AND THEN SHERYL CROW WILL SAY IT WAS JUST A JOKE

Comments

[Eleanor]

I hope Sheryl wasn't responsible for this.

[Eleanor]

FIRST on a Saturday - yay me!

[Mot the Hoople]

Of course the South African Standards Authority would need to know that the rolls contained the requisite number of sheets. We wouldn't want the inmates to be ripped off.

[From another world]

Three bars of soap? In one month?

NTTATWWT

[From another world]

'They may begin to use toilet paper as money'

Is that Washington or Lincoln?'

'Neither, its yesterday's meatloaf'

[Sheryl *Eating* Crow]

I had nothing to do with this.

[Deskdiva]

*snork* @ Suzy Crow...

[Siouxie]

gracias ;-)

[From another world]

Over heard in cell block A

No Bill, I dont have a square to spare.

Listen mother@%*! this aint Seinfeld, you better pass me some TP or sleep with one eye open from now on.

[judi]

toilet paper fights infection?! since when?

[Siouxie]

judi, forget the infection...cleaning toilets??? how the fuff??

[Eleanor]

Well, if one didn't ever use it at all, problems could ensue, IYKWIM. :)

[The blog reader formerly known as Matt]

I agree judi. I'm not sure if wrapping
it up in TP will help in prison.

[The blog reader formerly known as Matt]

By the way, WARNING!!!

[Siouxie]

EEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWW Ex-Matt!!!

[Bethie]

"Warning" is not warning enough!

[The blog reader formerly known as Matt]

Hey, I warned. In capital no less.
It could have been
worse.

[Siouxie]

*SMACKS* Ex-Matt! Oh no you DIN'T!!

(thank GOD for the 'hover')

[The blog reader formerly known as Matt]

*Considers smacks foreplay*

*watches to duck baseball bat*

[Kristina L.]

I'm beginning to think it's safer to wait and not click on any of these links until I see what other people say about them. Yikes! Thank goodness for hover.

[Bethie]

judi, perhaps toilet paper has antioxidants.

[Eleanor]

That's what I do now Kristina, wait for others reactions, because I'm more squeamish than most, so if someone is saying ick! I know it's not for me. :)

[Catherine]

Did anyone get a check on the online poll on the sidebar of that page? "What do YOU think of the new "welcome to Kansas" sign? Honestly, a toilet paper article and that online poll...

[Mo Faux]

Dont forget people, a shiv can be made out of ANYTHING......

[insomniac]

"please don't shank the Charmin"

[mm]

Dont forget people, a shiv can be made out of ANYTHING......

not to mention what can be made into drug paraphernalia

[Stevie W]

Bidet uh, bidet uh, bidet uh, bidet uh, bidet uh, bidet uh, th-th-th-that stall, folks!!

[GungaDan]

Three hots, a cot and a square

[The blog reader formerly known as Matt]

May I present another
alternative?

And does anyone dare click?

[Kristina L.]

I don't dare :)

[Betsy]

FRONT to BACK, gosh darnit, to avoid hideous UTI's.

And, while their newsteam isn't terribly perky, WILD! ITALIC! FONTS! on the right hand side are pretty scary.

(And yeah...the welcome to Kansas sign kind of rounds it all off)

[The blog reader formerly known as Matt]

Betsy, there was a guy I went to school with whose girlfriend nicknamed him stinky balls. Guess which habit of his earned him that moniker? And guess how active his social life was afterwards?

[Kathybear]

A woman should wipe front to back to avoid getting anything in that delicate region between #1 and #2... Just sayin'.

[Deskdiva]

*blindly gropes for blogits*

Siouxie, put down that bat. That is not punishment for The blog reader formerly known as XMATT

*facing in wrong direction*

And ALL I HAVE TO SAY, guy, is that you are now going to be known herewith as "HERPESEXMATT." See what THAT does to your blog reputation.

THAT is your punishment.

*heads wrong way down hallway to try to find the eye bleach tub to correct the egregious error.*

Warning, indeed.... Humph.

[shellann]

Do you suppose they'll allow "roll-over"? Will sadistic meal-planners schedule chili for the end of the month? Will visitors be checked by TP-sniffing dogs to prevent smuggling? This story raises so many questions.

[HerpesExMatt]

*accepts punishment*

I blame society. I read judi's post, a certain treatment commercial comes on....c'mon, whose mind wouldn't go there?

So it was as bad as I thought. You don't think I'd actually click on that link myself do you?

