ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
Ridley and I ARRRRR now in Seattle, which was a little rainy when we arrived, although nobody apologized for that. I was thinking of phoning some folks back in Minneapolis and telling them it was raining here in Seattle, so they could tell me they were sorry.
But it seems to be clearing up, and we're getting ready to celebrate Talk Like a Pirate Day. Seattle is a fine place to do this. We were here on Talk Like a Pirate Day in 2004, and during our book-strumpeting event a group of drunks festive people dressed as pirates showed up in a highly modified Dodge van with a working cannon. It was very exciting. You do not often see people brandishing actual swords in a bookstore.
No arrrrrrrrrain in Seatle!!!
Posted by: The Dread Pirate Chris | September 19, 2006 at 01:08 PM
Maybe the Pirates in a Dodge (WBAGNFARB??) could help us build our TPeashooter?
Posted by: The Dread Pirate Chris | September 19, 2006 at 01:09 PM
Anyone?
Bueller?
Arrrrrrrrrrrrr?
Posted by: The Dread Pirate Chris | September 19, 2006 at 01:11 PM
Sorry about the rain in Seattle, dave.
Posted by: bjørn | September 19, 2006 at 01:12 PM
Me like "Pirates in a Dodge", Dread Pirate Chris...she deserves a *snork*, she do.
Posted by: Capt. Hore (Sheik of the Rumps) | September 19, 2006 at 01:13 PM
Aaaarrrghghgh...Dave it rains all the time in Seattle - better for plunderin' and scallywaggin'
Posted by: 24 paces to the treasure | September 19, 2006 at 01:15 PM
Pirate Soccer Moms In Minivans(WBAGNFARB)
Bjorn...get with the spirit of the day...that would be
Arrr, sorry about the rain in Seattle, Cap'n Da'e. Gar, Where can I find a bottle o'rum?
Posted by: Chazamataz The Terrible | September 19, 2006 at 01:15 PM
He
But thanks all the same.
Posted by: The Dread Pirate Chris | September 19, 2006 at 01:16 PM
hey...send a friend a pirate song
Pirate messages
Posted by: Chazamataz The Terrible | September 19, 2006 at 01:18 PM
ARRRRRRRRRRRR to the RRRRRRRRRRAIN!!
Posted by: Siouxie | September 19, 2006 at 01:21 PM
Ahoy, me fiery wench Helga! How be ye on this fine holiday?
Wha's th' matter wi' a little rain? All th' better fer sneakin' up on yer target!
(An' it makes a professional TP hit into a thing o' beauty!)
Posted by: Cap'n William Buttscar | September 19, 2006 at 01:23 PM
Me not refering to your gender Dread Pirate Chris, but the gender of ye RB. Since the female,lady,woman,girl,lass..is me favorite, me tend to think that way.
Posted by: Capt. Hore (Sheik of the Rumps) | September 19, 2006 at 01:24 PM
wet wenches are always me favorite. especially after a tankard or three o' rum.
Posted by: Chazamataz The Terrible | September 19, 2006 at 01:26 PM
Arrr Cap'n Dave They do be apologizin for the sun in Seattle
Posted by: Mad Weasel Wench | September 19, 2006 at 01:26 PM
YAAAAARRRRRR t' that, Chazamataz!!
Posted by: Cap'n William Buttscar | September 19, 2006 at 01:26 PM
Ahh. OK.
Having a name that goes both ways (I don't, sorry) can sometimes be a little confusing.
Fer those of ye who be carin, me parents did name me after a certain A. A. Milne character.
Posted by: The Dread Pirate Chris | September 19, 2006 at 01:27 PM
Swords in a Bookstore would be a good name for a horror movie.
Posted by: Olo Baggins of Bywater | September 19, 2006 at 01:29 PM
ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!
But Dave(y Jones), weren't you a-seein' people brandishin' swords durin' yer ferst book signin's with Ridley?
