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April 25, 2007

WHY WE NEED GUYS

Guys are problem-solvers.

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Fist to say that at least he got the snake.

What a moron. Everyone knows the right way to kill a snake: use C4. Ask Jack if you don't believe me.

Key quote:
"Either to shoo it off or just to ignore it and let it go away but I wouldn't recommend anyone pouring gas on a snake right by your house."


How do you shoo a snake?

I would have thought Jack would have had to improvise to gt a snake... no thighs, and all.

Suppose there wasn't anyone hurt in the fire?

... that is other than the snake?

*sneaks back to insert a wayward e*

Isn't Lynchburg where they distill Jack? Just wondering about that coincidence

Isn't this urban legend to be based on the running, blazing mouse/rat/squirrel?

AA??

How do you shoo a snake? With THESE!

I'd shoo, too, if I saw someone coming at me in those, Siouxie.

Siouxie, with those you don't need to shoo the snake, you just skewer it (and toss it on the barbie).

Siouxie...Please wear these with the pink nurse's outfit.... and I'll bring the suppositories.

Just ignore it? Really? Not likely where I live. This is one of those things that's not wise to ignore. Kind of like ignoring your wife on her birthday. Both could be deadly.

Jeff....I've had sauteed' rattle snake....it was tasty. Like a chicken on crack

*snork* @ Jazzzzie!

no suppositories thank you!

The snake man is in Lynchburg, VA. Jack D is brewed in Lynchburg, TN. Lynchburg, VA is known for Jerry Fallwell and not much else (nice town, though)

http://www.retroweb.com/lynchburg/attractions/main.html


BTW - serves the bastid right.

But whatever will the pink nurse wear?

NT......uuuhhhhhhh nothing???

Oh and Jeff? you're right. I bet the skewered snake would go great with that penis sausage grilling on the other thread.

btw...Skewered Snakes wbagnfa punk b!

Heck, the guy fried some poor little garden snake.

Jazzzzz - don't waste your money on suppositories. My doctor prescribed some for me a while ago and for all the good they did I could have just stuffed them up my a$$.

Shoes
and Snakes
and Suppositories
Oh, my!

And on Hump Day™, no less.

No wonder that nurse is pink... she's embarrassed... um... embareassed?

Shoesmonger, go eat bot.

Th WHAFivver...........Brilliant!!! Flavored suppositories!!! We'll be rich!!

And not constipated...

I starts off with snakes, burning houses, Jack Daniels and within a flash we're back to anal humour, tsk, tsk.

And a tough segue it was!
*moons beams proudly*

DB story in today's Palm Beach Post:

http://www.palmbeachpost.com/accent/content/accent/epaper/2007/04/25/a1e_dave_barry_0425.html

Thanks, Jeannie.

Jeannie's link.

WHOA!! check out the specs on THAT geezer chick!!!

Thanks Jeff, I can't do that!

He also has a criminally side-splitting blog at his Web site...

we're famous!!

Siouxie, wouldn't the 'criminally' part make us infamous?

Mmm, Siouxie! Nice Boots!
Hope you have a pair...

I could post a photo of an ear of corn, and in an hour I'd have 78 comments and some reference to Barry Manilow.

C'mon Dave, make the post and let's do it.
*starts rooting through bag of corny jokes*

Hey, Hot Young Elvis:
Would you mind if I stole borrowed this quote
It's amazing to me how offended people can be by things that were not meant to be offensive. They just enjoyed being offended, and they think that the fact that they are offended is the only argument they need to prove that whatever you did was wrong.
??

I sense a kernel of truth in that statement.

Very true, fivver.

Thanks, jon - the OTHER boot is somewhere up Baron's @ss for posting a Barry Manilow picture!!


Hmmm...that sounds like a challenge there, Mr. Blog!!

"78 comments and some reference to Barry Manilow"
Oooh! That did sound like a challenge, didn't it? Yay!

That ought to put some starch in our spines!

*waves @ Hammie*

Careful where you poke that cob!

DPC

I am SO offended by that!

"Friends, Romans, country maids! Lend me your (not you're) ears!"

