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February 14, 2007
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Walter is looking for a hot walrus v@gina bone.
Good luck, Walter!!
Posted by: The Dread Pirate Chris | February 14, 2007 at 12:57 PM
Although, with the bib, he might need all the luck he can get.
Posted by: The Dread Pirate Chris | February 14, 2007 at 12:58 PM
Hope he practices safe oosex.
Posted by: Brainy Jello | February 14, 2007 at 12:58 PM
Ooh, me, me, I wanna get lucky!
Posted by: casey | February 14, 2007 at 12:58 PM
Dave - Are those Sophie's doll clothes on Walter? Please God, tell me nooooooooo..........
Posted by: Meditrina | February 14, 2007 at 12:58 PM
hehehe, if he gets lucky enough, he might need the bib.
Posted by: casey | February 14, 2007 at 12:59 PM
LOL LOL LOL LOL
followed by a major
SNORK.
Can someone order me a new phone. At least I didn't hit the monitor again.
Posted by: Juggler of Geese | February 14, 2007 at 01:01 PM
What a boner, he sure expects to get lucky.
Posted by: Mot the Hoople | February 14, 2007 at 01:02 PM
This is SO wrong and SO disturbing on SO many levels that I'll just have to send it around to all of my friends.
Posted by: Clean Hands | February 14, 2007 at 01:02 PM
Hey, Walter must be Irish, because he's clearly covering his head with that
sunbonnet.Posted by: Meditrina | February 14, 2007 at 01:03 PM
Ooooh, Walter! Looking
pointysharp today...*trying bravely to resist saying he may be hard up for a date...*
Posted by: Nurse Tammy | February 14, 2007 at 01:03 PM
Walter looking to land some tail?
Posted by: The blog reader formerly known as matt | February 14, 2007 at 01:07 PM
I find that image very disturbing - and yet, I can't look away...
Posted by: Punkin Poo | February 14, 2007 at 01:07 PM
Awww, he's so cute....
Posted by: Hammond Rye | February 14, 2007 at 01:10 PM
Wooo hooo Walter!! looking mighty
stiffspiffy!Posted by: Siouxie | February 14, 2007 at 01:12 PM
Hey, Dave and Judi, we're getting a little bored here. Can you throw us a bone? Something to chew on? Spit ..... out.......
Posted by: Meditrina | February 14, 2007 at 01:13 PM
Hey Hammie! where ya been?? we were just
waxing hairy guyschit ch@tting on a previous thread.Posted by: Siouxie | February 14, 2007 at 01:17 PM
Guess he's looking at having a whale of a time later tonight.
Posted by: Mot the Hoople | February 14, 2007 at 01:19 PM
Mrs. Blog must have gone to the office today. Dave is playing dress up with Walter again.
Very cute outfit, Walter. Wonder who's the lucky gal? Is Walter still carrying judi's picture?
The snow finally stopped here. We are, officially, up to our Tancredos in snow.
Posted by: Jessica R. | February 14, 2007 at 01:19 PM
Well, let's just hope Walter is up to it.
Posted by: Val | February 14, 2007 at 01:19 PM
Psst Hammie, about those pictures you sent me of the gals flashing the other night, they're pretty good and the proceeds of the sale are going towards my trip.
Posted by: Mot the Hoople | February 14, 2007 at 01:23 PM
somehow, i just can't help thinking that if dave had been allowed to play with dolls at an early age, he wouldn't now feel compelled to dress up his walrus penis bone.
someone, send him a g.i. joe (with fishnet stockings, of course).
or get walter bespoke outfits.
Posted by: sj | February 14, 2007 at 01:23 PM
hehehe. Val said "up" to it.
Posted by: The blog reader formerly known as matt | February 14, 2007 at 01:24 PM
*wonders if Hammie noticed anything about his socks...*
Posted by: Nurse Tammy | February 14, 2007 at 01:26 PM
Mawwiage in North Carolina
Posted by: The blog reader formerly known as matt | February 14, 2007 at 01:26 PM
The truly scary part is that I recognize the clothes! They're made for those plastic ducks and geese people put on their patios. Yes, holiday clothing for lawn ornaments.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | February 14, 2007 at 01:27 PM
Annie, that IS scary.
Posted by: Mot the Hoople | February 14, 2007 at 01:29 PM
Well things are sure looking up this Valentine's Day! Happy Valentine's day to Dave and judi, and all the bloggers. I'll raise a toast for you all. Especially since there is some coconut rum in the pantry just calling my name today.