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | September 19, 2006 at 01:30 PM
GRRRRRRRRRRRr working my butt off today!!
ohhhhh oops...I mean...
ARRRRRRRRRR I be workin' me arse off today!!
Posted by: Siouxie | September 19, 2006 at 01:30 PM
"Take me to yer Fiction Section - or taste me cold steel..."
Posted by: Burnin' Laura Morgan | September 19, 2006 at 01:30 PM
hello, Christopher Robin
Posted by: Poo | September 19, 2006 at 01:31 PM
ARRRRRRRR MP3s and DVD ISOs off the starboard bow!
Posted by: moderndaypirate | September 19, 2006 at 01:31 PM
I'd rather taste somethin' else o' yours, me buxom wench!
Posted by: Cap'n William Buttscar | September 19, 2006 at 01:32 PM
Those scurvy Pirates on a Dodge should comandeer Cap't Sammy Jackson brandish their cutlasses and "pursuade" him to be making a movie, says I. Yaaarrrrrr!
Posted by: Laura GarrrrH! | September 19, 2006 at 01:32 PM
Yarrrr an' ye beat me to it, Poo. Howsomeever, me being blind n'all, Chris, do ye be of th' male persuasion? just askin
Posted by: Blind Annie Bigbootie | September 19, 2006 at 01:32 PM
Arrr, har's t' captain Da'e and his band o' merry
drunks..revelers. Aye, me parrot concurs.Posted by: Cap'n Izzy Jailbait (DavetheRed) | September 19, 2006 at 01:32 PM
That ain't piratin', modern - that be jus' stealin'!
Posted by: Cap'n William Buttscar | September 19, 2006 at 01:33 PM
"Arrrr, ye Gawds! Yer puffy shirt be SO last century! Yer best be removin' it...an' whilst we be sprucin' yer up, let me polish yer sword fer ya..."
Posted by: Pirate Swishy-go-gailey | September 19, 2006 at 01:35 PM
Annie - I do be indeed of the gender that says "We don't need no steeeenking toilet seats."
Or toilets fer that matter, trees be just fine when landlubbin.
Posted by: The Dread Pirate Chris | September 19, 2006 at 01:36 PM
Th' las' time I shat in a tree, I found th' experience t' be less than comfortable, me matey.
I be not above th' use of a toilet seat when th' occasion calls fer it.
Posted by: Cap'n William Buttscar | September 19, 2006 at 01:37 PM
That would explain the name then, right matey?
Posted by: The Dread Pirate Chris | September 19, 2006 at 01:38 PM
Aye, an' a sad story 'tis, too.
Posted by: Cap'n William Buttscar | September 19, 2006 at 01:39 PM
good one, Dread Pirate Chris!
Posted by: Poo | September 19, 2006 at 01:40 PM
Here's be hopin' that them fine folks with the DodgeCannonMobile show up again to scupper the scallywags Dave and Ridley and force them to drink the grog!
Arrrrgh meshugina....
Posted by: BlackTar Higgy Pegleg | September 19, 2006 at 01:42 PM
"Annie - I do be indeed of the gender that says "We don't need no steeeenking toilet seats."
Yarrrr, aye, nor directions either I'll warrent.
Posted by: Blind Annie Bigbootie | September 19, 2006 at 01:43 PM
Le's jus' say that when one be balancin' all precariously-like, it be important that one's sword be attended to, or else in its scabbard.
Th' crew were merciless in their taunting o' me fer the nex' month, as I had t' even sleep standing up.
Posted by: Cap'n William Buttscar | September 19, 2006 at 01:43 PM
I be mighty jealous of those rainy Seattle folks
Posted by: Machete Yvette Hacke | September 19, 2006 at 01:43 PM
O' course, I tell th' wenches th' amazing true story of th' time I got attacked by th' siamese twins, an' th' one got th' better of me backside whilst I got th' better o' his other half.
Harrr.
