SIGN OF THE APOCALYPSE

#874376987563498764349

(Thanks to Mike Zlotnick)

Comments

[The Dread Pirate Chris]

My dog can lick his own nads. He doesn't need a date.

[Chaz]

first on this friday!!!...happy friday

[Chaz]

ok...I will share with Chris. He is cool.

[PirateBoy]

The last time I tried this "service", they fixed me up with a real dog...

[Mot the Hoople]

I don't think I'm likely to find love in a doggy dating register. But hey whatever blows your hair back. BTW where's c-bol?

[mudstuffin]

true story- my dog humped my boss when he (my boss) came over for dinner with his wife.

[Teddy]

"Hello, my name is Teddy. I'm a young urban terrier, still with my original equipment, looking for a rowdy b!tch who likes long walks in the park at dusk and chasing the old balls around the bedroom at night. Call me.

[Meanie the Blue]

SWCM (Single White Canine Mutt), seeks SWCB for walks in the park, playful romps and occasional nights of moon-howling. Must be non-sniffer.

Lets hang out the car window together!

[Lairbo]

Can't post anything just now, I'm off to register the domain name "Am-I-in-Heat-Or-Not"?

[Hammond Rye]

Mud, I assume you have incriminating photos and comfortable employment security...

[KOW]

People clearly have way too much time and money on their hands. There are no words. At least none that I can find that aren't liberally sprinkled with profanities.

[Mot the Hoople]

2 poodles on a street corner, a terrier approaches. Poodle one says urgently. "Sit".
Poodle 2 "Huh?".
"I said sit, NOW!".
Poodle 2 sits obediently and terrier strolls by.
"What was that all about?" asks poodle 2 with a puzzled expression.
"That little shit has the coldest nose in town" poodle 1 explains.

[Clean Hands]

*snork* @ Lairbo.

What's sad is that there's probably a business model there. In the 90s, you probably could have gotten enough VC cash to buy at least two Jaguars bring it to fruition.

[Edgar Greenberg]

Not in Michigan. That's a Class 1 felony.

[pogo]

The problem is not finding a date for my dog, it's a matter of keeping him from finding his own.

[Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa]

Oh look, they have a scratch n sniff page. My dog will love that.

*not really, I just made that up*

[CJrun]

mud, congratulations on your raise!

Lairbo, don't forget b!tch.com.

[fivver]

I don't know, every girl they've set me up with has been a real b!tch.

[*Only Bitch in the House*]

I have two male dogs and they keep each other entertained. (I think they're gay.) (nttawwt)

[Mot the Hoople]

OBITH, you never know with dogs, I have a female jack russel who humps the head of my male border collie when he lays down.

[Siouxie]

and what's wrong with that??

[Siouxie]

oops! changed the name too quickly ;-)

[wxgurl]

My boy dogs wouldn't know what to do with a date. They are too busy romping (not literally) in the snow right now!

[Chaz]

Can't post anything just now, I'm off to register the domain name "Am-I-in-Heat-Or-Not"?

Posted by: Lairbo | 03:06 PM on January 19, 2007

snoooorkkkk

[Meditrina]

Must be Friday. The blog has gone to the dogs.

[Clean Hands]

It's ben a Frisky Friday all day, that's for sure. Sheesh.

[Christobol]

Wait, did I miss sign #874376987563498764348 ??

Dammit.

"Hi, I'm here to pick up Fluffy for the doggy date!"
"Very well. Where's your pet?"
"Uh, I didn't see anything that says I'm required to have one."

[Click Me]

well, do it!
this is why more dogs need dates.

[Christobol]

"Gosh, I hope Zipper and Fluffy hit it off."
"Oh I'm sure they will."
"Wow, he's already sniffing around the old, heh, well, hmmm."
"That's normal."
"Geeze! Would you look at that! He didn't even offer to buy her dinner! That's awesome! You go, Zipper!"

[CJrun]

We [me and my doggie date] interrupt this thread to announce that it's after 5pm in Hoopleville and that's good enough for us:

BlogBar's Open!

*sets out hot toddies for the blogsicles, ESBs, mojitos for the unfrozen, and butterflied shrimp*

[Meditrina]

Cbol, you were missed today.

