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June 29, 2007

CRIMINAL MASTERMIND OF THE DAY SO FAR

Louisiana Division

(Thanks to Jon Harris)

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Rollin' back prices.... to 1954.

Attention Walmart thieves shoppers!

i have to admit that a close relative used to do this on a regular basis. of course, not being a total idiot, she'd get a tag off of something in the same department that was about half the price of the item she was actually going to purchase. the really bad part of this is that she saw absolutely nothing wrong with it at all and has more money than God to begin with.

wicked, I know a gal who has a professional shop lifter friend. She was telling me that she giver her "shop lifting list" to this girl, and the chick brings the stuff back to her.

Funny, she couldn't see the moral and ethical dilemma either.

ummm... how could she not see anything wrong with it? was she stupid?

no, she isn't stupid, but she is a psychotic, self-justifying JAP, that's my Mom. The only reason she stopped doing it is because I threatened to make a major scene in a large, well known store with many security guards and cameras. and she had the nerve to b!tch about me going 2 miles an hour over the speed limit because, after all, it was breaking the law. go figure.

wow... takes all kinds :)

p.s. sorry, didn't mean to be so blunt with the 'stupid' line! though i guess i did. but it came out sounding pretty harsh. especially since it's your mom.

Mental image: Guy carrying a bulky TV box being chased through a Wal-Mart parking lot by a bunch of blue-vested retirees. Some of them are using shopping carts as speed walkers... They are slowly gaining on him...

no one ever accused my mom of being smart, conniving maybe, but not smart. lucky though. won mega bucks on some Irish lottery deal many years ago.

silly man, all he had to do was wait for hurricane season, then get one for free.

Man, how did that briliant foolproof plan fail?

Bethie, one very alert cashier.

Ah, but he used the self-checkout. This is indicative of many months worth of careful planning.

as for the walmutt teevee bandito... doig! what a maroon. everybody knows that you cannot possibly get a teevee for under 20 bucks. now that was your mistake there, bucko. they never wouldda noticed if you'd switched with some towels selling for 22.48. wonder if you get cable in jail?

The "Ouachita" correctional center?

Throw a "t" in there for a snork!

Mr. Simms should have purchased the television in the Security monitoring room--the one that allowed the guards to witness his price tag switch.

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