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October 23, 2006

WHY WE NEED GUYS

Guys have confidence in technology.

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That's what the idiot gets for askin' directions.

A few years ago, okay many years ago, when automobiles started switching from gauges to warning lights in the dash we called them idiot lights.

Is this just idiot light technology?

ummm, no. that's not why i need guys.
but one described as overly obedient certainly has my interest. wonders if he's got some sons.

I've seen drive-thru's where you can get food to put into your digestive track. I've never seen a drive-thru where you let it back out when you are finished with it.

The overly obedient 53-year-old from Freiburg drove his sport utility vehicle off the road onto into a building site, up a stairway and into the small toilet shack, police in the eastern town of Rudolstadt said on Sunday.

Must not have heard the command to Stop!

Did anybody else think "Could it be...Satnav?"

No?

OK.

And he'll have fun! fun! fun!
Till his daddy takes the Satnav a-wa-a-ay!

Louis and Clark, and Jim Bridger never used satnav. 'course anywhere they went, they could just claim to be explorin'. I explore a lot.

It was probably a lo-flow PortaPotty.

I dunno. I don't claim to be the best driver in the world, but I think I would have clued in at least by the time I was driving up the staircase.

This guy really needs a Florida drivers license.

It had to be a German. I bet his defence was that he "was only following orders".

he wasnt clued in by the stairs?? um, maybe he thought his invincible suv was supposed to do stairs. IDJIT!

*just sitting here wishing for one of these "overly obedient" males to come live at my house (I have a husband and 2 sons - no one listens to ME!)*

Neither my husband, father or father in law would ever use something like this because real men don't ever ask for directions. I actually never thought that any male type person ever asked for directions. Guess I was wrong, and just look what happens. Who knew that all those male persons were correct?

I wonder if after the crash, SATNAV said, "I can see that you're upset, Dave..."

New command programmed into Satnav per corporate legal counsel:

"The next available right turn could possibly be suitable for reaching your destination, however, this is merely a potential suggestion and is in no way purported to represent the optimal pathway. Satnav assumes no responsibility for the consequences, or the lack thereof, express or implied, of following this potential suggestion. Please consult a qualified cartographer for further guidance, while we transition to an offshore corporate address. Thank you."

I also have a husband and two sons...I'd love an obedient male.

And being from the land of Pizza Hut---I'm really glad we don't have small (or large) Toilet Huts!

It must have been a womans voice on the satnav...and the driver panicked...thinking his wife was yelling at him yet again...

My 4yr old granddaughter gets REALLY upset when I proceed AFTER a stop sign. She feels that I should just remain STOPPED until the sign says GO.

She'll make a great cult member some day.

I was thinkin' the same thing, Chaz. I just didn't wanna get hit with a flyin' shoe or sumpthin'. Thanks for fallin' on the sword.

*throws shoes at Chaz and Blurk*

you are soooo bad Dr Acula. And since he was 'just following orders' he felt no remorse. Isn't it so much easier when someone else is responsible?

This is why I will not get my parents a GPS system when I give them their new Laptop in December. She would do that. Oh, and they already have Florida drivers licenses.

'just following orders' ...that PROVES he is married

I followed you into battle once, Chaz.

You're on your own this time.

don't be silly Chaz and blurk. it wouldn't really be much fun if you actually listened to us. that way when you do actually listen and follow our directions, we are so pleasantly surprised. don't get carried away with it. once a year or so should be enough to keep us on our toes. i don't know any woman (married or just living in sin) that expects her man to follow orders or even our suggestions.

WW, depends on the order. For instance, if I were to hear, "blurk, load that cooler full of beer and get down to the lake with your buddies!! And don't you dare come home until you're good and ready!!" I would most certainly follow that order to the letter.

Just sayin.

i don't know any woman (married or just living in sin) that expects her man to follow orders or even our suggestions....Posted by: wickedwitch | 11:00 AM on October 23, 2006

whatwhatWHAT?!?!

wickedwitch...meet Mrs Chaz....Mrs Chaz..wait, honey, wait...I...no...but....I was not flirting....but... (chaz ducks shoe)

come on now, what fun is it to have someone follow your orders all the time. had one of those and after 20 years, had to just let it go. if i didn't tell him what to do all the time, he'd ask me what he should do. i expect my guy to be his own man, make his own decisions and of course, his own mistakes. what fun is "I told you so", if they don't screw up on their own. kinda boring otherwise.

i always expect my men to follow orders. i am often disappointed.

Actually, I have some sympathy for the man. Satnavs can get really shirty if you disobey their instructions. I took a short cut in London once and the satnav went into a complete huffy silence until we rejoined the proper route, when she suddenly snapped "At the end of the road, turn right out of this UNAUTHORISED route".
It is the first time I have ever been bawled out by a stupid machine.
The fact that the voice was a snotty BBC-type female is entirely coincidental. I think....

truthfully we have found a happy balance. Its just SOME days of the month I have to be particularly careful to LISTEN and FOLLOW correctly.

*straps on her kickass boots*

just. in. case.

Oh, Chaz, you did NOT just go there!

Also, big SNORKS to Punkin and Meanie.

Chaz - I'll get you back on this. Mrs. Dread often tries to provide helpful advice while I'm driving. Conversation snippit:
Her: "If you turn right, I know a shortcut to ..."
Me: "OK. Turn where?"
Her: "That street you just passed."
Me: "Nice timing Dear."

Chaz - I'll get you back on this. Mrs. Dread often tries to provide helpful advice while I'm driving. Conversation snippit:
Her: "If you turn right, I know a shortcut to ..."
Me: "OK. Turn where?"
Her: "That street you just passed."
Me: "Nice timing Dear."

Also there's that whole male / female language translation thing. Mrs. Dread will ask me to "deal with the trash". By trash, she means the bag of fermenting whatnot in the can in the kitchen. I, however, translate "trash" to mean pizza boxes and beer cans that need to be emptied of their contents before being carried to the curb.

Just this weekend, the Mr. was rootling around the pots and pans, I asked his what he was looking for. He didn't answer. After a few more minutes of noise, I asked again. He snapped "You're not my mother! I don't need you to find things for me!" (I hear all you gals sucking in air and waiting for the punchline.) Sunday afternoon when we were driving around Oklahoma City looking for a certain business, he finally said "Crap! Do you know where this place is?" Yeah. I said it. It's good to be the Queen.

I love it when my wife tells ME where to turn on the drive home...yes, just like Bill Engval on Blue Collar...

and YES, I DID go there. If you women want us to acknowledge your monthly and treat you more gingerly...then I will point it out. Cant have it both ways women...

Dr. Acula - London driving sounds like fun with that satnav...

*takes two Mydol and kicks Chaz in da butt*

oops...sorry...it's that hormone thing ;)

Yes dear, I went to the golf course and to the liquor store but I swear the Satnav made me do it.

Chaz - How is it that women can produce ONE EGG PER MONTH and get all p!ssy about it? Guys produce about 250000000 sperm PER DAY. Do we cop a 'tude?

Chris, it takes that many to try to get ONE to make it to our egg without asking for directions ;)

as you well know...most turn the wrong way!

"*takes two Mydol and kicks Chaz in da butt*

oops...sorry...it's that hormone thing ;)"

The prosecution rests.

Ah, but without us women, there is nowhere for those sp*rm to go. Thus, we still hold the keys to the castle where incidentally I just vacuumed the rugs so stop driving your friggin suv up them! I don't care what the machine told you.

*takes another Midol*

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