[sthnbelle]

Gratefully accepting a hot toddy before I head out into the gale. Thanks, CJ

[Just Ducky]

Yay, I got here at the right time! Hot toddy, please, CJ, it's still too darn cold here!

I showed my border collie the website. He, of course, was quite critical of the webdesign and offered suggestions for modifications that would improve the site and attract more customers.

[mm]

Thanks CJ, but then hmmmm, it's always ater 5pm somewhere, so....

QQ: the blog always gets slow around now (east coast rush hour), and then when I can log on again around 9pm most of you are gone. Will anyone else be here after 9? I know: Most of you have lives...

[Meditrina]

CJ - Is the butterflied shrimp compliments of the Romanian surgeon? Or is it the peel and eat kind?

[mm]

oh Med, you just tainted the hors d'oevres

[Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa]

*snork* @ c-bol

Doggie Chatroom on dating web site:

Chow: “Ruff”
Poodle: “Ruff, ruff.”
Chow: “Bow wow.”
Poodle: “Yap yap.”
Chow: “Ciao.”
Poodle: “Arf revoir."

[sthnbelle]

mm, I'm sometimes lurking around that time, but my home computer is so darn slow that I can't post, so if I'm here, I'll wave to you.

But you won't know, so maybe not.

[Federal Duck]

"Yeah, I'm here for the doggy dating service"

"You're too hard on yourself, sir. A tan and some time at the gym and..."

"For the mutt, dude."

"OH! Well jump on up here big guy and let's have a look at ya!"

*whap*

"I meant the dog, sir."

"Righty. Here Lugnut. Jump!"

"There's a good bo...JEEZE, that breath could stun a yak at 30 paces!"

"He's not that bad."

"This time I really did mean you, sir."

"Oh, yeah. I'm trying to get the cat to stop farting in my mouth while I'm sleeping."

"I'll need you to leave now."

"Me or the dog?"

"...."

[Meditrina]

Sorry, mm. I couldn't help myself. Kinda like the Romanian surgeon.

I dont have a life, so unless I drink too many of CJs hot toddies get a phone call, I will be here after 9. See you then.

[Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa]

mm-I'm here a lot at time, but it's hit and miss, really.

[Clean Hands]

No, I think I tainted them when I snorked over them. Sorry 'bout that.

[Christobol]

Thanks med!

By the way, don't go looking for similar sites for cats. Or at least don't google under "pussy dating". You wouldn't BELIEVE the results.

[sthnbelle]

Snorking heartily at Fed.

Time to go collect the boy from school and begin the weekend with non virtual beverages (not that my hot toddy wasn't lovely, CJ)

Y'all be good!

[crossgirl]

trust me, there are plenty of dogs on the other online dating sites too.

[CJrun]

Owwww! Neither!
Step 1, go down to the docks when the boats get in.
Step 2, buy shrimp and carry 'em over to the cleaning table.
Step 3, pop de heads, peel 'em, run the knife down the back.
Step 4, drop the knife, scream, bleed.
Step 5, pull out de crap tubes.
Step 6, dip in egg/ milk, seasoned flour, fry hot and short.
Step 7, pop in yo' mouth, and faint from yummy or blood-loss.

*puts out another round with un-bandaged hand*

[sthnbelle]

CJ, when I lived in Charleston, we used to get shrimp that fresh. Nothin' like it!

And major snorks at your prep method.

Now go find a Band-Aid™, please, before you bleed all over the shrimp!

[Beppie]

You might wind up with a real bitch, though.

[Meditrina]

CJ - Where exactly are you bleeding? Your hand or your back?

Yummy shrimpers! Thanks for thinking of us land locked ice cubes.

[CJrun]

*SNORK* @ Fed!

[Clean Hands]

*snork* @ C-bol, over and over again.

[CJrun]

BTW, belle, Charleston is an old stomping ground of mine. I learned how to butterfly shrimp at a great place in Folly Beach!

[Siouxie]

LMAO @ C-bol!

[Stevie W]

Good place to fine a partner for ruff sex.

[Siouxie]

and find one too.

ruff ruff ;-P

[PirateBoy]

A variation on "Fractured Fairy Tales": Tune in next week for another episode of 'Doggone' or 'I can't believe that b!$ch left me!

[Stevie W]

"...and find one too."

It's not enuf for you to find a dog who can type? He's gotta be able to spell too?