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August 22, 2006

BULLETIN BULLETIN BULLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

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From Paris' mouth to God's ear.


Maybe he'll strike her doen!

down...dang my typing

“I think women should be confident and strong, and they often underestimate themselves and give in to men.” Video at 6:00, 9:00, 10:00, 2:00, 5:00 and wwww.whataskank.com.

Wondering why I care what Paris thinks makes a girl sexier? Yeah, there'd be something wrong with that.

And thanks for a new thread, Dave.

That article was written by "Heather Honeypot" who sounds like she knows a thing or two about abstinance. *squinting*

“It’s sexier when a girl is flirty but she doesn’t do anything.”

"It's much friendlier when a person is polite but cold and doesn't try to make friends with you. And it's much firey-er when they're not actually on fire."

That said, she probably has a point.

Those five words make me feel dirty in this context.

Article fails to mention that as Paris is a 'skank' and doesn't actually qualify as a woman, she is exempt from this rule. As I'm sure will be stated once the next video in he r"home-video" series is released.

Bulllllllll...? Bull what, Dave?

What if I'm already confident and strong. Do I still have to give up s*x for a year? Mr. North may have a strong opinion on that.

Sorry, SN, but what Paris says, goes :-)

I wonder how long that will last?......... I'm betting about... darn, I lost already.

Am I mistaken leem, or are you currently having s*x on the blog? Becuase that's hott. And could you move a little to the left? Thanks.

*because

On the plus side, since ol' Willy Clinton, the definition of what really is s*x has been narrowed down enough that with a little imagination, you wouldn't have to change any habits anyway.

*Opens one eye, furtively scans blog*

Is she gone yet?

Paris also believes that women should eat all they can and donate at least 85% of the salary to charity.

"Heather Honeypot" sounds like a Bond girl.

I just got a pop-up window warning this is a phishing site ???

And really, what kind of conduct do you expect from a woman named after a hotel? And a french hotel at that.

Kettle calling the pot black....or in her case, the KettleOne calling The Grey Goose slutty

Goat-Yes it does!

Somewhere there is a journalist marking off days on a calendar.

Shouldn't that be "journalist," LFBB, complete with the scare quotes?

*urk*

Well, good thing I hadn't eaten yet.

Why do you dig like long-clawed scavengers
To touch the covered corpse of him that fled
The uplands for the fens, and rioted
Like a sick satyr with doom's worshippers?
Come! let the grass grow there; and leave his verse
To tell the story of the life he led.
Let the man go: let the dead flesh be dead,
And let the worms be its biographers.

Song sloughs away the sin to find redress
In art's complete remembrance: nothing clings
For long but laurel to the stricken brow
That felt the Muse's finger: nothing less
Than hell's fulfillment of the end of things
Can blot the star that shines on Paris now.

Bulllllllllll.........hockey. This tart is very full of it.

not for a year, DavetheRed

*SNORK* @ kitten
THAT was funny.

*bowing* thanks, I'm here all day. Don't forget to tip your wait staff

"Paris Hilton: women should stop sleeping around"

If it gets people such as Paris and her brain dead admirers to stop reproducing, I'm all for it!

Um.. Mud, that is very Hamlet if you know what I mean. A few issues brewing there about our fair tartlet?

*waits for the blog boys to bully on tonymus for such a crazy idea*

Yesman: "Uh, Paris - you DO know that a year is 365 days, don'tcha?"

Paris: *head tilted poodle style* "Why, sure!"

Yesman: "And that's also 365 NIGHTS"

Paris "WHAT!!!!???" *faint*

*snork* Punkin

Am I the only person in the world who thinks this chick could use one good @ss whippin'.
And I don't mean that in the good way.
Ladies? Volunteers?

Why, Blurk? To knock some "sense" into her? The best we could do is dislodge the pea.

Why bother?

It wouldn't take much, Blurk. She only weighs 90 pounds. I'll volunteer for the first shot

I once knew a girl named Paris
Who had a magnificent ass;
Not rounded and pink,
As you probably think---
It was grey, had long ears, and ate grass.


CH-True! "OK, who's got Pariswatch this week?"

A little liberty with someone else's limerick sorry, >.<

These pronouncements are coming from the mouth of the Pantyless Wonder? Sheesh.

She's also selling her bed, which, to me, should be donated to the nearest CSI lab. I would put up a link, but don't know how.

Find it interesting that all of those noncritial, nonhypocritcal, nonjudgmental folks who claim they are the salt of the earth and that only folks who go to church are hypocrites, are making critial, judgmental and downgrading statements in this thread. Nice to see that you're committing the same mistakes the church going hypocrites do, but because you don't go to church it makes you better. Love the logic.

She misses me.

snork

bazoomage...boogers...nekkid people


PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE move on to the humor.....

Chill out, RB.

Man, someone's got their knickers in a twist today, hmmm?

Let me guess: You were all excited, because Paris said she'd date you, but only for the next year. Oops, eh?

*snork* Clean...but that's NOT what I meant!

I think it's safe to say that most people are hypocrites in one form or another--we all hold higher ideals than what we can personally live up to. However, when someone goes on public record contradicting their well-known lifestyle with a preachy tone, it's hard not to call foul.