[crossgirl]

this just a bad idea. After the t.p. allotment runs out, you just know the men will use magazines, paper towels and newspapers. plumbing blockages are guaranteed.

[ArcticAl]

Actually CG we use the Sears catalogue.

[emlak]

thank you very good nice topic thanks :)

[Deskdiva]

NICE? NICE topic? Sheesh. Newbie. ;)

[CJrun]

I just tried the Sear's catalog and now my lap top needs attention!

[KDF]

You know it's quiet around here when the spammers attack the top thread. (Looking forward to cooperate with you, too... my left foot is a half size larger than my right. Please say you can help me!)

And just sayin' -- there is far TMI in the comments section here. :)

*stocks up on Lys0l™ and Cl0rox wipes™ *

[Edgar Greenberg]

Kewenlong: Nice try, but No one is going to buy shoes from you after what you did.

[posted by]

anagram time: Sheryl U Crow , Raving Idiot.

[CJrun]

It's quiet from my neighborhood as I'm following the NFL draft, cooking, and listening to the 'Community Radio' Saturday Night R&B! Spammers are ignorable.

[Jazzzz]

CJ....In the next day or two, I'd be interested on your take on the draft. I worked all day and didn't see it. I did hear Jamaal Anderson went #8.

[Jazzzz]

judi...... As Richard Pryor said.... "You got to wash that a$$ every day....you can let the armpits go a day or two, but you got to stay on that aSS!"

[CJrun]

Jazzzz, I posted an extensive Draft write-up on the Blogits Forum. I will update it as I get the energy. Commissioner Roger Godell announced that that was the longest 1st Round in history, a record they didn't want to break. The good news,through three rounds Miami is looking pretty smart. The Jags are going future defensive stars. Cleveland cleaned everybody's clock with a road-grading Offensive Lineman, then Brady Quinn. What a fun, unusual draft!!

[Just Ducky]

Yet another Longhorn went to the Tennessee Titans: Michael Griffin. He joins other former Longhorn standouts Bo Scaife, Ahmad Hall, and that quarterback, Vince Young. We'll be calling them the University of Texas, Tennessee campus, if they keep collecting Longhorns.

Bad news (to me): Thorpe award winner, Longhorn Aaron Ross, went to the Giants. Not good for my Cowboys!

[CJrun]

Ducky, you obviously have Bird Flu and are as sick as I am. That's why I kept my football mania off the Blog today. Please go check my 1st round blathering, then throw bricks. Strangest draft I ever closely followed.

I suppose I need a life.

[ShyJan]

Good evening all. I've just finished working twelve days (eight of them were 10-hour days) with one day off in the middle.
I am pooped! And off to check CJ's draft day picks. I missed draft day and the San Jose Sharks game two in their quest to bring the Stanley Cup to where it belongs...

[Marica The Enigma]

I heard she is engaged to Mr. Whipple.
Anyway, I don't care what Cheryl said. I wanna suck up to Dave for a minute here. I LOVED "The Book of Bad Songs" and wish you'd write a sequel. I have a song for you to include. I don't know the title but they play it ALL the time on the radio. The chorus goes, "You're beautiful, you're beautiful, you're beautiful it's true. I saw your face, in a crowded place now I don't know what to do. Cuz I'll never be with you." This song BUGS me. He saw a girl on a bus or someplace and she smiled at him and now he's whining in a song about how he'll always love her but will never see her again. GET A LIFE BUDDY! Join Love@AOL or that other stupid one that Dr. Phil endorses. PerfectMatch.com?? Whatever.
Come on Dave, "The Book of Bad Songs Part Deux". Wadda ya say?

[CJrun]

OK, I'm going do to something very embarrassing here. Apparently, I'm an idiot and I can't find a mammal with an upper jaw dental formula of 3 I, 1 C, 3 P and 3 M. Something is wrong with this. Before I completely embarrass myself somebody tell me what I must be missing!

Yes, I know bats and shrews are dragged along the internet as 3/3s, but that is incorrect. Once you get past the silliness on the Net, what has three Premolars and three Molars? What has a dental formula of 3 I, 1 C, 3 P and 3 M? Nothing has 3 Premolars and 3 Molars, in the Order Carniviora, except Bats and Shrews. Even then, I consider that a misprint and don't believe for one second that Bats and shrews have a 3 3 dentition pattern. There is no doubt in my mind... I see this as a Canid skull. Therefore it should be 4 P, 2 M.