Or our shorts, Tammy. Just sayin'.

GMTA, fiv. That was my first thought when I saw that comment.

Jeannie - and did you enjoy it?

Snork@Chicken on crack

Careful, people, Manilow may be stalking us.

DPC - of course!

It's ok Meanie...we're not afraid...you blog dudes are quite husky.

I'll be aMAIZED if we don't get the 78 posts ;-)

Whenever BM (nb: what an APPROPRIATE set of initials) is playing even the corn has it's finger in it's ears.

*waiting patiently for the picture of corn and start of a new thread*

*keeps his ears peeled*

*Waves @ Siouxie!*

Sometimes, I am amaized at the depths that people will stoop to make a pun.

Ahh, Siouxie, you beat me. Apologies.

It's ok, Hammie ;-)

I am willing to share the corniness...this time.

(awaiting her chocolates)

*Hammond beaten by Siouxie, lucky dog*

Siouxie didn't just beat him, she creamed him!

For Siouxie:
Chocolate

oooooooooh!! chocolate shoes!! do I wear 'em?? eat 'em??

fivver, not to worry...stand in line and I'll smack ya a few times too ;-)

I will now apologize for the aforementioned use of the BM link in a previous thread. I am truly sorry for my actions, and offer this bit of eye candy for all you ladies of the female persuasion (Siouxie, et. al.) out there.

*makes note to kidnap Bãrön vønKlyff and lock him in the Liberace Museum (yes, there is one) overnight*

okay, it's hot wax time for Baron.

*SNORKSMACK* Baron!!

*grabs shotgun and turns hounds loose*
he's gonna be the bloody red baron...

I think "Flaming the Snake" WBAG euphemism for something. I just can't think of what.....

With those shoes, Siouxie, you just need the right person to eat them while you're wearing them.
Now I wonder where that person is... .

Does anyone else notice the extremely low perkiness quotient on the news channel 10 team?

Thank you. Thank you very much. I will be here all week (at least until 3:00pm Central daily)

Hot wax (candle, not from a jar) and getting smacked around. Now, that's my idea of fun. I should have played the Liberace card months ago.

I see them regularly, Chuck, & they stay perky even when they try to scare you with the life threatening storms that you only find out about using their radar (the same one as everyone else's).
You'll notice that their site says "On your side". I always knew the guys at Channel 7 were out to get me!

Sorry, jon! those are my shoes and no one else is gonna eat 'em! I don't share my chocolates ;-P

Baron, I should have known you'd like that...but you're still in deep Tancredo.

I suppose, Siouxie, that if you're keeping up with your yoga, you could eat & wear simultaneously... .

Hmm...I'll have to practice my Pilates moves then.

*stretches forward*

oww

Let us know what time that show is on, Siouxie
=)

Siouxie - I'll help you out if you aren't flexible enough today.

Double fivver *snorks*!

Chris, stretch or eat my shoes???

jon, I can barely touch my toes..it'll be a while ;-P

Either way. Just let me know.

Well, we made it to the required 78 posts, but it took longer than an hour, and we weren't commenting on a picture of corn.

*will keep that in mind, Chris* ;-P

AND BEND AND STRETCH AND BEND AND STRETCH...

Jon-

those channel 7 guys are a sinister looking bunch. especially the second guy from the left. and the gal on the left just looks like a cut out head (a la Leetie)

Maybe this will help Siouxie — a little more interactive..

*ordering 2 cases now*

Thanks, jon!!

Ya knowwww, if'n you read Mot's 9:56 with a southern accent it just sounds like a normal, Deliverance kinda day....

Would you like those delivered, Siouxie?
Maybe with a nice bottle of red?
>:-}

Wow, that got out of hand real fast... And yto hink it started with a snake and not Jack Bauer....NTTAWWT...

*ahem*

Bottle of red...bottle of white...whatever kind of mood I'm in tonight...

A bottle of red & a bottle of white... I think we can guess what kind of mood that puts Siouxie in!

LOL the passed OUT mood!

It all depends upon her appetite....

Was anyone hurt in the fire?

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