WE WILL NEVER LEARN

Comments

[MOTW]

No one could tell why the mother squirrel had been killed

As in real estate: Location, Location, Location

[Punkin Poo]

How about we just feed em TO puppies?

[blurk]

Okay, now I have to expand it to 4 words.
Very.
Small.
Shot.
Gun.

[artchick]

Are they sure it was lightening? Maybe Mama was practising the age-old squirrel habit of chewing on the power lines. Then again, maybe God is showing us he's on our side after all.

[Siouxie]

“She’ll raise it on a bottle until it gets old enough to release,” Renegar said.

sure...so it can become yet another terrorist squirrel? I say what blurk keeps saying...

shotgun

[Siouxie]

thought so...

[pogo]

Squirrel season is open in GA.

[O. the U(manity)]

Gonna release it?

Nah, never werk ... feral critters that have been "adopted" by humans rarely develop the needed skills to survive in the wild, whether that "wild" be around Blurk or Wyo, or near some city streets ...

It's gonna "not make it" ... almost guaranteed ... but some folks will get a chance to say ... AAAAWWWWWWWWWWWW ...

Me? I'd say, "AAAAWWWWWWWWW ... MISSED IT ... LEMME TRY AGAIN!"

[kitten]

double agent????? we can use him against them....

[Christobol]

Last time I tried to offer someone "huge quantities of the milk of human kindness" I got a restraining order for my trouble.

[Jazzzz]

Once, while golfing, we left the course because of a thunder storm. Sure enough, lightning struck on the hole we had been playing and literally exploded an oak. We went to investigate and found a squirrel that was charred to a crisp. Sad, but, terrorism has a price to pay.

[Addicted to 24]

Now Dave this baby Squirrel could go on to do some good in this world.

[mudstuffin]

Yeah, my daughter's teacher keeps a rat in a cage in the classroom - named it - takes it out and plays with it.

(this part made up) wears white pancake make-up and a black dress and a petangram around her neck everyday.

[spankyospanky]

You used the word "learn".

This is Oklahoma we're talking about.

[Christobol]

"We've got a situation here!"

"What is it?"

"Hurt squirrel. Do we have any bandages, or squirrel tylenol, anything like that?"

"No."

"Well, what do we have?"

"Huge quantities of the milk of human kindness."

"Yeah, that's not really gonna help."

"Well, why do you think we have so much of it around?"

[insomniac]

"Huge quantities of the milk of human kindness."

without similar amounts of the Oreos of human intelligence, it's just not the same...

[Schadeboy]

This is so way off topic, but I have to ask it. Is anyone else seeing those adds for "South Beach Hotel and Residences" on the right of this blog? Please tell me that I'm not the only one getting distracted from the blog by those things!

We now return you to your regularly scheduled Squirrel Terrorism story of the day.

[Kilmeny]

Obviously they haven't gotten much of the chocolate cake of common sense.

[casey]

I'm ashamed to say that I once raised Sammy and Sally Squirrel from about 2 weeks of age until they were "old enough to release". Unfortunately, after all of that hard work (feedings every 3 hrs 'round the clock is hard work) they were eaten by dogs. They had no fear of natural predators. Once, my mom's standard poodle walked by a tree and Sammy jumped on her back for a joy ride. Poor poodle dang near had a heart attack. They lasted about 2 months in the "wild" of my front yard.

[mudstuffin]

Schade: Yes, but I'm not complaining - they're so much better than the picture of John McCain that's often there.

[Schadeboy]

Oh, I certainly didn't mean to sound like I was complaining. But I do need to remind myself where the priorities are. Staring at the distractions, or reading the Blog. In this case, it's hard to determine which is more important...

[Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa]

I'm loving this baby squirrel, just loving it!

[Clean Hands]

Schadeboy, I find that the Classmates girls making kissies at me at the top of the page is likewise distracting. The first time they did it, I thought I needed to lay off of the Scottish therapy, but they've kept at it.

I'm playing hard to get, though, and refraining from kissing back.

[kitten]

*snork* Clean! poor girls are probably just looking for a friendly prieck

[BLT]

absence of kissie girls
really really good adblock
quiet rejoicing

[KCSteve]

They're going to name the squirrel "Lucky"?

Let's see:

1) Tree / home destroyed by lightning
2) Parents gone, probably dead
3) Siblings gone, probably dead
4) Never going to have a 'normal' life (well, is that actually bad when you're a squirrel?)

Yeah, that sounds 'lucky' to me all right!

[rita]

My aunt found two orphaned baby squirrels about 10 years ago. She raised them both and planned to release them, but of course by then they couldn't fend for themselves. So she gave them her spare bedroom.

The boy squirrel died in a few months, but Miss Piggy lived to the ripe old age of 2.

My aunt also has 21 cats, if that explains anything.

[Stevie W]

"Huge quantities of the milk of human kindness."

I didn't know Dolly Parton retired to Oklahoma.

[Stevie W]

{The squirrel’s mother died in the lightning strike at the Frank and Janice Cuzalina residence at 100 Peaceable Road...}

(Apologies to the Four Preps)

Twenty-six miles across the sea
Janice Cuzalina is a waitin' for me
Janice Cuzalina, the finder of
Rodents, rodents. Rodents, rodents.

[OkieDokie]

why do these stories always have to come from Oklahoma? People will start to think we're all nuts here, or something.

/leaves for psychiatric appointment.

[Stevie W]

Coooooooz-alina, where the squirrels fall down from the trees
While we sit and talk
A hungry hawk
Waits for baby squirrels in the breeze

C-U-Z-A-L-I-N-A,
Cuzalina!

[Siouxie]

stevie...I'm stomped! dunno those ...sorry!

[Rocky Squirrel]

I just want to commend the writer of that article.

Most squirrel-related news is subject to the anti-squirrel bias present in most
of the mainstream press. (And yes, I'm looking at YOU, Mr. Barry.)

Yet this article goes on ... and on ... and on ... in delightful detail about everything
that was done to save this poor little baby. In fact, this story was so important,
the SENIOR editor was tasked to write it.

Mr. James Beaty, I salute you!!!

Clearly, the fine folks in McElester have their priorities straight.

Hoakie-Smokes!!!!

[Reigh]

Puppy formula? They make puppy formula?????

[mudstuffin, scratching himself at length]

"I find that the Classmates girls making kissies at me at the top of the page is likewise distracting."

I am reminded of the scene in "Wayne's World" where Garth asks Wayne if he ever thought Bugs Bunny was atractive when he dressed in drag.

I forgot about the kissy girls, but yeah, me too.

[Stevie W]

"...this story was so important, the SENIOR editor was tasked to write it."

I noticed that too, rocky. I wonder what stories are relegated to the junior editors.

[Jazzzz]

There goes Mud braggin' again. " scratching myself at LENGTH".

[Siouxie]

*sends mud some anti-itching cream*

[stevie w]

..I'm stomped! dunno those...

Siouxie -

Oklahoma! - Rogers and Hammerstein. Or was it Leonard and Bernstein. Title song. That one you should know.

The other - more obscure - Catalina Island off the SoCal coast? That was the song about it..."Santa Catalina, the island of romance...sounded irresistibly like 'Janice Cuzalina..."

...which reminds me, have you read Dave's Book of Bad Songs? Absolooooooootely the funniest thing you'll ever embarrass yourself by laughing out loud at, if you're into pop music of a certain era or eras. Highly recommended.

[Siouxie]

stevie,

OH yes...I now recognize Oklahoma...sorry but it didn't even occur to me...which is stupid since I love musicals!

I'll have to get that book - I've heard it's great!