ALL ABOARD THE GEEZER BUS
Once upon a time, there was a baby. His daddy wrote a column about the baby finding really disgusting things on the floor and putting them in his mouth. The daddy suggested stockpiling semi-disgusting things to use in trade, to get the really disgusting things away from the baby. This made the s.b. laugh and laugh, and write down the daddy's name in case he ever wrote something else funny like that.
The years go by. The daddy writes more funny stuff about the boy playing with He-Man toys, the boy and his diplodocus, his first day of school, and his experiences with Little League, helium, helicopters, middle-school parties and, of course, the weinermobile. The s.b. laughs.
Then one day, all of a sudden, the boy is teaching a class at the Miami Herald. About a program he wrote. It's a very useful program that lets us put stuff on a map.
But it is definitely not funny. Not funny at all.