Posted by: Cap'n William Buttscar | September 19, 2006 at 01:44 PM
Arrr, Dread Pirate Chris, ye got me to laughin' aloud
Posted by: Puffy Sleeved Sandy | September 19, 2006 at 01:45 PM
I be frustrated to be ashore in th' fine port o' Portland, jus' a few hours' sailing down th' coast. Here, we have th' rain, an' no Cap'n Dave fer consolation.
Posted by: Cap'n William Buttscar | September 19, 2006 at 01:46 PM
Dirrections??!??
I be after havin the stars and a good sextant.
Posted by: The Dread Pirate Chris | September 19, 2006 at 01:47 PM
"I be after havin the stars and a good sextant"
...aren't we all?
Posted by: p00 | September 19, 2006 at 01:49 PM
Yaaaarrr, I could use me a good sextant, meself.
Posted by: Cap'n William Buttscar | September 19, 2006 at 01:49 PM
If you combined The Fog with a bookstore and Talk Like a Pirate Day, that'd be a movied I'd illegally download, copy and sell on a street corner.
Posted by: A Pirate of Exquisite Mind | September 19, 2006 at 01:49 PM
One o' the first things me ol' dad taught me was to always be sure that me cutlass was pointed in a safe direction.
Posted by: The Dread Pirate Chris | September 19, 2006 at 01:50 PM
what's all this talk of s3x stunts?
Posted by: Norman the Fashionably Late (Wyo) | September 19, 2006 at 01:50 PM
sextant??? *perk*
uh...ARRRRRR sextant?? *perrrrrrrrrrrrrrk*
Posted by: Cap'n Helga Beerbong (Siouxie) | September 19, 2006 at 01:51 PM
Arrrrr, Norman! It be good t' see ye, e'en if ye be indeed fashionably late!
Posted by: Cap'n William Buttscar | September 19, 2006 at 01:51 PM
*snork* Siouxie - not what you thought it was, huh?
Posted by: 24 | September 19, 2006 at 01:52 PM
Are the local Starbucks offering "Grogaccinos" in honor of the day?
ps: Arrrrrr.
Posted by: Cap'n Lairbo "Wench Inspector #29" Bork (Bork, bork) | September 19, 2006 at 01:52 PM
Me da' always taught me t' keep mine in its scabbard, Chris.
Posted by: Cap'n William Buttscar | September 19, 2006 at 01:53 PM
ARRRRR to ya, Latterday Norman!!! how ye be?
Posted by: Siouxie | September 19, 2006 at 01:53 PM
Aye, been diggin' fer me treasure, Mateys. Lost the fargin' map.
Posted by: Norman the Fashionably Late (Wyo) | September 19, 2006 at 01:53 PM
Well, we be glad to see ye, Norman, late or early. Have some grog?
Posted by: Cap'n William Buttscar | September 19, 2006 at 01:54 PM
Aye (not eye), 24!! *sigh*
Posted by: Siouxie | September 19, 2006 at 01:54 PM
better to be late to s3x party than way early...if thee catch me draft me harties...
Posted by: Chazamataz The Terrible | September 19, 2006 at 01:55 PM
Findin' a sextant be no difficult thing - it be finding yer way around with it tha's th' trick.
Posted by: Cap'n William Buttscar (Clean Hands) | September 19, 2006 at 01:56 PM
"You do not often see people brandishing actual swords in a bookstore."
Sure you do. In the crosSWORDS puzzle section.
Har har har har har
(JEI [joke educational index]: 3rd grade)
Posted by: Stevie W | September 19, 2006 at 01:58 PM
This be getting interesting...HAAR HAAAAAR (translation: snork) to many!
Posted by: Machete Yvette Hacke | September 19, 2006 at 02:00 PM
Sextants be not that hard. Harder (arrrrrrr) than a map an' compass, which in turn be harder than battin yer eyelashes at someone. But still...
Posted by: The Dread Pirate Chris | September 19, 2006 at 02:04 PM
Cap'n Buttscar:
According to the Pirate Laws of the High Seas (article 6, paragraph 3), "...removal from scabbard is permissible when, but only after, the command 'Prepare to be boarded!' has been declared."