Right on, Betsi. Bravo.

And, I quote: "Look, something shiny!" :-)

This blog is inevitably going to attract folks who are mainstream Americans - which means that they're most likely to have some level of personal faith, and will also probably participate in organized religion.

It's also likely to attract a somewhat outsized share of folks who do not participate in organized religion, either because of their faith, or their lack thereof.

It's also, sadly, inevitable that these two groups will occasionally come to loggerheads, in spite of the humorous intent and content of this blog.

For the love of humor - and each other!! - can we rise above it, and just enjoy the laughs together?

Please?

Thanks.

Yeah, what Clean said.

First of all.. HA!

second.. I'm not the only one who thinks Paris looks like someone squished her head in a vice, right?... I mean, it's just too narrow.

I'm with clean. Let's keep this blog an oasis of boogers in a sea of snark.

it's a world of laughter, a world or tears
its a world of hopes, its a world of fear
theres so much that we share
that its time we're aware
its a small world after all

CHORUS:
its a small world after all
its a small world after all
its a small world after all
its a small, small world

There is just one moon and one golden sun
And a smile means friendship to everyone.
Though the mountains divide
And the oceans are wide
It's a small small world

(chorus)

I have a sudden urge to go to Disney

nooooo - fivver - I was trapped in that ride for 45 minutes at the tender age of 12 - in Holland.

*looks around for little puppets in wooden shoes sitting on windmills stalking her*

*I* have a sudden urge to kill fivver.

Funny - I have a sudden urge to smack fivver.

and Kum-by-yah and amen.

can we move back to the scintillating subject at hand?

has it occurred to anyone that she HAS to abstain until her rash or whatever clears up?

just wonderin'

ohh - a simul with someone other than myself - how refreshing :-)

Betsi - It's a painful world, afterall, right?

fivver, you might wanna start duckin'. The blog beauties are comin' out swingin'.

ahhhh. *lights cigar, pours glass of tequila*

*ears on alert*

tequila??

fivver, that was unkind in the extreme. You're making me want to make an exception.

:-D

Must go listen to some Rob Zombie now to clean out my ears.

I didn't want to cross that threshold but it had to be done.

*jumping back and forth over threshold*

NOW can I get some tequila???

extremely painful Punkin'...

Ah. I feel better. The urge to commit mayhem has passed.

Now I can return to my regularly-scheduled music.

Sorry Gypsi, I had a work simulation project to attend to for a couple of minutes there. *pours tequila*

Hypocrites!
I hate Paris.
That slut.
She looks like Mr. MGoo.
Nasty Wh*re.
Religon or not, Loggerheads or no loggerheads, the only true test is to ask for a show of hands of those who would "do" her.

of course I mean GypsY!

ahhh - finally!

Thanks Fivver

I answer to pretty much anything, except Paris

(This show of hands will correspond closely to those who have recently had their shots...)

spike, this is one time I can honestly say I ain't raisin' my hand.

.....and we already know Matt's "in."

nope - even if I was a guy of the male persuasion

*sittin' firmly on my hands*

Even if she weren't, well, Paris, there's the fact that Mrs. Hands is just about to deliver my fourth daughter any day now, and I can't think of a quicker way to die than to express any form of interest in another woman when one's carrying your child.

Just sayin'.

Dear Reality Bites:Who said we're non-critical, non-judgemental, or non-hypcritcal?Do you think we blog here because WE'RE HEALTHY? you might want to give your head a shake after you run the wa(r)shcloth through your head once more.If we're not making fun of Paris or Barry manilow, we're searching the web for articles on the biggest ball of earwax on earth.By the way, church services here start at 11:00 Am eastern time sunday mornings!

Gypsy...I think it would be more interesting for the rest of us if you loved her....just the way you are.

hey congrats Clean - and very smart.

Spike - doncha just wish?!!...LOL

Clean....Been there, done that, understand. You're exempt.------

One abstaining.

8/22/2006 5:17:05 PM

Anyhow, what on Earth could be sexier than an 8-month-pregnant gal?

So long as it ain't Paris.

*shudder*

Spike, if by "do" you mean run over her with my SUV, then yes....I'd do her in a heartbeat!

(This blog is not intolerant or discriminatory - we hate all skanky ho-bags equally)

oh man CH, the only thing worse than Paris would be pregnant Paris. God forbid that woman ever procreates.

why yes Punkin, I agree - I'd do her too, draggin' her skank bag o' bones up the mountain behind my Ford - chummin' for bear, as it were

Gypsy - I love you.

:x to Punkin

Big *snork* @ Punkin'

were I still in Florida, I'd take her to my favorite fishin' hole and see what size gator I could catch

'course, gators and bears are probably to smart to risk catching some type of flesh rotting disease by eating her skanky a$$

What self-respecting gator would go for that bait?

Even in Florida, gator's gotta have some standards.

my point exactly Clean

*puts on thinking cap*

is there anything that would feast on Paris? Something with the thought capacity of a gnat perhaps? - but really big teeth

Heh. Instead of a "dead pool," we could put together a "skank pool" -- how long before Paris finds True Love® and breaks her vow of "chastity?"

Dibs on 34 days.

Maybe a sarlac™, Gypsy?

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