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October 31, 2006

TRULY EXCELLENT NAME FOR A ROCK BAND

Two Tons of Pig Heads

(A big oink of thanks to Claire Martin)

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Determined to be FIRST today 'cause I'm pigheaded.

I'm sure the firemen were THRILLED. Because this is the exact sort of thing they signed on for. The pinup calendar possibilties...

shudders with lord of the flies imagery.

It took the fire service...an hour-and-a-half to load the heads back onto the truck.

the heads were on fire?

flamin pig heads

rut roh...here we go again..with the Posts from the Future.

*cranks up theme from Twilight Zone*

du du du du du du du du

I guess there'll be a dearth of head cheese in Ruhr until they recover from this tragic loss.

I was born one mornin' when the sun didn't shine
Picked up a shovel and I walked to the mine
I hauled Two Big Tons of severed pig heads
And the straw-boss said, "Them things are dead"

You haul Two Big Tons, whadaya get?
Another older and deeper in debt
Saint Peter don't you call me cause I can't go
I owe my soul to the company store

Oh my God, that must have been horrific.

I rented a house one time, out in the country, and one thing we asked for in the final inspection before we moved in was that the severed cow head on top of the pump house be removed. (I guess that the prior occupants were trying for a cow skull?)

When we moved in, the cow head was still there, facing the sky, drying in the hot sun. We were not charmed, and called the landlady to remind her that we wanted the head removed.

As we drove home the next day, there, alongside the road, was the dessicated cow head, still looking skyward, apparently having fallen off of her truck.

As far as I know, it's still there, waiting to hitch a ride on some unsuspecting soul's bumper - or on the roof of their pump house.

ISIANMTU.

Oh great, visions of "Carrie" and the pigs now. Thanks, Dave. You're a bundle of fun this morning!!

Why are they hauling away severed pigs heads? Didn't we just recently learn that they can be buried in ditches or blowed up real good or lots of other creative things? No reason to load em up and move em out!

We were not charmed, and called the landlady to remind her that we wanted the head removed.

And yes, this is a sentence one hopes never to have to type in the English language...

The driver didn't know it, but he was pig-headed for trouble that day. :o

casey - head 'em up move 'em out

Rollin, Rollin, Rollin,
Keep those pig heads rollin!
Or soon they'll all be swollen - decomp!
Them oinkers won't be wakin'
Too bad they can't be bacon
Bacon, just waitin' for my chow

Rollin' out, scoop 'em up
Scoop 'em up, rollin' out
Rollin' out, scoop 'em up
Decomp!

Okay.......blog warp is on again I see!

With apologies to Loudon Wainright III...

Pig heads in the middle of the road
Pig heads in the middle of the road
Pig heads in the middle of the road
Oinkin to high heaven

Well they shoulda looked left
And they shoulda looked right
Given half a chance they shouda
eaten right

But they porked up on slop
And then they lost their heads
The skinny ones all are back home
Safe in their beds

Pig heads in the middle of the road
Pig heads in the middle of the road
Pig heads in the middle of the road
Oinkin to high heaven

They knew that someday they'd prolly
Lose their feet
But they never thought their heads
Would wind up In the street

The trucker who spilled 'em
Looked back all agog
He'd never intended to
Be a road hog

Pig heads in the middle of the road
Pig heads in the middle of the road
Pig heads in the middle of the road
Oinkin to high heaven

where exactly were the pigs' heads headed? and why? inquiring minds, of never mind.

Ummmm......my 11:45 post was in response to casey's 12:38. Spooky Halloween stuff.

bloodyhands - was it the old O'Keeffe place?

movin' movin' movin'
their smell is not improvin'
while the flies are groovin'
pig heads!

don't think about it often
just drivin' those schwein-kopfen
i'll forget about the stink in just a year

load 'em up, dump 'em out , pick 'em up, sell 'em off
pork heads!
steam 'em up, spice 'em down, dye 'em good, grill 'em up, hot dogs!

*did not see motw's song*
*time to retire*

Bring it on!!!! I love ya'lls songs!

MOTW, my 12:02 is in response to your 12:48. This is killin me. I'm gonna have to drink some tequila before these comments start making sense to me.

