IF YOU'RE LOOKING TO LOSE NINE STONE (AND WHO IS NOT?)

Here's the diet for (ribbit) you.

Comments

[daisymae]

First and I ain't looking to lose nutin', honey!

[daisymae]

Is the nine stone like kidney stones, or like nine stone as a measure of weight? and if the second, how much weight is nine stone?

[daisymae]

♪ All alone again...♪

[Betsy]

I think 9 stone is about 126 pounds, Daisy.

I want to know how he got "separated from his vehicle". Did the snakes carry it off while he was taking a bathroom break Out Back? or were there fermented beverages involved?

And, of course, I plan to spend the day singing "spiders and snakes" under my breath.

[Eleanor]

Good morning daisy!
I'm here and FOURTH, I think!

How's it going?

I hate it when Stones go Missing WWBAGNFAundergroundRB.

[Eleanor]

OK.

Fifth. But it's Betsy so that's OK.

[daisymae]

Hey, Betsy & El...good morning. Missed you guys. It's terrible what going to work does to my blogging time.

Thanks, Betsy, that's more than I weigh, so I definitely don't want to lose any stone.

El, I left you a post on another thread (when I found you sobbing, poor dear), then I fell asleep and haven't been back. It looks like everything's okay today?

Gotta go, but I'll be back later today.

[Suzy Q]

Hmmm......9 stone....126 pounds....divided by pi.....carry the 2....multiply by 30...... Yep! That would make me the size of a toddler. No thanks!

[judi]

a stone is 14 pounds.

and check out the "sex helps your golf drive" link at the bottom of that page, eh?

[numex]

"face down in a hole" WWBAGNFAundergroundRB

[numex]

"Anxiety becomes even more of an obstacle to attaining optimal performance in concentration-intense sports like golf." That is my goal when I am on the course - attaining optimal performance. Nothing takes a backset to that.

[bbescuela]

I know you'd have to have some pretty big stones to go on that diet, but 14 pound stones? Let's just say, I wouldn't mess with that dude.

[Thumper]

wow - if I had a nickel for every time I've become separated from (couldn't find) my vehicle and woke up face down in a hole....

[azred]

eureeka! if I loose 9 stone, I can be the invisible woman. **wanders off to smash chemistry set and make list of people to haunt**

[sharon share-alike]

Somehow, when that woman in the "come and spend all your money in Australia" tourism commercial asks "So where the bloody hell are ya?", the answer "Separated from my vehicle and face down in a hole" never really occurred to me as a possible answer.

[russell]

Breakfast: Weasel Poop Beans (preferably chalky white "old" beans) $4.65

Lunch: Crunchy Frog Surprise $7.75

Dinner: Ram's Bladder Cup with a hint of Lark's Vomit
$8.99

Losing your stones in the wilderness --- Priceless

[Eleanor]

Good morning Sharon! We were just talking about you over here. Come and say hello - blogits are waiting for you. :)

*zips out to find where she was sobbing*

[puppytoes]

nine stones sounds like a lot. and, if daisymae is correct, it must have been a bitch passing 'em all. (ouchie)

[slyeyes]

... he became separated from his vehicle and woke up "face down in a hole".

Hey! They left out the best part of the story.

[MoFaux]

I've been watching Rachel Ray's show on thirty minute meals for awhile now, -just for the cooking , mind you, not because she has a cupie doll smile, and her frog/lizard/marsupial dish with tangy salsa dip is the best EVER! But seriously, folks,when it comes to outback dining,nothin beats the refreshing flavor of "musky Kangaroo pouch stew" :
Ingedients: 1 musky Kangaroo pouch
2 cups dirt,finely sifted through your own dirty hands-dont rush this part!
1 teaspoon of any non-poisonious
weed-I use my naval to get a teaspoon full- and a pound of sand fleas-trust me, you'll have the time to find them. add water, if possible, wait two weeks and ENJOY!

[Meanie the Blue]

But does golf improve the sex drive? Fore! (play)

[MoFaux]

BTW: Twentieth!

[insomniac]

When it looks like Fred Couples
And Davis gets himself Love
Will John do it Daly?
Below par, or above?

Do the throes of high passion
Make Mrs. Vijay Singh?
If Retief starts to Goosen
Will his putter go 'ping!'

So S*x lowers stresses
Both the bads and the goods
And unattached ladies
Dream about Tiger's Woods

[O. the U(manity)]

Dang!

