EW

Baby Man

(Thanks to Claire Martin)

Note: A similar article was sent in last year by many, many alert readers, but was deemed by the s.b. (and quite possibly The Blog, too) as being wayyyyy too weird to blog. Apparently our standards (ha) have changed. -- the s.b.

Comments

[MOTW]

Babty Man? With all due respect, Mr Blog, you need some coffee ...

[AFKAT]

This is just sick on sooo many levels...

[MOTW]

I could only stand to read that thru page 2. This isn't the same as Weingarten on the Great Zucchini.
Baby'll be searching for friends for a while, me thinks.

[Siouxie]

AFKAT, you took the words right out of my fingertips!

This is just soooooooooo disturbing (my apologies to any blog baby diaper wearing guy out there).

course I KNOW blurk would probably pretend to be one just to get breastfed....still...ewwwwwwww!

[Sean]

He really like to pamper himself..

[Siouxie]

*sends a colada up to the Blog to wake him up*

I know...tough game last night...

[Sean]

Is this the same guy who dresses like a rabbit? And I saw an episode of CSI:Somewhere that had a case like this. Some rich guy who liked to dress up like a baby. 'Cept he got whacked, like permanently.

[mudstuffin]

reminder: sometimes
fifteen minutes is too much
exposure for some

c'mon, dude. really
i started wearing pull-ups
at only thirty

relieved once again
to see that there are others
sillier than me

[slyeyes]

What a way to start the morning, cross-dressing infantacism.

And

ew.

[Christobol]

You know that saying, "Spare the rod, put up with a smelly old weird guy in baby clothes who sh!ts himself"?

It finally makes sense.

BTW, Dave, as a longtime Minnesota Vikings idiot fan, let me just tell you that Duante is going to throw a lot of game deciding passes. Unfortunately, they'll usually be interceptions. Also, just so you're prepared, he holds the NFL record for fumbles per game for his career.

[tropichunt.com guy™]

I'm sorry, I didn't need to get beyond the first paragraph to realize that I did NOT want to know anymore.

[crossgirl]

wonders if when he's drinking his beer, it's in a baby bottle.

[Jemmy]

I am repulsed, yet I am fascinated. But mostly, I am repulsed.

[Meanie the Blue]

He's a what??!!

[Christobol]

You must have been a beautiful baby
You must have been a wonderful child
When you were only starting to go to kindergarten
I bet you drove the little boys wild.
And when it came to wearing big diapers
You must have shown the other kids how.
I can see the teacher's eyes as she smelled your little surprise
You must have made the cutest bow.
You must've been a beautiful baby
But what the hell is wrong with you now?

Does your mother realize
The stork delivered such a prize
The day he left you on the family tree?
Does your dad appreciate
The chance to review what you ate
Even after half a century?
If they don't just send them both to me.

You must have been a beautiful baby
You must have been a wonderful child.
When you were only starting to go to kindergarten
I bet you drove the little boys wild.
And when it came to wearing pink dresses
You must have shown the other boys how.
I can hear your sister's cries as you stole the cutest guys
She must have felt a bit like a cow.
You must've been a beautiful baby
But what the hell is wrong with you now?

[MOTW]

BRAVO Christobol!

[Chaz]

he just needs a hug(gies)

[Sarah J]

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwww.

That is all.

[Christobol]

I think this needs to find its way into more TV shows, that's what I think. And I know you were wondering.

24

Jack: Diane, what’s going on? What’s wrong?

Diane: Derek is inside the terminal. Why are you wearing a dress and a...is that a big diaper under those frillies?

Jack: Yeah. So what? Do you know what kind of day I usually have? You think I get a lot of "me time"? You think I get to sit on the toilet and read the sports page? Nevermind all this. I see Derek. He’s with the other hostages, but he’s not hurt.

Diane: Please don’t let anything happen to him. Sweet mercy! Are you pooping now?

Jack: *grunting* This is not your fault. I'll take care of everything, as per usual. Then I'm coming back, and singing you a little ditty, 'bout Jack and Diane, two American kids growin' up, in the heartland!.

[Suddenly, the wall by the emergency exit explodes. Many hostages scream. A man in a pink leotard swings past on a vine.]

Beresch: Fire!

[The terrorists fire into the room behind. Another wall explodes from behind the terrorists, and the CTU SWAT team breaks through. Many terrorists are taken down immediately, including those surrounding the hostages. A sasquatch is seen playing an accordion in the background.]

Jack: We got a problem. One of the hostages is missing. He was working with the terrorists.

Curtis: Are you feeling okay? This dress and diaper thing...dear heavens, you smell like a third world public toilet. Give me a description; I’ll take care of it.

Jack: Yeah, let's make this about my hobbies, shall we? That seems like a good idea. I have half a mind to shoot you in the thigh, Curtis! But instead, if we can stop discussing my outfit, I’ll help you; let’s go.

Curtis: Jack, you need to go back to CTU. Buchanan just gave orders to take you into custody. Plus, I think you need a change or you're going to get the mother of all rashes.