"Pig heads
Pig heads,
Rolly, polly pig heads"

*stands up straight*

*puts hands behind back*

*clears throat*

*screams FFFFIIIIIRRRRRSSSSTTTTTT!*

hey, the way this blog is rearranging, it's worth a try right?

Pretty soon my present ME will run past my future ME...


*Lets do the Time Warp..AGAIN*

Make that my "future" ME that was actually my "past" ME...

*brain implodes*

ok..it works now! OINKS!!!

*Snork @ MOTW

I predict casey will have those pig heads rollin' at about 12:38.

Pig heads, pig heads,
rolly poly pig heads;
Pig heads, pig heads,
eat 'em up, yum.

(smiles from her cell)

I just had my 4 yr old granddaughter play "Compare the pictures" with Nannie. Eardrums now bleeding from high pitched screams.

*evil Nannie*

Rollin, Rollin, Rollin,
Keep those pig heads rollin!

MOTW - you really ought to thank casey for the muse-nudge.

I think 12:48 would be a good time.

thanks for the muse-nudge, casey

I love playing with time....makes me feel all Hogwarty. *goes to get magical CompoundW ™*

Hot Dog!!

sounds like I missed some fun.

We've all been porkin' eachother, Wyo.

Okay, this is certainly harder to follow, but the slightly-higher-than-normal level of incoherence is more than compensated for by the hillarity that results. :-)

I love it when the blog is playing time shuttle!

*scrounging thru doing safety check on Granddaughter's candy - confiscates dangerous looking Charleston Chew*

I get the feeling those pig heads were headed to the sausage factory. Ugh. Bratwurst anyone?

That there Milky Way™ looks suspicious to me, Punkin.

Is there a two-second rule on pig heads?

Punkin' send me any suspicious Reese Cups (TM thingy) and I'll subject them to my rigid forensic analysis.

P-Poo, I find Mydol (TM thingy) works well when I'm sufferin from that Hogwarty feeling.

Layzee, I swear your comment wasnt there when I posted mine. Thats my story and I'm stickin to it.

I'm with ya, casey, that's why I responded to yours.

Clean Hands, this story is for you: someone with a real 'head' for business.

they coulda loaded them faster if they used pitchforks.

bleh- grossed myself out a little. I'm still twitching from the screaming demon.

That must have been quite a sight in the driver's Ruhr view mirror.

At least it didn't happen in Ham-burg.

Mmmmmmmmm...Barbeque....

This piggie head made bacon.
This piggie head made links.
This piggie head made kielbasa.
This piggie head made brats.
And this piggie head made a mess, mess, mess, all over the road.

Who let the pig-snout?

who who who who let the pig snout

lol

can everyone pleeeeese check your computer time...

1:57 pm et

1:59

11:58 AM Mountain.

Howdy Doody time

It's Howdy Doody Time
It's Howdy Doody Time

Ti-i-i-ime is on my side
Yes it is!

Time keeps on slippin slippin slippin
Into the future

Tick tock tick
Doot doot dootoo

It's time to get a new blog clock.

Time's fun when you're having flies. (Kermit the Frog)

This little piggy went out to paarrrrttaaayyyyy!!

No pig heads were harmed in the making of this blog.

11:19 PST

*thinks Dave forgot to wind the clock*

Yucky Halloween Joke time!

*These jokes brought to you from Mrs. Crabapple's 4th grade class*

What's worse than a truck load of dead babies?

A live one on the bottom eating it's way out.

_____________

How did the dead baby cross the road?

Stapled to the chicken!

How did the punkin cross the lake?

She used her outgourd motor.

D'OH!

MMmnnnmmmmnnnnnnnmmmmmmm...........

What is a skeleton's favorite musical instrument?
A trombone...

*notices comment counter is broken* This blog need to go to the shop.

Bring it on!!!! I love ya'lls songs!
Posted by: casey | 12:02 PM on October 31, 2006

Darlin', anytime you wanna use y'all, you can siddle on over here next to me.

What did the bride of Frankenstein say when Dracula flirted with her?

"Sorry, I'm not that kind of ghoul."