Blessed St. Judi beat me to the noticing of the "Golf/Sex Drive" item ... why am I not surprised?

[ArcticAl]

Sounds like a normal Saturday night around here - losing the car and waking up face down.

*note to self: try to cut down on intake of homemade beer and wine*

[Eleanor]

And unattached ladies
Dream about Tiger's Woods

Yes, insom, you can say that again!
*sigh*

[Annie Where-but-here]

I lost twice that when I became separated from my ex.

Australian male, loses vehicle, face down in hole... this may be a stretch, but I'm guessing alcohol was involved. And I agree, that was a heck of a 'yadda yadda.'

Golf really does improve sex. While you're out golfing, your mate has plenty of time to improve her 'game.'

[Sondra]

Obviously, this man was kidnapped (and thrown back) by aliens. We should study him, to find out how to be rejected by aliens. Does anyone know how to apply for a government grant?

He should probably be studied in many situations:
How he reacts to bright lights in the sky (Las Vegas),
How he reacts to being mistreated (Paris sidewalk cafe),
How he reacts to alien beings (Galapagos Islands),
How he reacts to being in a hole in the ground (London Subway)
etc.

[Eleanor]

Oops, I forgot his Wood. :)

[Michael Garmahis]

Amazing diet!

[Annie Where-but-here]

The really scary part is that the guy is now....sober!
So, of course, he'll have to be deported.

[Alfred]

Yes, you really can lose a lot of weight when malnurished.

Reminds me of being in Cross Country. I thought I had to eat less to be in shape. Went days with out eating. My Coach then explained something to me.

"You are going to lose everything you ate in one run." In other words, runners need food desperatley.

Walking around a desert eating frogs. I bet he could make a mint selling that to certain people in Sedona Arizona.

[Sarah J]

Because everyone knows Sedona is the home of rational thinking? Or are there just too many frogs?

[O. the U(manity)]

Sedona Arizona anagrams to ... um ... somethin' else I haven't yet figgered out ... merely sayin' ...

[bbescuela]

How about "a rad insane zoo?

[O. the U(manity)]

Werks fer me ...

[Annie Where-but-here]

I think Alfred was saying that many people in Sedona have too much money and not enough common sense.

[daisymae]

Snork @ Meanie for 'but does golf improves the sex drive'...my question, too.

However, what is *the* sex drive (sounds like part of the car)? I get that there's a *my* sex drive or *your* sex drive, or *his* or *her* sex drive...but ...as O.U would say...'merely askin'.

[daisymae]

And, of course, snork @ insom.

[Mew]

People here in Paris pay good money for frog...but only the legs.

[Mew]

Uh oh, I've killed the blog.

[Annie Where-but-here]

It's ok, Mew...you just scared off the boys with all your talk of questionable sex drives.

[Mew]

My talk of questionable sex drives? Huh? *looks highly confused*

[Annie Where-but-here]

Whoops...my bad, Mew... I got you confused with daisymae...must be your haircut?

[Mew]

You mean there's someone else in the world with a half of a polka-dotted mohawk?

[Annie Where-but-here]

Er, yeah....*backs away slowly*

[Mew]

There I go, scaring people off again...*sigh*

[me]

But of course it does! The Golf Channel constantly airs ads for 'male enhancement' products. It's like listening to your spam inbox. Only worse, because you get to hear about how happy 'Bob' is now, and see how he goes around smiling like he's trying to pass 9 stone . . .

[Mew]

Me-You listen to your spam box? Does it speak often?

[Annie Where-but-here]

Mew - I think you scared me away.

[Annie Where-but-here]

omg! Kiefer Sutherland is in "The Wild"!?! I had no idea! I'm being dragged to that movie later tonight. Shatner's in it, too. I wonder if Kiefer gets to shoot anyone in the thigh. Most animals don't have opposable thumbs to operate weapons.

[Alfred]

To Mew, Here

I found that looking up the word. "Belly Button"

So which do you prefer the sandwedge or the nine iron?

Yes, Sedona has many people with little sense, and way to much money. We could import the frogs.

[Alfred]

Sorry that one was really awful.

Try this.

[Adonis]

KDF is in no way in shape or form creepy. She is awesome and much cooler than I.

[AFKA tsktsk]

Sex helps your golf game??? So that's why I suck (nononono, NO intended pun here...move along, nothing to see...)

[RumorMill]

Adonis says KDF isn't in shape

[Adonis]

I think I shall put the rumor mill in one of these. I can get in enough trouble as it is.

