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May 09, 2006

MOM OF THE MONTH SO FAR

(Thanks to Bill Hudgins)

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No idea what this article is about, but no one else commented, and that is enough.

FIRST? Sounds like a motherly thing to do. Mothers are always helpful.

Ah, well. At least I have the moral first-ness.

Maybe those Colorado girls who got in trouble for delivering cookies some time ago should deliver another batch. What do you think?

"She also asked Judge LaVerdiere to relax Hunt's bail conditions"..She moved that the defendant not be bound or restricted from her daily duty..

Jail time for ex-lax cookies? Puh-leeze!

Can't even make $100 bail?! She must be living in a rented trailer.

No she just spent all her money on laxitives and plubmers.

What? I don't get it! My mom calls them chocolate chips.... mmmMMMMMmmm ....

Sean said "duty"! Hee

♪ Teach....your children well... ♫

So that's why teachers share with their students - taste-testers!

My kids have had some highly irregular teachers, but this is ridiculous.

Mrs. Hunt: Now, girls, did you crush the pills like I showed you?
(looks in batter) No, you didn't! Do I have to do everything myself?

Daughter: But, Mooooooom....

Mrs. Hunt: It's all about absorption! With those giant lumps, your teacher will just think it was some bad meatloaf in the cafeteria! We want cramps so bad she'll won't stand up straight for a week!

Daughter: When Jimmy made a pipe bomb to blow up the shop teacher, his dad didn't help him!

Mrs. Hunt: And look what happened? Just a concussion and two fingers lost on his left hand! If I'd made it, he'd be Educator Bisque!

Daughter: How'm going to learn for myself?

Mrs. Hunt: Just watch me, dear, and wipe the bowl well. For fingerprints.

When are parents going to learn that their children aren't supposed to think they're cool? Indeed, when are parents going to learn to start parenting? My mother has always said it's part of her job description to be an embarrassment to me. This mother is emulating Amy Poehler in Mean Girls, methinks.

...must... stop... reading the blog. Have to... go on air... in ten minutes...

Couldn't resist...

And where's the girl's father, Mr. Hunt? Mike?

they're probably divorced and the girl's told mom they were baking a treat for dear old dad.

i read that one on news of the weird, but it sounded like somebody made it up. guess not. she's quite a mother.

A couple of years ago some friends of mine came into my apartment, pushed me and my roommates out of the kitchen and wedged the door shut so we couldn't open it. They rummaged around our kitchen, opening cabinets and the fridge, pulling things out and putting them back. We were in the back hallway listening to all the noise when suddenly it stopped. We tried the door and it opened easily. The kitchen wasn't too much of a mess, but taped to the door of the refigerator was a note saying they had put ex-lax in 3 food items and would tell us which ones in 72 hours. We didn't eat or drink anything liquid that had been opened before they came. We worried about it for three days at which point they called and told us they hadn't done anything to our food. We got them back pretty well for that.

*chants* Jerry, Jerry....sorry sarah J, those would have been ex friends.

What is a "plubmer"?

We were having a "prank war" and we started it, so they were still friends after that. Not like the guys who thought shooting plastic baggies full of oatmeal and random gross food bits at our front window with a water balloon launcher would be fun. I'm sure it was loads of fun for them to pay to replace our huge window. They were'nt really friends after that.

No I still think the pot mom has her beat

Every time I hear of someone pullin' a stunt like this, I remember the Jean Shepherd story about Boomo-Lax ... NEbuddy know the name of that episode? I can't find it at the moment ...

This reminds me of the Firesign Theatre jingle: "You can't get loose if you don't get the boost, the boost you get from loosners" (castor oil flakes).

I didn't read the whole article, but on a side note:
Those are some peppy car models in the ad on top.

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