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July 27, 2006

ST. LOUIS STRUMPDATE

Some terrifyingly young people who claim to read the blog came and gave us Krispy Kreme doughnuts for Edgar, who by the way is still dead.

Strumpdatestlouis_1

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Oh, how cute!

*blushes at the thought of previous comments made mostly by BLURKIE that could be misconstrued by novice purveyors of blogdom*

*wide-eyed look*

*attempts to formulate comment appropriate for pictured blog audience*

*fails*

This is seriously rattling the foundation of my world, Dave.

*head explodes*

Well, don't blame me. After all the complaining you/Dave avoid(s) St. Louis, just using the area for crazy news pieces, I managed to not be watching the blog and unaware when you/he finally came.

Bah.

I'm not actually much of a fanboy for anything, but after all the mock-bitter complaining I would have had to go.
--
Words of the Sentient:

The pursuit of social justice probably accounts for most human misery. -- Walter Williams

Wait a second - after I posted, the donuts disappeared...who ate the donuts? They were just there a second ago!

Dave looks kinda guilty, but he always looks like that. Maybe Ridley....hmmm.

Annie - hold me?

Dave's got that look of "Children read this blog - for Peter's sake, people! You KNOW who you are - shame, shame!"

KAZ: you're saying that in the past three weeks of almost daily blogging of the 'events' page on davebarry.com, you never bothered to look? SIGH.

Heheheh, Annie said peter....

And the point goes to judi!

uh...Hi kids

Who do these young readers belong to?

inappropriate comments???? here???


/nick WasntMe

KDF - not in front of the kids...what kind of a blog do you think this is?

KAZ - time out, mister. And no Nickelodeon tonight, either.

we need to keep that door blocked Dave!

wow

i had no idea the blog had a rated g audience

this changes everything

somebody's gonna hafta do somethin about blurker

yeah...blurker!

Annie, Blurk, etc. ya got it all wrong. Where are these children's parents? why don't they more carefully watch their children? Do these kids have to explain the comments to their parents? Do they have to teach their parents html?

It's all Blurkie's fault! Let's get him!

*throws donut*

we're gonna have to get a new anagram: DNOIYAAYC (ADRAFTPE!)

I blame global warming ...

Clearly, this is Al Gore's fault. He invented the internet after all.

pssssst - wyo - don't tell anyone, but blurker is al gore

*snork* TCK I knew Al couldn't make a living writing or speaking. Gotta moonlight as an MP.

EEEK!!! Al Gore slanted the blog?

note to self: avoid italics whilst drinkin

pssst, TC, the children

non-alcoholic healthy refreshments right TCK??

drinking? whose drinking? *hic*

um right

yeah

um, barley juice anyone?

Hmmm...Children of the Blog....

Is it just me, or do those cute little tykes bear a striking resemblance to the kids in that "Children of the Corn" movie...

I think that The Davester should be afraid, really, really afraid...

just driking white grape juice here :)

and an *n* too

Apparently Blurkerino is not here. Don't worry man, I gotcha back.. Be gentle with Blurk guys, he's fragile.

Am I the only one who can't decipher Judi's new anagram?

Sarah J's 10:10 made more sense than any of us.

a fragile MP?

*snork*

don't think so - i've seen MP's wade into a bar full a marines and rangers dukin it out, with nuthin more than a night stick and a wickid smile - when the dust cleared, rangers were bleedin and marines were cryin like little girls

snork @ Jazzzz

Siouxie, how old is the "grape juice" you're "driking"?

TCK, bet those weren't Air Force MP's.
*fondly dusts off Army VFW hat*

wyo - those would be army MP's - some of em were chicks - big, hairy, scarey chicks - all with that wickid smile

i think the air force guys are "SP's"

in defense of the air force tho, i did have an SP tell me once that if i walked across that red line again, he would shoot me - i believed him

Sounds like their favorite night is 24 night. That would be good.

even SP's guns fire. You made the right choice.

*goes to look at the wine-in-a-box grape juice bottle* ...2005 - a good year for uh...grape juice, Wyo

I probably make more sense because I'm sober

I'll bet dollars to Krispy Kreme donuts that the nice lady next to Dave is the BlogKids' mom.

"Hi, BlogKids' mom!!"

On the other hand, if she is the babysitter, I have a message for the BlogKids' mom:

"Better get a NannyCam, BlogKids' mom -- you would not believe the places your kids are going or what they're reading on the internet when you're not there!"


(Just kidding. Took my kids to the signing in Illinois too. But they are NOT ready for this blog.)

they look remarkably well adjusted for having read the blog...wait...the kid on the left is WEARING A BLUE SHIRT!

I think the woman in the picture is an older sister, not their mom.

(did I score any points?)

*zips in LTTG*

This is scary.

I'm glad I've always behaved myself. I'm probably a role model for all these sweet innocent children.

And to those who aren't, and you know who you are, I say,
TSK, TSK, TSK....

You'll notice that, unlike Toto, I had no problem closing my italics.

I've got about 20 teenagers in my house having a party so yeah I need that grape juice :)

I made them put a sign on my door that says "Do Not Disturb - Drunken Mom"

My dad was an Army MP - I still won't cross him. He's one tough Irishman. Almost as tough as his mom.

Siouxie, pass me one of those "gumballs" if ya got any left.

Just a quick story....not off topic...really ;-)

I happened to have a glass of wine the other day, when my 4 yr old looked at me and asked, "What are you drinking?" "Ummm, aaahhh" I gracefully replied. He responded with "Oh, I know! That's Mommy Juice!, isn't it?" "Yep, I said, that's exactly what it is."