[LucyVanPelt]

Way OFF Topic Warning!

Anyone a fan of Tom Cauvanaugh?

If so the almost famous, and unfortunately short lived, Love Monkey is back on VH1 and they will be finishing out the series!

[LucyVanPelt]

(echoing) Hello....Hello....Hello?

[LucyVanPelt]

Does this mean what I think it does?

Bwwhhaaahaa....the blog is mine, all mine!

[LucyVanPelt]

*sips drink, sits back, watching Jack Johnson on Austin City Limits*

Thinking to self *Pretty roomy in the blog....I could chill here for a while.

[daisymae]

LOL Lucy

[LucyVanPelt]

Thanks Daisy.

Now anyone have any ideas of what we can do to the blog while everyone is away?

[LucyVanPelt]

*Turns up the music, continues sipping drink and begins to "get rowdy".

*Realizes that nobody else is here again and cranks the music, chugs her drink, and commences total uncalled for out of control rowdiness!

[O. the U(manity)]

All right folks, nothin' happenin' here, nothin' to see ... move along now ...

[LucyVanPelt]

Ahhhh-Haaaaa, I have involved you in my evil plan!

Now U.O. may I offer you a drink!

[LucyVanPelt]

Pardon O.U. nout U.O., I blame the drink.

[LucyVanPelt]

That's it, 2 beers and time for bed. Goodnight Blog.

[O. the U(manity)]

LVP -

No problem ... I answer to many different nomenclatures ... merely requestin' that y'all don't call me late to supper ... or a party ...

[Betsy]

Soup's on!!!

[Stupendous Man]

Back to the thread: this guy must have been really huge when he became separated from his car and took the Atkins Diet to new limits. But was he really overweight? I, for one, don't think you can be considered overweight unless you step on your dog's tail.....and he dies.

[Mr. Completely]

Alfred - Who do you know that lives in Sedona?

[daisymae]

*breezes in*

Good morning! Where's El with the bloody mary's she promised?

*breezes out to look for El*

[Eleanor]

Here ya go, daisy!
I think we need omelets too. It's a little early to get totally snockered, doncha think? :)

Maybe not.

[sharon share-alike]

Definitely not. That's what holidays are for! I brought mimosas.

[Suzy Q]

Mimosas! Cool! I love me some mimosas.

[Eleanor]

I love mimosas too but you have to be careful when you google them because you can get these, which, even when pureed in a blender, are not tasty. :)

[daisymae]

Thanks, El.

Is it late enough for margaritas?

[Eleanor]

Well, it's almost noon here on the Left Coast....
and it's Sunday...

and for most people Easter services are over....

In summary, why not! :)

[Sondra]

We made Mango Margarita's at my restaurant last night.

Indescribably delicious.

[daisymae]

I like Mango just about anything.

(being from So Fla)

[sharon share-alike]

Oh my...it would seem I inadvertantly brought yucky, bitter, non-mango flavored flowers instead of the yummy drinks I intended. I guess I'll have to learn to post links to avoid such faux-pas in the future!

[O. the U(manity)]

Yeah, mangoes are perty tasty ... when they're local ...

We got used to mango for breakfast @ Kona ... now MB(RH?) won't even consider buyin' them @ the local grocery stores ... she's sure we'd be disappointed ... merely rememberin' ... how good they are ...

[Meanie the Blue]

OK, I can take a hint, ss-l (why do I call you ss-l when your initials are really ss-a? Well, ss-a would just be b*ss-ackwards).

To post a link, type the following with the substitutions indicated:

<A HREF="the URL of your link goes here, WITH the quotes">the on-screen text for your link goes here, WITHOUT quotes</A>

Make sure there's a space between A and HREF, and no extra spaces elsewhere.

Take-home test to be turned in tonight.

[sharon share-alike]

Like this?

Thanks blue. You can call me what you like--I'll just think of "ss-l" as an affectionate nickname (sharon seems loquatious? sharon sniffs lupins? I'll have to to think on that).

[Meanie the Blue]

A+ on the linkage, for both technique and content. How about Sharon share-alink?

[Meanie the Blue]

Um.....worked on the wrong version of you there, Sharon. Make it: Sharon shares links?

[O. the U(manity)]

Well, when I made that error (the first time) I'm guessin' that I wuz thinkin' (?) that it was for Sharon shara like ... ... or somethin' ... that's my excuse, and I'll hafta stick to it, 'cuz I got nothin' better ...