Jack: I have ointment for that. I watched Beresch give this guy a key card. Something else is going down here; we’ve got to find this guy now.

[Cut to adult diaper commercial]

[Jeff Meyerson]

EW does not even begin to cover it, Dave.

And bravo, Christobol & mud.

[Bones]

Soldier #1: Even if our struggle on this battlefield here is not fully appreciated, it's worth fighting and even dying to give people the freedom they need to live their lives.

Soldier #2: I just saw a full-grown man who lives his life dressed as a baby girl.

Soldier #1: I quit.

[MUNkeyDOg]

For some reason that pic of him in the chair reminds me of Bill Murray.....WIerd.

[Scott]

Wait, these guys WANT to be breastfed? Have any of you ever, um, sampled the sap from the tree, so to speak? It ain't Chablis comin' out of there, I'm here to tell you. I'm not sure what babies see in it. (NOTE: Not that I have personal experience in this. I heard it all from a friend.)

[jon]

Wait, feeding oats to a horse is an act of animal cruelty??
What's the penalty for giving them apples?

[Stevie W]

Does he get to board first on airplanes? Does he get to carry liquids?

[Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa]

This is totally sick and I refuse to laugh. Maybe he ate lead paint chips as a child.

I will say, however, *snork* @ C-bol and mud.

[Brianne]

Looks like someone has some mommy issues.

[Somewhere North]

That's it. Obviously freedom has gone too far. Its time for the Taliban to take over.

Plus, how does one screen to become a "mommy" and exactly how do you describe that on your resume?

[LaLaLisa]

Just when I was worried I was getting too weird, things like this come along to reassure me I'm Laura Effing Ingalls.

It was fascinating, though.

[Juggler of Geese]

King Baby, Season five. Probably one of the creepiest episodes of CSI Las Vegas to date.

[Meanie the Blue]

Sugar and spice and ..... um, cancel that.

[Schadeboy]

Crikey! This guy's in Arizona! This does not speak well for us natives. We must form a task force and set up a few million meetings to decide what to do with him.

[Bones]

Dude Looks Like A Baby
Dude Looks Like A Baby
Dude Looks Like A Bady
Dude Looks Like A Bady

Cruisin` to a bar on the shore
His diaper rash is itchin’ for sure
She became his new mommy tonight
“Baby, you need to be changed
Tonight I’ll get the wipes” – that’s right

Sometimes when he’s havin’ a bottle
Of milk, he might make a new puddle
‘Forgive me if I just lost control’
Then he cried and he cried
Till she burped him just right

Dude Looks Like A Baby
Dude Looks Like A Baby
Dude Looks Like A Baby
Dude Looks Like A Baby

So don’t just a babe by his diaper
If he fills it he’ll just call on his wiper
It just doesn’t seem wise to fill your pants with mud pies
He had a diaper full of poopy
Lord, imagine my surprise!

...My sincerest apologies to Aerosmith.

[Bones]

Oops:

So never *judge* a babe by his diaper...

[Meanie the Blue]

*Giggles and coos at Bones*

[betsi]

yeah...I saw that episode of CSI too.
PS, I heard that Peter MacNicol is moving from Numb3rs to 24 this season.

[Bones]

Thanks Meanie! I think the last time I was cooed at, I was in diapers myself.

** slinks away after realizing that on this thread that could be taken _very_ wrong **

[Jeff Meyerson]

Wait, these guys WANT to be breastfed? Have any of you ever, um, sampled the sap from the tree, so to speak? It ain't Chablis comin' out of there, I'm here to tell you. I'm not sure what babies see in it. (NOTE: Not that I have personal experience in this. I heard it all from a friend.)

Gee Scott, that image was the only thing this story didn't have. Thanks for sharing, NOT!

This guy's in Arizona! This does not speak well for us natives. We must form a task force and set up a few million meetings to decide what to do with him.

Schadey, that really made me laugh as my sister works for the Governor's office and is always on about the meetings.

[bookworm]

The part that wierded me out the most was that he chained his toilet shut to reverse his toilet training. Parents of small children (or relatively recently small children) know how much work this is undoing. I'm sorry, I can accept alot of fetishes and alternative lifestyles as normal, but this is by no means one of them. This man should be in an institution, even if he is able to pay his bills and conduct his aldult affairs.

[bookworm]

Reaches up and yanks an "l" from the last line.

[twodogsbarking]

This is way too true! He's been profiled before. What a waste of newspaper space.

[Horseshoe Road Inn]

If this were a Twilight Zone episode, this man would have a severe stroke causing him to lose all ability to turn over by himself, swallow, hold things, point at pictures or make meaningful sounds, sit up, crawl or walk, or even for one second have any control over his bowels or bladder. He has to be tube fed. He can't express himself. The camera pulls back, he's in a nursing home and acquaintances are saying to the nurse, "In a way, he must be thrilled to death. It's what he always wanted."