lairbo]

Note to the home-schooled: This doesn't happen very often; don't be too envious.

[Meanie the Blue]

He don't need no education
He don’t got no self control
He barks for orgasm in the classroom
Stripper, make that kid atone
Hey! Stripper!
Make that kid atone!
All in all, it's just another birthday service call.
All in all, you're just no gorilla after all.

[Spoken]
If you don't rub the cream, you can't have any woodies.
How can you have any woodies if you don't rub the cream?....

[Siouxie]

ROFL Meanie!!

[Lairbo]

That's just a small sample from Meanie's upcoming Rock Musical: Comfortably Numb & Comfortably Number. [lifts and waves lighter while snorking loudly]

[Not My Usual Alias]

To quote a line with the link in another thread --

At least the parent didn't show up in a Weinermobile.

[ellie]

LOL Meanie!

[Alfred Simon Fyodorovich]

No one thought of

He got to cop a feel, then see the gorrilla.

[Jeff Meyerson]

*holds up lighter alongside Lairbo for Meanie*

[DeskDiva]

MORE COWBELL!!

[Christopher Walken]

I gotta have more cowbell!

[Stephen "Cowbell" King]

*CLANK* *CLANK* *CLANK* *CLANK*

[gjd]

Okay, you all mentioned the kid and teacher...but what about the stripper? WTH was she thinking walking into a classroom and doing that?

[sthnbelle]

Lairbo and Jeff -

ISIANMTU - the boy saw a commercial or something on tv the other day that featured footage of a concert back in the day of waving lighters, and he was genuinely aghast - "What are they DOING?" Had to explain that that was what people did BEFORE cell phones...wanna slow that geezer bus down just a hair so I can drag my feeble old a$$ aboard, please?

[beaniehampton]

I want all of you to know, this exact thing happened to me when I was 16. Well, actually, I was asleep at the time...

[padraig]

gjd -- Strippers and thinking do not normally coexist.

[Brainy Jello]

This was almost exactly as it occurred in "Parenthood" with Steve Martin? And the dancer that went to the other party was severely beaten, if I remember correctly.

[hd4mtns]

So my question is - so this stripper is mistakenly sent to do her dance at the wrong assignment - where'd the gorilla go? I can just picture some poor schmo in a gorilla outfit showing up at some bachelor party armed only with his "banana".