« Previous | Main | Next »

September 27, 2006

WHAT DO THEY CALL IT

...When the perp pretends to be the victim?

(Thanks to Guin)

UPDATE: As if we needed more evidence.

(Thanks to Flash Sheridan)

Comments

Feed You can follow this conversation by subscribing to the comment feed for this post.

Cute and furry my ___. It's a Hairy Tailed Tree Rat is what it is.

They do taste goo, though.

"squirrels behaving badly" of course, wbagnfarb

"squirrels behaving badly"

Limited time only with this special tv offer...

Bloody squirrel stole my D.

So this probably constitutes what is known as "squirrely" behavior!

Mmm, slush es. I love slush es. Especially grape flavored slush es.

Anyway, don't we already have a show called Squirrels Behaving Badly? What? "GIRLS Behaving Badly"? oh. Never mind...

While golfing with a Major in the Reserves
To a creek bed my banana ball curved
I slipped on wet grass
pulled a squirrel out my ass
So my dignity, at least was preserved

Squirrels Behaving Badly is the one where Snoop Dog gets them to flash their nuts at the camera, right?

I dunno, we had geese, swans, and 'overly-friendly' squirrels on my campus too, but I was more afraid of the swans. Evil they are!

Wouldn't you squirrel handle a squirel, not manhandle?

And yes, Little Andy, that squirrel WAS trying to eat you.

Squirrels, Pokras said, can become accustomed to humans as a food source

O M G


It's usually the other way around, isn't it?
Where's my stew pot?

"...she plans to seek reimbursement for Andrew's medical expenses from the city..."

Uh, lady, HOWINHELL IS IT THE CITY'S FAULT THAT A SQUIRREL (NOT UNDER THEIR CONTROL) ATTACKED YOUR KID???

Gimme gumball. Grrrrr....

A randy young cowboy named Earl
was having no luck with the girls
he over-embibed
and staggered outside
and then fed his nuts to the squirrels

Is this a bad time to mention that a class project once in one of my Biology courses was feeding squirrels peanuts and observing their behavior? I'm an accessory!

Squirrels are worse than pitbulls (which are banned in Miami-dade County)

lets ban squirrels too!

When squirrels are outlawed, only outlaws will have squirrels.

fault lies quite literally in the hands of humans who feed the animals everything from ``French toast to french fries."

So the real cause of the problem is... France?

``My mommy said the squirrel sneaked down behind me and he was hugging me, but when he kissed me it was really a scratch,'' he recalled Monday. ``I fell down, and he fell on me, and . . . and he's still on, and yeah, he was crazy. I don't know what he was trying to do.''

Something's fishy or squirrely...sounds like the mother is trying to influence the witness little boy..

behaving badly
rodents assault innocence
the children scream so

rodent? no matter
throw the bastard on the grill
critter BBQ

snoop dogg fo' shizzle
show me your nut sac (don't puke)
go wild, my squizzle

What exactly is there between French toast and French fries?

Holy cr@p. They really DO look at us as a food source.

and he keeps telling everyone the squirrel was trying to eat him

Now I'm definitely going to Idaho (where a Google search shows that there have been NO squirrel problems).

Why do I now have Mississippi Squirrel Revival stuck in my head???

Next we'll have "Squirrels Gone Wild" with those little critters flashing bazoomage and boozing it up in Cancun...

it COULD happen...

"At the park Tuesday evening, Ping Ping Kuo of Los Altos said she's seen squirrels jump into strollers..."

I thought Ping Ping Kuo was what Chinese kids play instead of duck duck goose.

lol stevie

I come home in the morning light
My mother says "did you attack that little boy tonight?"
No mother dear, I'm not the one
And squirrels they want to have fun
Oh squirrels just want to have fun

The phone rings in the middle of the night
My father yells and I lift my finger up high
Oh daddy dear you know you're still number one
But squirrels they want to have fun
Oh squirrels just want to have -

That's all they really want
Some fun
When the nut-job day is done
Squirrels - they want to have fun
Oh squirrels just want to have fun

Some boys take a beautiful squirrel
And skin her and gut her and give her a twirl
on the barbecue spit until they're well done
Oh squirrels they want to have fun
Oh squirrels just want to have

That's all they really want
Some fun
When the nut-job day is done
squirrels - they want to have fun
Oh squirrels just want to have

They want to have fun,
They want to have fun....