Honestly, as a 3 P, 3 M skull, I am stumped. All I have left to consider is a juvenile. with an unusual tooth pattern, but a young one. Somebody that knows mammal skulls better than me, I'll send photos to, but the dentition is what is wrong. I admit it, I'm stumped unless this is just a weird member of Canidae that is unusual within the breed.

If you are aware of 3 P and 3 M upper jaws, please drop me a note. Real ones. Please don't trouble me with the silly 3/3 Bat or shrew stuff, as there is an apparent internet glitch on that, based upon a test at Stanford. It's ridiculous on it's face for a shrew or a bat to have a 3 P, 3 M dental formula, but that's the answer according to a mistaken test.

The only member I can think of that should have a 3 P, 3 M formula is a dog, a member of the family Canidae. Canidae always has 4 Premolars and 2 Molars.

Throwing it out there, as I am stumped. In my opinion, I'm looking at a skull that is 100 mm, front to back, no real crests, and a 3 P 3 M dentition. I would sooner buy Bobcat than Bat. Bats don't have real Molars, regardless of the internet. Something about this tells me this a Canid. Something, not books or the internet, tells me this jaw belongs to Canidae. Just a guess, but that's my belief.

Niters.

[Annie Where-but-here]

CJ - I don't know what you're smoking, and I'm not sure I wanna find out. But sometimes the last premolar is mistaken for a molar. Or maybe it's a porcupine. Horses can also have a dental formula of 3 I, 1 C, 3 P (or 4) and 3 M, but yours is much too small for that.

Whatever it is, I call dibs on its allotment of tp.

And quit yapping about f'ball. It's baseball season, dangit!

[Jazzzz]

CJ....try one of those ultra sonic mole deterrents. They are supposed to work well, and somewhat humane.

[Siouxie]

Good morning!

*yawn*

WOW...I missed all the talk about moles and the blog being drafty.

*closes air vents & gets coffee maker going*

*re-stocks the blog TP*

*puts quiche in the oven*

[Jazzzz]

quiche on a stick? kinda like corn dogs? I'll take one.

[blurk]

So I'm NOT the only one awake this mornin'!

Hullo everyone!!

Sioux, check yer email.
AGAIN

[Jazzzz]

mornin' Mr. Blurk!! and Siouxie the biouxty..

[Siouxie]

Mornin' blurk & Jazzzzie!!! LOL

I'm on my way out though...gotta pick up the daughter at a friends and then get ready to go to a HEAT'S GAME!! (estrogen centrale had an extra playoff ticket and invited ME) YAY!! I was told to bring them luck as this is IT for them. Anyone know where I can get this luck thing???

[blurk]

Hey Jazzz!!
Just enjoyin' some coffee and the mornin' birds chirpin' before I have to head to the ranch and chase cows all day.
Upside: The boss bought a new horse I getta try out today.
Downside: He (the horse) may be a killer and/or demonically possessed. In which case, I love you all...get well cards will be appreciated.

[Siouxie]

Be careful, blurk!! don't break anything vital!

[blurk]

*uses duct tape to avoid non-G rated CPR comment*

[ArcticAl]

Just remember Blurk, it's heels down and weight centered, not heels centered and weight down.

I wish I was out there with you. Chasing my neighbour's holsteins around the field just isn't the same.

[CJrun]

I chased down and caught a cow skull the same day I caught the Mystery Demon From Hell Skull. It was easy to identify, what with horns and the rest of the skeleton lying there. Biologist Junior (a cg loaner) asked me what a cow was doing there. I allowed, 'apparently, dying.' I am an awful person, sometimes!!

I will post a link to the photo of the jaw from the MDFHS. This may allow me to not embarrass myself by send the photo to a Vet friend. She will laugh at me and I'm trying to avoid that. Annie will laugh at me anyway, so there's not much downside risk....

[CJrun]

Stoopid MDFHS.

I will buy Annie's fourth Premolar may be mistaken for a Molar argument, but then I will have to laugh at silly vertebrate anatomists. I mean, after all, what's the point? (< see that? a little anatomy humor there)

Please help, or if you can't help please just wish for the summer to hurry along so football will get here!

[Deskdiva]

*uses duct tape to avoid non-G rated CPR comment*

Posted by: blurk | 09:38 AM on April 29, 2007

Dang it! I miss allll the fun. :(

[Deskdiva]

Dangit, Siouxie. My finger came unglued. Got any more?

[Deskdiva]

This is weird. I DID both of these actions....

[Siouxie]

ohh blurk....I love it when I make you take out the duct tape!! LOL