GUYS TAKING ACTION

Example 2,038

(Thanks to Jon Harris)

Comments

[mm]

I was wondering wether he was using a toaster and some pop-tarts....

[Gadfly]

*looking in garage to see if he has these two products*

[Addicted to 24]

There is a Looney Toon somewhere in this story.

[The Dread Pirate Chris]

DON'T KILL BEES!!!
Bees have enough problems with the Veroa mite and Foul Brood that they don't need to have to deal with idiots with Raid cans. Call an api bee guy™ to come take them away instead.

/PSA

[Christobol]

Good thing it didn't burn the whole house down! That could have exceeded $900 in damages!

[Coconuts]

No self-respecting woman of the female persuasion would try something this stupid!

[From another world]

$500 damage - it must have been a double wide.

[Tweetywill]

I am highly disappointed that they don't list the exact mixture neccesary to turn the two ingredients into a flamethrower.

I mean, otherwise someone else may make the same mistake.

What is wrong with journalists today?

[A Guy Taking Action]

*dons cup, flame-proof suit and +2 shield of hot wax treatment protection

Of course no self-respecting woman of the female persuasion would try something this stupid. Women of the female persuasion are incapable of dealing with their own bugs.

[Siouxie]

Hmmm...A Piggot burning a house down.

coincidence? I think not

[MOTW]

I'll bet we see an Official Statement from Re@l Kill, WD-4O, and Se@rs Vinyl Siding.

[random thunking]

WD40 makes an awesome flamethrower, especially if you use that little red straw that comes taped to the side of the can. Not that I have had any experience with this, just sayin'.

*looks around innocently, hopes Dad is not read The Blog*

[big bad wolf]

Siouxie - they wouldn't even let me huff and puff!

[Dad]

Why is my WD-40 can empty already? I know I didn't use that much on my rusty nuts.

[mudstuffin]

"Of course no self-respecting woman of the female persuasion would try something this stupid. Women of the female persuasion are incapable of dealing with their own bugs."

C'mon Annie WBH, where's the outrage?

[mudstuffin]

BTW: totally cool and true WD40 story that i am not making up: last night a recliner in the back room became "stuck" - the little footrest deal would not come back down - so i turned the chair over and doused every metal part i could see with WD40 and the chair once more works like a charm. my wife (who was not in the room when i "fixed" the chair) was very impressed. score one for the good guys.

[mm]

The mysterious orient - did you notice this link alongside the story? We have some extreme tree hunters that might be interested...

[MOTW]

*shoves Guy TA aside*
Whaddya mean, incapable? I'll have you know that I have no fear, NONE, as long as I have my trusty crusty flyswatter!

[Clean Hands]

C'mon, Guy, you know that's not true. Women of the female persuasion have a keenly-honed strategy for dealing with all sorts of creepy-crawlies.

"Honeeeeeey!"

[Megan]

I hope the giant bunnies don't
read that article and get any ideas.
*runs away screaming*

[Siouxie]

*ahem*

I'm a woman of the female persuasion and I am NEVER without WD-40!

AND I kill my own bugs, thankyouverymucho!

*pfffttt*

[Suzy Q]

Vinyl siding? Really? Does that even exist anymore?

[The Dread Pirate Chris]

re mm's link:
The Phuket Gazette

snork

[Annie Where-but-here]

Yeah, what Siouxie said.
*pfffttt*

[mm]

ok please transfer that last post to the other thread.

[The Dread Pirate Chris]

re the overprotective bot:
Phuket You!!
[verb] my [noun]

[crossgirl]

megan, that wasn't a very good haiku....

[Just Ducky]

Redo of megan's haiku

Giant bunnies read
Article; they get ideas
*Runs away screaming*

[mm]

and on this topic, I'm a woman of the female persuasion and if I encounter a bug I take the bull by the horns and by myself, get the cat and sic her on it.

[qsman]

Do those guys read this blog? Didn;t our fearless leader post photos of this being done somewhere in Florida?

[jon]

Oh, Siouxie, you have no idea how it makes a man feel to hear that^^!

[Annie Where-but-here]

Any bugs found inside my house are first lectured about staying outside, then promptly flushed. If they can swim, they get to live.

True story - I was stacking hay in a field with my younger sister. She stepped on a wasp's nest and was swarmed, most of the wasps attacking the top of her head. I pinned her down and pulled the wasps off her head as fast as I could with my hands. She was very nice to me, for a little while.

[crossgirl]

bugs and wd40 are why i have sons.

[Siouxie]

I thought so, jon. Kinda compensates for the fact that I don't cook and hate to clean. I'm such the jewel!

[Dr. Doug]

Pictures, damnit, pictures!

[Hammond Rye]

Buying new cans of bug spray and WD-40 on the way home. Oh, yeah. Need to buy some bees, too.

