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January 30, 2007

ALL THE NEWS THAT'S FIT TO PRINT

(Thanks to Ian Clark)

Comments

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Wait - are you a sports writer, too??

That's just Euseless.

I would say this is as exciting as the news in my tiny hometown, but my hometown didnt have a newspaper.

Dear God, I do NOT want to know what he was using the ashtray and towels for while sitting in his car for a long time.

I think this falls under the categoty of "Constabulary Notes From All Over" a la E.B. White

uh..he can keep the towels.

/not so funny
A body was found yesterday behind a hotel in my little town. if it turns out to be a murder it will be the first one in over 40 years
/end not so funny

The great criminal minds of Texas... I blame Kinky Friedman's run for Governor.

I'm willing to bet he left the Morman bible behind.

Smart of him not to take the bedspread either.

ubetcha it was stuck to the sheets.

I'm not gonna register just to see it. The guy's name wasn't Norman, was it?

With news of this magnitude, you would think they would include a video so that we can all memorize the features of this heinous criminal lest he strike again.

ewww fivver! and be VERY careful when going to those "no tell" motels.

A thief took two cotton towels, two hand towels....

A terry-ble crime.

not me Souxie! I've got a wife who would make my life a living hell and a (lady) pastor who would guarantee the real one!

Was that story fabricated out of whole cloth, or just a slooow news day in Ft. Worth? If so, I wash my hands of all the Mclatchy papers. Besides, what kind of crime reporting is that in Texas anyway where they have a MAP to the motel where a couple of towels were stolen? OK, OK I throw in the towel - let's wipe the slate clean and begin again. Was he master of his own domain or just a mere sock puppet?

"A police report did not have the dollar loss in the theft."

I'm betting that's a slightly mangled quote and they really were saying it was a dollar (singular) loss.

Someone should forward this article to the 24 writers. More action here than there.

do you suppose the cops set up a perimeter to nab the towel thief?

...for a Motel 6 that WAS a heinous crime ! Stealing over half the value of the motel is pretty serious.

Total value of items stolen: 57 cents.

Motel 6 is no longer able to leave the light on for you. It was stolen.

"A thief took two cotton towels, two hand towels..."

Motel Six has towels made of hand?

That's just sick.

I couldn't believe they actually printed that. Must have been a heck of a slow day.

/not so funny
A body was found yesterday behind a hotel in my little town. if it turns out to be a murder it will be the first one in over 40 years
/end not so funny

Wow 40 years. I wish i could say the same. Philadelphia had almost 400 homocides last year. You gotta love the city life.

Having once worked as night audit and desk Clerk at the Braintree Mass Motel Six. They take the towel situation very serious, we were supposed to make note of how many items we delivered to the rooms after the house keeping staff left for the day, They were charged for any items that weren't there after check out. Oh, and I lost my job there, I forgot to leave the light on.

"braintree"?

Hey wait a minute! I sent that! Plagerist!

I'm Mr. Completely, and I'll leave the seat up for ya.

http://www.motel6.com/reservations/motel_detail.asp?MotelId=1057&NOA=&aYr=&aMo=&aDa=&dYr=&dMo=&dDa=&BTR=M6ProximityResults.aspx?searchtype=AD&CP=&TA=&redi=

Art - and Philly also had the unhappy distinction of having the highest number of black men murdered last year in the US. Sad. Sometimes it's worst to be first.

When are they going to start arresting people for stealing ketchup and splenda packets at Dennny's?

Rodney Dangerfield: "I went to Vegas and lost $5,000 gambling. I got even, though - I swiped 300 Sweet & Lows (&;)."

When are they going to start arresting people for stealing ketchup and splenda packets at Dennny's?
If you are spending time at Denny's, your life is being stolen from you, a minute at a time.

I'm actually reading this while sitting in a H!lton Garden Inn room. (Haven't run into Her Skankiness Paris yet).

I'm looking around the room to see what I'm willing to go to prison for...perhaps the coffee maker that makes 1.5 ounces of coffee...nah. Gideon Bible? Nope. Hair dryer with 4" cord? Don't think so. Towels made of 80 grit sandpaper? Uh-uh.

Unfunny/

Since I stay in hotels about 40 weeks a year I travel with my own toiletries (packed in a quart sized transparent zip lock bag, of course). I DO take the little ones from the hotel (every day so they have to restock me) and give them to our local women's shelter. Many women and children have to escape their homes at a moment's notice and don't have time to bring any. I highly recommend this practice to anyone who travels.

resume jokularity/

My husband brings me shower caps from his business trips. *wonders if his picture is up at the post office*

I had to couble check to make sure that this wasn't an "Onion" story.

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