Teanna Babcock , a fitness instructor who regularly bikes through the area, said she often sees squirrels behaving badly around children. "The squirrels were all around the children like they didn't care they were people," Babcock recalled.
=================================================
Ahh, the intellectual prowess of today's fitness instructor. And extra points for the name 'Teanna.'

Instead, she said, fault lies quite literally in the hands of humans who feed the animals everything from ``French toast to french fries."
The Twinkie Defense™: they've gone mad because of the all the junk food!

Beware the squirrelly wrath!

Squirrel Problem?
Shot gun?
No PRoblem!

Keep it short and simple folks.

Instead, she said, fault lies quite literally in the hands of humans who feed the animals everything from ``French toast to french fries."
======

Problem solved - don't throw them any more French food!

I think I've had too many gumballs. I could swear that squirrel just asked me if I had any Grey Poupon.

I would suggest installing more power lines. Worked for me - *FOOOM* - no more squirrel.

Would that be the thoroughly-cooked squirrel outside of my office, stevie?

Maybe park patrons should try squirrel fishing...

http://humor.about.com/gi/dynamic/offsite.htm?site=http://www.eecs.harvard.edu/%7Eyaz/en/squirrel%5Ffishing.html


Sorry, I don't know how to link and I'm too lazy to figure it out.

mud, great earworm!

French Dressing?

(what comes between French Toast and French Fries?)

OK, I'm normally not a paranoid person, but I just went to Charlotte, NC's newspaper (I work in Charlotte) and what do I see but an article about my hometown!

http://www.charlotte.com/mld/charlotte/15621503.htm

The plague appears to be spreading. Do I need to stock up on beef stew and toilet paper so I can be prepared for the attack?

Well east coast squirrels are pips
I really dig those tails cooked rare
And the southern squirrels with the tangy sauce
They knock my taste buds out down there

The mid-west farmers slaughter them and really bake them up real nice
And the northern squirrels they just can't be dismissed
They keep the appetite strong at night

I wish they all could be california
I wish they all could be california
I wish they all could be california squirrels

The west coast has the gourmet feeders
Make the squirrels all act like freaks
They dig a french toast platter on hawaii island
No need for stuffing nuts in their cheeks

I been all around this great big world
And I ate all kinds of squirrels
Yeah, but I couldnt wait to get back in the states
Back to the tastiest squirrels in the world

I wish they all could be california
I wish they all could be california
I wish they all could be california squirrels

I wish they all could be california
(squirrels, squirrels, squirrels yeah I dig the)
I wish they all could be california
(squirrels, squirrels, squirrels yeah I dig the)
I wish they all could be california
(squirrels, squirrels, squirrels yeah I dig the)
I wish they all could be california
(squirrels, squirrels, squirrels yeah I dig the)

ROFSnorking at Meanie!!

And actually, wouldn't it be French fries, and THEN French toast? Apples to Watermelon would have made more sense. I don't care that they didn't actually feed them watermelon. I'm just too lazy to think of food that starts with "z".

This is a pic of me at the Public garden in boston feeding said squirrels. http://groups.msn.com/KimbaTYoung/young.msnw?action=ShowPhoto&PhotoID=788

They have never actually attacked me.

Muffles - zucchini (or however that's spelled)

of course!! Zucchini. And I believe you spelled it correctly. But again, I doubt they fed it to the squirrels.

Meanie, that was BRILLIANT! :-)

Darn squirrels have been taking lessons from the geese!

Good one, meanie!

excellente, Meanie!!

Well, I must admit that I, too, had to have the 14 day rabies vaccine when I was 17 y/o. Yes beer was involved. Need I say more?

Cute and frisky turns aggressive and risky"

Did I date her, back in the day?

The comments to this entry are closed.

-
 
Terms of Service | Privacy Policy | Copyright | About The Miami Herald | Advertise