[Annie Where-but-here]

Siouxie - I looked at it this way - occassional spider, or constant couch potato.

[mudstuffin]

our fearless leader
post photos of this somewhere
guys taking action

like seashells - surf sound
woman head - a shrill whining
man head - a dull thud

had toe surgery
taking percocet for "pain"
wonders - does it show?

[Clean Hands]

Percocet be tha good stuffin, mud. Woooooo!

[mudstuffin]

"occassional spider, constant couch potato"

Sounds like a good name for a movie, like "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon" or is that the percocet talking?

[mm]

mud - no. not at all.

[Just Ducky]

OT Alert:

Some of you are aware that my favorite brother-in-law ended up in ICU earlier this week and required heart surgery. Yesterday, a successful QUINTUPLE bypass was performed, and so far, he's doing well. I'm headed back to the hospital now. Thanks to all who offered their prayers and good thoughts.

Mud, hope you're up dancin' again soon!

/End OT

[Siouxie]

oh absolutely, Annie! I got rid of THAT slug a long time ago!

without WD-40 ;-)

[Siouxie]

YAY Ducky!!!!

I still have that last piece of cheesecake for him (minus ONE little bite).

[Clark Kent]

The other day my girlfriend (brave soul that she is) took it upon herself to stomp a spider that was crawling across the kitchen floor.

Only problem was that it was a female spider carrying about 100 little spiders who proceeded to scatter in a swarm.

THEN she calls for me. Actually, she started screaming incoherently, but it had the same effect.

I THINK I got all the little buggers, but it was WAY creepy. And I told her to leave the spider killing to me.

[Clean Hands]

((((Just Ducky))))

And *SNORK* @ Clark Kent's mama spider. She taught y'all a good lesson there, didn't she?

[Siouxie]

Clark!! you killed Charlotte!!

[The Dread Pirate Chris]

So it seems that girls can kill their own bugs, but do it so incopentently that we don't want them to do it and screw it up. Seems fair, since I use the same strategy with laundry.

[crossgirl]

willing to trade dpc a clean load of clothes for some squashed bugs. do you do tree frogs too?

[The Dread Pirate Chris]

"incopentently" ??!!?
and I'm NOT on percocet

[Siouxie]

*wonders why guys can't spell incompetently*

[KDF]

*adds a pffffffft to the pile*

I, too, enjoy the flushing approach. It's fun to watch a bug enjoy a last swim, especially since it doesn't know what's about to happen. This is extra fun with a turbo flush toilet.

{{{Just Ducky and her BIL}}}

Mud, it does my heart good to see you haikuing again.

*sniff*

[Clean Hands]

What do you mean by "do" tree frogs, cg?

Eww, ew, ewwwwww. Sometimes it really stinks, having an overactive imagination roaming free in a dirty mind.

[Punkin Poo]

A bee once flew up my 2 yr old daughter's shorts...and of course, her first instinct was to slam her legs together - thusly causing the trapped bee to sting her in the crotch.

Her screams shattered windows for 3 miles around.

[mudstuffin]

(reads souixie's comment and goes into trance-like state)

[Clean Hands]

Ouch, punkin - that made me slam my legs together... which resulted in a scream that startled dogs for three miles around.

[mudstuffin]

punkin - for a comment that is really not funny, that's pretty damn funny.

[Tweetywill]

Hmm... Spider Swarm

WBAGNFARB?

[Punkin Poo]

Mud - As my daughter is now nearly 20, I tried to use the experience to bring home the point that she should ALWAYS keep her legs together and never let anything up there again.

No, it didn't work.

[crossgirl]

ch: ewwwwwwwwwww, ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww, ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. as if i was revolted enough by them. ickickickickick.

[The Dread Pirate Chris]

There are certain Frogs I would 'do' in a tree. My wife being one of them.

[mudstuffin]

perhaps the humor
is most keenly seen in this:
mud has lots to do

big pile of papers
voice mails, emails, hot deadline
mud smiles, writes haiku

like scrooge on christmas
i just don't give a good shit
for the right reasons

[Annie Where-but-here]

((((JD & BIL)))) Did he like his birthday songs? A quintuple bypass? I didn't know a heart had that many. Sounds like the freeway system around DC. I hope he got a quantity discount.

[Annie Where-but-here]

Mud's toe surgery
Quit kicking yourself, Buckeye
Season's over now.

[KDF]

My friend Steve, who is a high-energy, very funny but tightly-wound type, had the bee in the shorts problem a few years ago.

He was outside, enjoying a warm summer day, doing yardwork, when a bee made its presence known in his shorts. He burst in through the front door, screaming incoherently, jumping up and down while swatting at his pants, then dropped trou right there in the entryway.