Posted by: Beppie | February 14, 2007 at 01:32 PM
Annie, you need to go outside more. Or actually less. A lot less. Yes that's it.
Posted by: Edgar Greenberg | February 14, 2007 at 01:32 PM
Dave has patio ducks? or perhaps flamingos?
Very So.Fl.!
Posted by: Siouxie | February 14, 2007 at 01:33 PM
Somewhere, a walrus is crying.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | February 14, 2007 at 01:36 PM
Actually, MtB, that particular walrus is now "retired."
Posted by: Clean Hands | February 14, 2007 at 01:38 PM
Happy Valentine's Day Beppie!
*notices Walter already has his hat on*
Posted by: Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa | February 14, 2007 at 01:39 PM
Plastic flamingos, Siouxie. They are really to throw off crazed stalkers (cross out thingie) fans because we know that Dave is too cool to have those on his lawn.
Posted by: Jessica R. | February 14, 2007 at 01:40 PM
Hey Walter? maybe ken can lend you these sexy boxers to go with your outfit?
Posted by: Siouxie | February 14, 2007 at 01:40 PM
You can leave your hat on...
Posted by: Reddsuss | February 14, 2007 at 01:44 PM
I swear, a guy goes off for a little recreational jury duty and all kinds of fun things happen. What'd I miss? And do I want to know about my socks?
*suddenly afraid*
Posted by: Hammond Rye | February 14, 2007 at 01:45 PM
Hammie, look at the "need a lift" thread. Be very, very afraid indeed.
Posted by: Nurse Tammy | February 14, 2007 at 01:52 PM
No need to read the Valentine's thread, Hammie.
(CH, deserved it though) ;-)
Posted by: Siouxie | February 14, 2007 at 01:56 PM
I have found where Walter must shop.
Is this our very own 'Just Ducky'? If so, she's got some 'splainin' to do.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | February 14, 2007 at 01:56 PM
Annie, you weren't kidding huh??
People actually DO this????
Posted by: Siouxie | February 14, 2007 at 02:00 PM
Yay! Psychedelic socks! I would've worn them to court yesterday! With purple
tasselstasslesthingies?Posted by: Hammond Rye | February 14, 2007 at 02:01 PM
um, ok, since you asked....I own some goose holiday clothes. But ONLY for big holidays, and they're for my pet stuffed crow. And he LIKES it.
...sigh...
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | February 14, 2007 at 02:02 PM
OMGWTFBBQ the blog has a concrete goose? i just went and looked again, and that sure looks like a goose outfit. lemme splain. round these parts (ohio) folks like to decorate their lawn with a variety of tasteless objects, many of which are the object of scorn and ridicule from folks from more sophisticated parts of the world, like new york, L.A. and (i assume) miami, (the boobs and bling capital) florida. chief among these ornamental objects is the concrete goose, which is a life-size goose replica. people display these geese in their yard or (more often) on their porch wearing a variety of outfits custom made to fit the goose physique. people change the outfits for different holidays, so for instance on thanksgiving you could have your goose dressed up like a pilgrim, or a witch for halloween. when my relatives from california come for a visit they invariably end up pointing at someone's goose and laughing themselves hoarse. i had no idea that our cultural backwardness and our pants-wettingly funny lack of coolness awareness could have spread as far as miami, which, from reports i have read, is about as cool as you can possibly get or an armpit of a town depending if you believe the liberal media or the right-wing conspiracy.
Posted by: mudstuffin | February 14, 2007 at 02:03 PM
I hope he spent $158 dollar on his girl.....
Posted by: Chaz | February 14, 2007 at 02:04 PM
For the record: Happy Valentine's Day, Ladies! I would offer all of you chocolate, roses, and diamonds (strappy shoes for Siouxie, too)if I were in your presence.
Posted by: Hammond Rye | February 14, 2007 at 02:05 PM
mud, meet Annie....
Posted by: Siouxie | February 14, 2007 at 02:09 PM
WOW!! chocolate, roses, shiny bling AND strappy shoes????
Hammie, will you marry me????
Posted by: Siouxie | February 14, 2007 at 02:12 PM
Siouxie, what about Mot? Didn't he ask first?
Posted by: Hammond Rye | February 14, 2007 at 02:15 PM
mud, nice to meet you....take a gander at my prior post. (btw - one of the 'goose clothes' sites bragged about clothing as seen on 'My Name is Earl'.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | February 14, 2007 at 02:15 PM
Actually, Hammie...Mot has yet to propose to ME. I think my boots scare him...or the wax...or the whip. I can't tell for sure.
men! hmmpf!