Posted by: Cap'n Lairbo "Is that a plank off yer port side or are ye just happy to see me?" Bork | September 19, 2006 at 02:05 PM
Well, this be Arkansas, I guess it be OK to have s3x with your aunt.
Posted by: Capt. Hore (Sheik of the Rumps) | September 19, 2006 at 02:05 PM
i be guessin' that cap'n dave shops (plunders?) at different booke stores than i be frequenting. poor cap'n dave.
Posted by: xgrrrrl the tragically cute | September 19, 2006 at 02:05 PM
cap'n lairbo, it should be mandatory, pre-scabbard removal, that all men of the male persuasian warn us wenches when they are preparing to bore(d) us.
Posted by: xgrrrrl the tragically cute | September 19, 2006 at 02:08 PM
Cap'n Bork, I do believe that the command has t' not just be issueed, but acknowledged. Or did I take th' wrong piratin' class?
Posted by: Cap'n William Buttscar (Clean Hands) | September 19, 2006 at 02:09 PM
Capt. Hore - I think PLotHS (a7, p21) says "anyone", not just "aunt". Rapin and pillagin be an equal oportunity sport.
Posted by: The Dread Pirate Chris | September 19, 2006 at 02:09 PM
aarrghghgh, xgrrrl be right - a man had best be warnin' me afore he tries to plunder my treasures
Posted by: wench | September 19, 2006 at 02:10 PM
HARRRRR @ th' tragically cute wench!
Posted by: Cap'n William Buttscar (Clean Hands) | September 19, 2006 at 02:10 PM
E'er since tha' dratted Pirate's Law o' th' High Seas were adopted, piratin's been no fun - always some skinny swabby in wingtips poppin' up t' "advise" ye as to how yer piratin' duties should be carried out.
Posted by: Cap'n William Buttscar (Clean Hands) | September 19, 2006 at 02:13 PM
Ok...this sounds pretty kinky but...
ARRRRRR Ye best keep ye cannon outta me bunghole!!!
Posted by: Siouxie | September 19, 2006 at 02:13 PM
Ye didn't read the Laws all the way ta the end Buttscar. It says clearly that it's OK to run the skinny swabby in wingtips through.
Posted by: The Dread Pirate Chris | September 19, 2006 at 02:14 PM
Cappy Buttscar:
Ay, matey, an updated version of the rule book is amended with "acknowledgement and permission."
Posted by: Cap'n Lairbo Bork | September 19, 2006 at 02:14 PM
Chaz... took me ages to catch yer draft. Did though, so ye got me laughing. I guess that's why you're the Terrible, and I be swabbin' the deck.
Posted by: Jemmy, swabbin' the deck | September 19, 2006 at 02:15 PM
Aye, I knew ye were a saucy wench, Helga. Any pirate who goes t' use a bunghole wi'out an invitation is askin' t' have 'is plank keelhauled.
Posted by: Cap'n William Buttscar (Clean Hands) | September 19, 2006 at 02:15 PM
Fer those of ye takin notes, bungholes be way to small fer cannon. Ye could get the barel of yer flint lock in there, but why ye'd want to shoot the grog barrel is beyond me.
Posted by: The Dread Pirate Chris | September 19, 2006 at 02:17 PM
Arrrrr - then I be in full compliance wi' th' Laws already, Chris. :-D
Posted by: Cap'n William Buttscar (Clean Hands) | September 19, 2006 at 02:17 PM
Posted by: Cap'n William Buttscar (Clean Hands) | September 19, 2006 at 02:17 PM
Arrrr ye be goin' to eat some CRABS while yer there in Seattle, Davey?
Posted by: Thievin' Guin the Blonde | September 19, 2006 at 02:17 PM
Ahhhhhhhhh
I broke the italics!!!