New Parental Philosphy: If my kids aren't warped by age 6, I feel that I am failing as a parent.

*also passes mommy juice to all the mommies that need some*

Hi, I'm Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa and I'm a repeat offender.

Bloglits: "Hello Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa."

*enters twelve-step program*

thank you Lucy :) I'm having my Mommy Juice as we type!
and Wyo, all gone - tough night here

El-Yeah, I'm buyin' it. ;-)

*waves "HI" to my new best friend Mary" (the BlogKids Mom)

Big audience tonight. Lots of fun.

Lisa makes grape juice nervous.

Wyo-Not if they got some at the twelve-step center. ;-)

and happy birthday, sly.

Happy B'day sly.

And if I DIDN'T say it in the other thread, let me add Happy B-Day to Sly, and since I guess the pic is of Mary, Happy B-Day to you as well, whenever it may be!

Okay everyone, settle down! I admit it. The children belong to me. And before someone calls DFS, I want you all to know they read a VERY edited version of the blog. The two younger ones aren't even allowed to watch PG-13 movies, for heaven's sake!

The boys just happen to be big 24 fans, so I let them have a peek now and then.

As for whoever is kind enough to think I am their sister, God Bless You.

PS They all had a great time tonight!

Hi mary the blogkids mom!

Wyo-My twelve-step program is to break my habit of making "questionable" posts on the blog. Wine is welcome, as long as it doesn't make me lose my inhibitions. ;-)

Lisa BFF - you have inhibitions? And you left them where - in your catsuit, perhaps?

*Waves a huge Welcome! banner to Mary the Blogkids' Sister Mom and offers a wholesome and extends a long-distance handshake in front of seven witnesses to the Blogkids*

Now, please tell me how you edit this blog.....

....and how you define "strumpet" for them.

Oh, and hi and happy birthday to Sly. Perhaps we'll be seeing a picture of you and your friend on a stick later!

Please insert "smile" after "wholesome" above. And then please insert another shot of vodka in my glass.

....and how do you explain "simuls" to them....

Annie-I know I have some here somewhere. Let me check the boxes in the garage.

*waves to Mary TBM* Hi!!! lovely kids too!

Meanie -- If there is something I think they will enjoy, I simply print it out and use my Sharpie to black out any inappropriate material.

Surprisingly, there is sometimes actual text left for them to read. Usually, it is from Eleanor.

Mary, do you need a bulk rate on sharpies?

Thanks, Mary. Yeah, Eleanor's euphemisms are usually subtle enough to get by just about anyone ;-)

Seriously, you're a helluva darned good Mom to go through all that for your kids.

yay - they're gone!!!

and wow Mary that's a lotta editing

Wyo/Siouxie -- Yes, it is a lot of editing/Sharpies. But by doing so, I've convinced my kids that this blog is really just about Fat Edgar, 2005 Barry Manilow calendars and toilets. All very wholesome topics.

Mary, in that case:

*snork* @ doughnuts for Edgar! YAY St. Louis Blogkids!!!

mary the blogkids mom: cute kids and kudos for getting them started down the wrong right path early!

mother lies for mary and the other mom's of readers"

simulposts: when two or more persons post at the same time. nothing naughty there.

strumpet: someone who sells books to adoring fans

blurkie: totally harmless man who makes grownup jokes.

i think i could spin the blog to my kids for a couple more years. after that, doomed, doomed, i say.

Adorable kids, Mary.

Edgar LIVES!

Snork at the Mommy juice. If there is a beverage I don't want my 3 yr old to taste - soda, coffee, alkeehawl, I just tell her that it's yucky. So she calls it Mommy's Yucky.

Okay, so kids reading the blog, please do not click on any links posted by the guy with the fake name ending in 'Jeeves'. Thank you.

TCK, bet those weren't Air Force MP's.
*fondly dusts off Army VFW hat*
- as a woman married to a veteran Army MP who is currently a cop, I agree and have new found respect for wyo cowboy.

And to whomever accused Blurk of being Al Gore, I'd watch your back. He is NOT going to like that.

All that being said - GOOD FRIDAY MORNING BLOG!!

All right people, what's all this blamin' me for corrupting the children? Huh? Punkin? Annie? Siouxie? 24-Aholic? Anyone wanna answer? Do I need to go back to previous threads (or this one for that mattter) and do a little copyin' and pastin'?
*waits for someone to fess up*

I won't even get into the Army vs. Air force cop debate. I'll just say that we actually carry loaded weapons.

Hmph.

Blurk, we all blame you for corrupting us!

And water pistols don't count

hmmm oh HI BLURK!!

*runs and hides in other thread*

Coward! I'll stay and fight

Floozie...er...Siouxie, chicken!

And about the Al Gore comment...I'll talk to you guys later.

I warned you all! Now we'll be subjected to Blurk's cold shoulder today!

yes Blurkie??? *smiles innocently*

*loads grenades, beer, chips, dip, charcoal, burgers, snakes, spiders, water color paint and extra ammo into burk's humvee*

I can't believe you didn't defend me. I wasn't even here to fight.

Now, go sit in the corner with 24 and think about this for awhile.

Move over fivver, we got a mission to execute.

Wait, you have snakes and spiders? I give up.

Still a relative newbie here -- who is Edgar?

I want you all to know that my children are right now reading every word of this thread and are now totally confused.

On a more positive note, Jane, the youngest Blogkid was so inspired by last night's presentation that she has already written a five-page story (single-spaced), complete with illustrations.

So see, good does triumph afterall.

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