Posted by: Siouxie | February 14, 2007 at 02:20 PM
Hammie, you obviously haven't read the new word, blogamy, created by Tammy. It means we have carte blanche vis a vis relationships on the blog.
Posted by: Mot the Hoople | February 14, 2007 at 02:22 PM
*gloating - my word is being used*
Posted by: Nurse Tammy | February 14, 2007 at 02:23 PM
oh Annie? you wouldn't happen to have photos of your crow all dressed up?
Posted by: Siouxie | February 14, 2007 at 02:24 PM
You look nice in Gloat, Nurse Tammy.
Posted by: Hammond Rye | February 14, 2007 at 02:25 PM
Just a thought, by some stretch of the imagination could Walter not be described as a vagina mono log?
Posted by: Mot the Hoople | February 14, 2007 at 02:26 PM
annie: because of my brothers's family's reaction to the geese, and because i am a shallow man, i hunted around and found a hollow plastic version (light enough to take in my luggage) and bought a "cow" outfit for it complete with fake udders. The plastic goose with udders is now proudly displayed (for my brother is also a shallow man) in an otherwise severly hip area in the S.F. Bay.
Posted by: mudstuffin | February 14, 2007 at 02:27 PM
Siouxie - I'll have to look around. We were having trouble with the summer outfit - seems he couldn't quite fill out the bikini top. So I put a couple of hard candies in the cups to make him look more natural. Yup - "breast mints."
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | February 14, 2007 at 02:28 PM
I believe you mean "hooha"
Posted by: Hammond Rye | February 14, 2007 at 02:28 PM
so far the words that have jumped out at me at strappy-shoes, breats, bikini, bone and plastic...
is there something wrong with me?
Posted by: Chaz | February 14, 2007 at 02:31 PM
LOL cute, Mot.
Posted by: Siouxie | February 14, 2007 at 02:31 PM
Chaz - yes - you're a crummy speller.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | February 14, 2007 at 02:32 PM
Chaz, yes.
next question?
LOL Annie!!
Posted by: Siouxie | February 14, 2007 at 02:33 PM
Only the breats part
Posted by: Hammond Rye | February 14, 2007 at 02:34 PM
Is that different from yeee ha! Hammie?
Posted by: Mot the Hoople | February 14, 2007 at 02:34 PM
Maybe breats are another part of the female anatomy?!
Posted by: Jessica R. | February 14, 2007 at 02:42 PM
*trying to ascertain exactly which color and/or fit a gloat is...*
*also wondering if Jazzzz will ever notice his sock vandalism*
Posted by: Nurse Tammy | February 14, 2007 at 02:42 PM
Mud, I am in Ohio too. Flocks of cement geese live in my neighborhood. What county are you in?
Posted by: Jessica R. | February 14, 2007 at 02:44 PM
NT, Jazzzz probably thinks the enhancements/adornments are great.
Posted by: Mot the Hoople | February 14, 2007 at 02:44 PM
Walter looks like he's dressed for an 'impotent' date tonight....
Posted by: PirateBoy | February 14, 2007 at 02:48 PM
A garden gnome is one thing, a dressed up cement or plastic goose is a whole different ball of wax. Think I'm gonna bring my American family back to sanity in crime ridden SA.
Posted by: Mot the Hoople | February 14, 2007 at 02:49 PM
What time are you picking me up tonight, Walter?
Posted by: Suzy Q | February 14, 2007 at 02:50 PM
.. with a knick-knack, Walter whack, give a dog a bone ...
Posted by: MOTW | February 14, 2007 at 02:55 PM
Suzy, may I suggest an appropriate dining establishment?
Posted by: Siouxie | February 14, 2007 at 02:56 PM
So, is Walter wearing a cute floppy hat and a vest or a Pimp hat and a Dickie?
Our family tradition, as we had no odd concrete goose, was for my daughter to dress up the family housecats. This stopped soon after she discovered boys.
(Not that she now dresses up boys... well, not that I am aware of)
Posted by: Hammond Rye | February 14, 2007 at 02:59 PM
(Hammie, I would worry more about her doing the opposite, if I were you.)
Posted by: Nurse Tammy | February 14, 2007 at 03:03 PM
"Mr. DeMille, I'm ready for my clothes up."