Posted by: The Dread Pirate Chris | September 19, 2006 at 02:17 PM
testing
Posted by: judi | September 19, 2006 at 02:18 PM
skinny swabby in wingtips
Aye, Cap'n Buttscar. Out here we calls 'em Game Wardens.
An jist fer the record, swabby's, ya' don't bring a knife to a gun fight. Ye'll ne're see a sword in a book shop here, ye'd be too far out gunned.
Posted by: Norman the Fashionably Late (Wyo) | September 19, 2006 at 02:18 PM
Holly Cr@p!!
A multi-pirate post.
I be needin more grog and whatever it is that us pirates smoke.
Posted by: The Dread Pirate Chris | September 19, 2006 at 02:19 PM
guin - drooling now!!!!
Posted by: 24 | September 19, 2006 at 02:19 PM
An' I fixed 'em fer ye, Dread Chris.
Posted by: Cap'n William Buttscar (Clean Hands) | September 19, 2006 at 02:19 PM
I be thinkin' tha' if'n Cap'n Dave comes home wi' crabs, Mrs. Blog will be less than amused.
Posted by: Cap'n William Buttscar (Clean Hands) | September 19, 2006 at 02:21 PM
Cutlass, flintlock, 16-pound cannon, TPeashooter.
I think we could take the game warden.
Posted by: The Dread Pirate Chris | September 19, 2006 at 02:21 PM
whp be-eth this Judi person? Reveal yerself to the masses, wench!
what is this testing you speak of?
Posted by: Chazamataz The Terrible | September 19, 2006 at 02:21 PM
I' we're t' be tested, what manner of disease be it that ye be lookin' fer?
Posted by: Cap'n William Buttscar (Clean Hands) | September 19, 2006 at 02:23 PM
AYE, Buttscar!!!Not ta mention his skull crrrrrrushed between me thighs! 'n his wallywacker slashed t' bits!!
Posted by: Siouxie | September 19, 2006 at 02:23 PM
whoops, sorry ;)
Posted by: kidnapped innocent maiden judi | September 19, 2006 at 02:24 PM
Aye, Cap'n Beerbong be havin' issues methinks.
Posted by: Norman the Fashionably Late (Wyo) | September 19, 2006 at 02:25 PM
Ye gots a hedgehog there, then, Helga?
Saucy indeed! Arrrr.
Posted by: Cap'n William Buttscar (Clean Hands) | September 19, 2006 at 02:25 PM
Aye, that be better, maiden judi. I'll be warnin' ye, though, ye'll not be stayin' innocent fer long in this crowd o' swashbucklers.
Posted by: Cap'n William Buttscar (Clean Hands) | September 19, 2006 at 02:26 PM
harrrrrrrrrrrrr @ ye innocent (cough) maiden!!
Posted by: Siouxie | September 19, 2006 at 02:26 PM
Arrrrr, miss judi, you keep on using that word "innocent". I do not think it means what you think it means...
Posted by: Norman the Fashionably Late (Wyo) | September 19, 2006 at 02:26 PM
Cap'n Helga - I could be after gettin into the first half o' that, but only if I kin wear a DreamHelmet.
Posted by: The Dread Pirate Chris | September 19, 2006 at 02:27 PM
Ye might try this, instead.
Posted by: Cap'n William Buttscar (Clean Hands) | September 19, 2006 at 02:28 PM
That be a mighty funny-lookin' pirate what shows up wearin' one o' those hats, Dread Chris.
Might but improve some pirates' fightin' skills, I guess, tho'.
Posted by: Cap'n William Buttscar (Clean Hands) | September 19, 2006 at 02:31 PM
I be after plannin to keelhaul the blog software. I know the DreamHelmet got blogged before and I thought I got it right.
-Yank
-gurgle, gurgle, gurgle
Posted by: The Dread Pirate Chris | September 19, 2006 at 02:31 PM
HARRR! lovely helmet!! NTTAWWT
Posted by: Siouxie | September 19, 2006 at 02:32 PM