TRAVEL ADVISORY

I will be traveling across the country today, so I'll be unable to blog much, as I will have to focus all of my mental energy on keeping the plane in the air despite the fact that it is a giant heavy truck-like thing that has no business whatsoever flying, or even rolling fast on the ground. I'm returning from Walnut Creek, Calif., where I had a fine evening last night. Earlier yesterday, humor writer Malcolm Fleschner presented me with a really classy T-shirt (that's Malcolm holding it below). I plan to wear it around Miami, where I will no doubt be hit on constantly by hot female walruses.

Comments

[JT]

Fitdy!

[JT]

CRUD.

[JT]

Once again, the thrill of being first was too much for me to stay coherent...

[LucyVanPelt]

Anything is possible in Miami. In fact if you wore that t-shirt, and didn't get hit on by female walruses in Miami, I would be worried!

[Leetie]

Awesome shirt!!

[O. the U(manity)]

I certainly hope that the older female walruses (walrusi?) have better eyesight than this old male walrus ... that itty-bitty print is kinda hard to read ... unless I get my moustache really close to the screen ... merely sayin' ...

[Bumble]

Dave~ Just don't switch your "wings stay on/wings fall off" button and you should be fine. According to Larson, it's very close to the "recline" button.

*wishes she could find images of Far Side comics online*

[CoastRaven]

SOOOOOO - What about your oosik?

[Meanie, the Blue]

Tusk, tusk, Dave. I would not wear that around Mrs. Blog if I were you.

[morty]

http://www.freakyzoo.com/FurryLobster.html
I don't know how to turn this into a link but you guys gotta see this!

[JT]

It's probably not a good idea to visit this place while wearing your shirt.

http://parks.ky.gov/stateparks/bb/index.htm

[Bumble]

morty~ Like this.

[JT]

Bumble, could you be so kind as to do that on the link I posted?

[Bumble]

Certainly.

[Bumble]

And a *snicker* to you both.

[slyeyes]

Snickers, yum.

[Lairbo]

Is that an oosik t-shirt or are you just happy to... oh, nevermind.

[Bumble]

And a Snickers for sly.

[LucyVanPelt]

For those that are HTML challenged (such as myself) I have found the easiest way to make links is This

[Hedwig]

Did anyone happen to notice that the state park in Kentucky is on Beaver Road? I'm just sayin...

[Meanie, the Blue]

JT - I like "Fitdy!". It brings back a kind of innocence to the whole jaded First! thing. A nostalgic SNORK! to you for that.

[JT]

Thanks, Blue...glad that you saw I was "kidding around" and that my post was "intentional." Yeah, that's it...

[Somewhere North]

Does the T-shirt mean that Walter wasn't allowed on the plane and had to fly in the baggage compartment? Does that mean female walruses might be engaging in s*xual activity in the baggage compartment? And how does multiple walrus orgies in the baggage compartment affect the balance of the plane?

Hmmm.. better not to think about it while you're up there.

[Meanie, the Blue]

You're welcome, KY.

[slyeyes]

Thanks, Bumble.

[Tamara Rhymes With Camera]

Great shirt! I want one!

[insomniac]

or..."My other oosik is attached."

[morty]

Bumble and LVP - Thanks. I'll give it a shot soon!
'preciatecha.

[judi]

snork @ insom!

[Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa]

*snork* @ insom

How about: "I'm with Oosik"

[Reddsuss]

Or "Dave went to Walnut Creek and all we got was this lousy oosik t-shirt"

[Christobol]

I'm partial to "Pull My Oosik" myself.

[Meanie, the Blue]

NTTAWWT, C-Bol. Just use the right lubricant.

[Eleanor]

I love a good oosik joke - *snorks* to everyone! :)

[Eleanor]

Walnut Creek is near Berkeley, my alma mater. I went to the worst movie I've ever seen in my LIFE in Walnut Creek.

But it's a pretty town.

[O. the U(manity)]

Pix of a furry crustacean? Near Easter Island?

OMGawsh!

It's the Easter BunnyLobster!

[Betsy]

Morty...I got to see that on television this morning. It reminded me of when my mother used to send me to school in the winter wearing fuzzy snow-pants. Although I expect lobsters don't have mittens attached to their jackets like I did. Wait...actually, I think they do, at least in the better restaurants.