MOTW 1:28, thanks, I think, for that story.

Chaz, the problem isn't with the posters' clocks - the time for the blog posts is managed by the Web server(s) on which it lives. I'm guessing that there are several servers that share the load, and one or more of those has been incorrectly adjusted for the end of daylight savings time.

Maybe the driver was soused..

Oh ok...then everyone tell you servers to adjust the clocks

Chaz 3:00 - If they do, will we tip them at least 17.5%?

"not that kind of ghoul..." *snork*

MOTW, cant help it, I'm a country gal in a big city. I have to be all professional and gramatically correct at work all day, and coming to blog makes me feel comfy and at home and find myself reverting to my country hick accent!

Punkin- What's the best gift for a dead baby?

A dead puppy!

Ninth!

Or is the counter thingy broken again? Someone have Dave call from India- or something.

WEll it seems that just mentionng India fixes it.

OK, OK, I got one:

A modest man was in the hospital for a series of tests, the last of which had left his bodily systems extremely upset. Upon making several false alarm trips to the bathroom, he decided the latest episode was another and stayed put. He suddenly filled his bed with diarrhea and was embarrassed beyond his ability to remain rational. In a complete loss of composure he jumped out of bed, gathered up the bed sheets, and threw them out the hospital window. A drunk was walking by the hospital when the sheets landed on him. He started yelling, cursing, and swinging his arms violently trying to get the unknown things off, and ended up with the soiled sheets in a tangled pile at his feet. As the drunk stood there staring down at the sheets, a hospital security guard, who had watched the whole incident, walked up and asked, "What the heck is going on here?"
The drunk, still staring down replied: "I think I just beat the sh!t out of a ghost."

Happy Halloween! Booga booga booga

What is The Mummy's favorite type of music?

Wrap

What do you call wicken that lives at the beach?

A sandwitch

*Sends strongly worded note to server. Warns them Chaz has had it up to here with them.*

Why wouldn't the skeleton BOOgie at the party?

He had no body to dance with

Should I keep on going?

*SNORK @ casey*

Still laughing.

Living Fools
Two men were walking home after a night in the tavern and decided to take a shortcut
through the cemetery to get to their homes quicker. In the middle of the cemetery
they were startled by a tap-tap-tapping noise coming from the misty shadows.
Trembling with fear, they found an old man with a hammer and chisel,
chipping away at one of the headstones.

"Good gracious, Sir," one of them said after catching his breath,
"You scared us half to death -- we thought you were a ghost!
What are you doing working here so late at night?"

"Those fools!" the old man grumbled. "They misspelled my name!"

One especially for Wyo & blurk:
Why did the game warden arrest the ghost?

He didn't have a haunting license.

They picked up two tons of pigs' heads in an hour and a half?

Doesn't sound kosher.

Three vampires walk into a bar. The waitress comes up to them and asks them what they'll have.
The first vampire says, (Transylvanian accent inferred) "I'll have a glass of O Positive."
The second vampire says, "I'll have a glass of AB Negative." The third vampire says, "I'm the designated driver. I'll just have a glass of plasma."
The waitress turns toward the bartender and yells, "Gimme two bloods and one blood lite!"

what time is it, you ask?

*looks at clock*

2:37 CDT

which means...beer thirty!

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He had no guts.

Thanks, ec.
Speaking of h(a)unting I have a question for the bloglits. Do you have to have a license to shoot kids targets with one of them candy guns from the other thread?

My...um...buddy wants to know.

WeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeEEEEEEE!

Blurk,
Go for it. I'm good for the bail.
ec

Trailer, a-sail it went.
Ruhr got sped, piggies sent.
No limit autobahn
Now it's got some schweinflesch on

I say
Go call the lift mit fork
Help me lift two tons pork
I'm a mensch with meat by my feet
Pig on the road.

blurk--this is why we scare the beejezuz out of them--no one presses charges.

Its like 11 degrees here tonight. My little vampire is going to resemble the Pillsbury Dough Boy ™.

So a skeleton walks up to the bartender and says "Gimme a beer...and a mop"

Giant SNORK and a pkg of size "extra slim" Depends to AFKAT!

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