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | February 14, 2007 at 03:06 PM
*sniff*
Nothing says Happy Valentine's Day like a dressed up bone from a walrus penis.
*happy sigh*
Thank you Dave.
Posted by: Susan | February 14, 2007 at 03:06 PM
What a lovely and appropriate suggestion, Siouxie!
Posted by: Suzy Q | February 14, 2007 at 03:06 PM
hey guys !! ...I've been busy looking for my socks. Lotta "action" this Valentine's Day.
Posted by: Jazzzz | February 14, 2007 at 03:12 PM
Hot pink sequins with lavender lace ruffles and puce tatting - so nondescript. How will you ever tell your socks from those belonging to other people, Jazzzz?
Posted by: Nurse Tammy | February 14, 2007 at 03:17 PM
NT....That sounds ok if I don't necessarily wear them on my FEET!! ;-D
Posted by: Jazzzz | February 14, 2007 at 03:20 PM
NT....That sounds ok if I don't necessarily wear them on my FEET!! ;-D
Posted by: Jazzzz | February 14, 2007 at 03:20 PM
jessica r.
i am a proud resident of franklin county, as all the old timers know, i live within earshot of ohio stadium.
Posted by: mudstuffin | February 14, 2007 at 03:21 PM
the bot just said something about my momma !!
Posted by: Jazzzz | February 14, 2007 at 03:22 PM
Hi Jazzzzie!! Happy V-Day!
Posted by: Siouxie | February 14, 2007 at 03:23 PM
Bone, bone on the blog,
Where the geese and the walruses play.
Where seldom is heard,
A discouraging word,
And the ladies drink scotch by the bay.
Posted by: Hanna | February 14, 2007 at 03:24 PM
*still snickering about Jazzzz's socks*
Posted by: Nurse Tammy | February 14, 2007 at 03:27 PM
Hey Siouxie ♡...Happy
VDValentines DayNT...I've got an eye on you :-)
Posted by: Jazzzz | February 14, 2007 at 03:33 PM
mud, Stark county here. We run when Hall of Fame week rolls around.
Posted by: Jessica R. | February 14, 2007 at 03:35 PM
VD = give your loved one something to remember you by....
Posted by: Siouxie | February 14, 2007 at 03:40 PM
Chaz - yes - you're a crummy speller.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | 02:32 PM on February 14, 2007
just a bad typerer
Posted by: Chaz | February 14, 2007 at 03:43 PM
*checks to make sure jammies cover the essentials*
*whew*
Whatsamatta, Jazzzz? I didn't steal your socks.
Posted by: Nurse Tammy | February 14, 2007 at 03:45 PM
jessica r. i was born in stark co. grandpa stuffin died there in '05 at ault MC. willoman blvd. is named after my great-great grandpa.
Posted by: mudstuffin | February 14, 2007 at 03:50 PM
jessica r. also, in case you didn't know, judi herself (the S.B.) went to Kent State in the nineteen-diggities.
Posted by: mudstuffin | February 14, 2007 at 03:52 PM
Wow, mud, you're related to the "founding fathers". I am impressed. I exchanged email with judi several years ago about KSU. One of my best friends went to Kent about the same time as judi, but he was a geology major and not likely to have run into judi. Plus, he doesn't remember much about his college days IYKWIM!
Posted by: Jessica R. | February 14, 2007 at 04:11 PM
NT........I can see that evil grin from here!!
Posted by: Jazzzz | February 14, 2007 at 04:20 PM
Jessica: yeah, i was at kent about the same time too. i do KWYM.
Posted by: mudstuffin | February 14, 2007 at 04:23 PM
Valentine Poem Contest
These are entries to a Washington Post competition asking for a rhyme with the most romantic first line... but the least romantic second line:
Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss
But I only slept with you, because I was pissed.
I thought that I could love no other
Until, that is, I met your brother.
Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl's empty and so is your head.
Of loving beauty you float with grace
If only you could hide your face
Kind, intelligent, loving and hot;
This describes everything you are not.
I want to feel your sweet embrace
But don't take that paper bag off of your face.
I love your smile, your face, and your eyes
darn, I'm good at telling lies!
My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
marrying you screwed up my life.
I see your face when I am dreaming.
That's why I always wake up screaming.
My love, you take my breath away.
What have you stepped in to smell this way.
My feelings for you no words can tell,
except for maybe "go to hell"
What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime.
Posted by: Chaz | February 14, 2007 at 04:29 PM
Funny!
Posted by: Beppie | February 14, 2007 at 04:55 PM