[Mr. Completely]

El - Okay, I'll bite. What was the worst movie you'd ever seen in your life there in Walnut Creek?

[Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa]

Bumble-But does it play the maracas and sing Copacabana?

[Lairbo]

El:

Along with seconding the question about which movie was so bad, isn't Walnut Creek where you emerge from some Bay Area highway tunnel into an entirely different (from SF) climate?

[judi]

c'mon, malcolm, you know you're reading this. POST.

:-p

[Bumble]

Lisa~ What? The lobster thing? I wouldn't know. I linked it for someone else. And until I saw it in a news article on the yahoo SBC homepage, I thought it was a stuffed animal. Now I think it's a weird animal.

[Malcolm]

Judi,
After spending an evening out with a couple of legendary party animals like Dave and Walter, no one could be expected to be awake and surfing the web at such an ungodly hour. Just to make it home I had to borrow cab fare from Walter's bail bondsman! (wisely, he keeps one on retainer in all fifty states)

[southerngirl]

*snork* at Malcolm!

[JT]

The worst movie EVER was "Voyage of the Rock Aliens" and starred Pia Zadora. For no good reason whatsoever, she sang a duet with Jermaine Jackson. If that's the movie you saw, Eleanor, you have my sympathy.

Not that I am trying to hijak this thread for a discussion of the worst movie of all time, which Dave could turn into a book...

[JT]

The worst movie EVER was "Voyage of the Rock Aliens" and starred Pia Zadora. For no good reason whatsoever, she sang a duet with Jermaine Jackson. If that's the movie you saw, Eleanor, you have my sympathy.

Not that I am trying to hijak this thread for a discussion of the worst movie of all time, which Dave could turn into a book...

[Mr.Fisher]

OOO SICK! I'd love to wear a shirt like that!

But I'm not allowed to wear shirts anymore. Just this comfy old straight jacket's all I need.

Also, just a word of caution;

Don't Let Malcolm in the Middle, of Dave and Walter.

Just sayin.....

[grackyfrogg]

yes, lairbo, you are right. there are two completely different weather systems on either side of the caldecott tunnel! (and some might argue there are two different countries on either side of it, too.)

[PeanutGallery]

Hey, this guy wrote a song about Furry Old Lobsters
a long time ago. He must be psychic! or is that psychotic?

[Edgar Greenberg]

How could you call yourselves blog-literate without knowing html

[Edgar Greenberg]

Alas strikethroughs and underlines don't work on this blog! Dave get yourself an upgrade!

[O. the U(manity)]

There's an irony for you ... the question of "blog-literacy" works, but the so-called "html" link does not ... hmmm? ... merely sayin' ...

(I could also make a reference to non-Dale Carnegie-type behavior/comment patterns, ... hospitality and/or polite manners preclude my doin' that, howsomever ...)

[The Eleanor]

This is how we got there.

SEE - There we are, in line. I was with 2 great-looking guys and when we walked out, we all said in unison, "That was the WORST movie I've ever seen."

[Worn-but-here, The Annie]

If I grow up, I wanna be a humor writer just like Malcolm, only with longer hair....and slightly more makeup...and cabana boys....and a pony.

[Christobol]

*Ways to know your law career isn't panning out*

1) You're on retainer for a walrus penis bone.

*Ways to know it's over*

1) You fondly remember when you used to be on retainer for a walrus penis bone.

[Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa]

Bumble-Yes I meant the fuzzy lobster that you linked to. I thought it was funny.

[Kristen]

http://search.ebay.com/oosik_W0QQfkrZ1QQfnuZ1QQxpufuZx

You, too, can own an oosik. Fox, skunk, racoon, and yes, even walrus, just like Dave.

These items at Ebay are marked "used." Huh? Can you get a "new" one? Or does "used" mean...oh, sick.

Malcolm. Some things are just better bigger. Like FONT size. Great tee shirt, though.

[Malcolm]

Kristen,
I appreciate your criticism. The problem with the photo is that I am the one modeling the T-shirt. As you can probably imagine, when properly adorning Dave's massive pectorals, the font size expands exponentially. I'm sure Dave will be glad to demonstrate for everyone here with another photo, and then perhaps you can inquire whether his oosik remains in mint condition or if it has been somehow, um, despoiled.

[sasha]

Great shirt!!