His teenaged son watched Steve dance and scream and rip his clothes off without knowing about the bee issue and deadpanned, "Dad, you have GOT to relax."

[Clean Hands]

*SNORK* @ Steve's son!

[mm]

CH - remember "a (dirty) mind is a terrible thing to waste"...

[Clean Hands]

Now I've gone and pissed off the bot. *sigh* I was having such a nice morning, sharing my twisted imaginings with cg.

[mudstuffin]

the chubby buddha
says 'what is this football?'
enlightened by drugs

acted like twit
just now with clerical staff
laughed at my own joke

really do have work
pressing - ignoring no good
i am the fly guy

[Stevie W]

I'll bet you never actually saw the bee.

[Stevie W]

KDF -

I'll bet you never actually saw the bee.

(Too many messages crept in between there).

[Annie Where-but-here]

Mud - work quickly now
Percocet is your excuse
To be really wrong.

[Stevie W]

"...the bee in the shorts problem..."

Mine have a fly.

[Annie Where-but-here]

Anyone who dries their clothes on a clothesline, beware - wasps can crawl into pants and surprise you when you put them on the next day. Yes, I'm speaking from experience. Owie.

[mm]

med & stevie - you really don't want to be making statements like that - you may have masterminds like Mr. Piggott coming after your pants with WD-40. Just sayin'

[mm]

u,
mud, sorry

[mudstuffin]

the fly guy:

http://www.trevorvanmeter.com/flyguy/

[Meditrina]

mm - I have been lurking silently today. Not sure what I shouldn't have said?

DPC: I have kissed my share of toads, but I don't know if I could DO one.

[mm]

med- see correction 1:15 above, sorry. A the risk of leaving myself wide open, I am a *ahem* hunt and peck typist.

[queensbee]

ow. and i am sorry to hear about your rusty nuts. hope that improves.

[crossgirl]

you know, women, precollagen era, have been known to force bees to sting their lips for that fuller look. wonders if this may be why men are allowing bees into their britches.

[Clean Hands]

cg, I avoided going there. I'm so proud of you, though. :o)

[Annie Where-but-here]

"rusty nuts?" That explains the sound I heard. I thought he was just wearing corduroys.

[dr. crossgirl]

wonders if there may be a career in this for me. wouldn't take much bankroll to set up a couple bee hives. would take even less to convince men with inadequacy issues to sign up for "treatments".

[Siouxie]

"balltox"

[dr. crossgirl]

balltox would take the wrinkles out,
how about if i just call them ballagen treatments.

[KDF]

*snork*

[Siouxie]

perfect! I'll try to scout some suckers potential patients, cg!

[dr. crossgirl]

i'll pay a birdog fee to all blogchics who encourage men to seek treatment! this is gonna make us all rich!!!

[The Dread Pirate Chris]

Put an add on CraigsList. Guaranteed that there are guys into willing to try that.

[dr. crossgirl]

you know dpc, i was thinking that. as amusing as i may find it, there actually are plenty of guys willing to submit pay for this.

[The Dread Pirate Chris]

If you sting, they will cum.

Unfunny
Bee stings are supposed to be good treatment for either MS or MD (I can't remember which).
/Unfunny

[dr. crossgirl]

*snork* and eeeeeeeeeew.
i can probably get a higher price for wearing the naughty nurse outfit.

they're supposed to be good for arthritis too. the bee stings, not the naughty nurse outfits although i'm willing to give that a try too.

[The Dread Pirate Chris]

Just make them clean up their own mess. And you could definitely get more with the nurse outfit.

You could do 'real' treatments for MD (looked it up) and arthritis during the day, and 'special' treatments at night.

[Mott the Hoople]

Naughty nurse outfits cure most things.

[crossgirl]

pity i'm a skeered of beeses.

[Gadfly]

Naughty tigger suits cure all others

[Annie Where-but-here]

crossgirl - don't use bees. Use one of the lip-enlarging creams. I'm sure they'd pay a ton for housecalls!

[Bob]

I had a boss who told me about the time he tried to destroy an underground hornets nest near his house by pouring gasoline into it and tossing in a match.

This confirmed he was a moron. I don't miss him.

[ronald]

wd40 is said to kill bees on contact but one thing i do know is that as soon as you get stung by a bee, spider, centerpede, anything that painfully bites or stings jellyfish too. use wd40 and spray on the bee or anything that bites you on the spot. it will instantly take away the pain faster then anything in the past. may even cure snake bites use it on your body may stop shark atacks. i got stung by a bee and god did it hurt, sprayed wd40 on it took the pain away but spray it imidietly or else continue every 5 minutes, you can see the bubbles on the wounds. my brother was bitten last night by a scorpion and suffered badly till my mom said use wd40 he did and the pain was instantly gone. im not sure though but may stop bad burns from fire fire works and so on