THERE IS NOTHING WORSE

...than a giant snake behind.

Comments

[Marie in Kourou]

Good morning, Kilties.

*crashes face-first into a couch*

I did not sleep well last night. Just my luck, because in a while I'll have to drag myself to my Russian class. The monsoon season has started again, so I'll probably have to slog through the rain. *sigh*

So how are you all today? I hope you didn't overindulge yourselves with the cupcakes.

[The ASK]

Morning!

Would you believe that with today's schedule, I will not likely be at a computer all day?

[KDF]

AAAACCCCCKK!

Okay, kidding. But please update us with all details when you can. :)

[Meanie the Blue]

Good morning, SIKoes. (SIK = Snakes In Kilts).

*Waits for KDF to bring chains for securing ASK to computer until a thorough update has been given*

*Recognizes that the irresistable allure of imagining KDF with chains will be sufficient to keep ASK right where he is, without benefit of the actual hardware*

[Marie in Kourou]

Whoooohoooo! Early-morning perving, eh Blue?

[Meanie the Blue]

Needed to set a tone for the day. A friendly service that I provide, free of charge.

[KDF]

*jangle, jangle*

[Meanie the Blue]

*SNORK! SNORK!*

[CoastRaven]

Morning all!
I am not going to publicly admit that with the hazy status of my eyes this early in the morning that I first read Marie as crashing "face first into a crotch". I aint gonna admit to that at all.
NTTIAWWT

[Meanie the Blue]

ASK photo posted at Main Blog! Keep the chains here until needed.

[Marie in Kourou]

CR, that made my day. I only wish I had done that.

And now I must leave... *snif* Be back soon, though.

[wolfie]

G'mornin SIKoes (I *heart* that!)

I always overindulge in cupcakes. I remember one night when I had a cupcake in each hand and one on my lap and I was about to lick off their frosting but then the cops showed up and... erm.. I've said too much.
*changes subject*

KDF has chains? *perks*
TY for sharing that image CR. I've reread it several times and now I can't not see MiK diving face first into a crotch.

YaY! for TheAsk.
*is still trying to get over her jealousy*

[sharon share-alike]

*SNORK* @ Coast!

Ahh...I love a good *snork* first thing in the morning.

Dagnabbit, the ASK--I want some DETAILS!!

Must. Find. Coffee. I'll be back later, fellow SIKoes.

[Meanie the Blue]

BTW, better belated than never, Sharon. Have fun educating the youth of America, and be sure and apply the boot as often as needed. (Keep a spare set.)

[Marie in Kourou]

*expletive expletive expletive expletive*
I just walked clear across town on a HOT, SUNNY DAY WITH 4 BILLION PERCENT HUMIDITY!!!!!!! And all for nothing!
My Russian teacher apparently made a mistake in typing my e-mail address, so the message canceling my class didn't get through to me. Dammit.
Oh well. We rescheduled for tomorrow at 5 PM.

I would have crashed face-first into my beloved's crotch this morning... if he liked BJs. But he doesn't, so tough cookies to him.

[CoastRaven]

Never heard of such a thing Marie!! Thats unAmerican!

[KDF]

MiK, that is truly the most shocking thing you have ever said. What? Tough cookies indeed.

[Meanie the Blue]

!!!!! ?????
Makes. No. Sense.

Sorry, Marie.

[Marie in Kourou]

Yeah, well, I live with a total boogerhead. A cute boogerhead who can cook, but a boogerhead nevertheless. He doesn't know what's good for him.

[Meanie the Blue]

Understatement of the new millenium.

[wolfie]

If you drop the tough cookies into a zip!ock bag with a couple slices of soft squooshie bread, they will soften right up overnight.

[KDF]

I'm not touching that, Wolfie.

[wolfie]

D@mn!

[KDF]

*snork*

[CoastRaven]

If you drop wolfie and I into a sleeping bag and a couple shots of Cuervo....eerrr nevermind.

[TC]

doesn't like....

wow Marie - are ya sure he's a guy?

[wolfie]

We sleep it off CR?

*innocent blink*

[Leetie]

Holy crap, Marie!

[Leetie]

What's Eleanor so pissed about?

;)

[moderator]

Don't start that again!

[wolfie]

Will we get punished if we do?

[Marie in Kourou]

Tippi, he has dangly bits, so I'm assuming he's a man.

*wonders where she can get a really, really big ziploc bag*

[wolfie]

Ummm.. he would be kinda reallyyyy useless all squooshie.
just sayin'

[Marie in Kourou]

But see... this way, I'd have him under wraps and he'd be mine, all mine. I'd take him out occasionally to, erm, toughen him up... and then put him away again.

[wolfie]

But he'd get all moldy eventually. And then who would cook for you?

[Marie in Kourou]

*thinks* Yeah, that would suck. Better put the ziploc away. I need my good pickin's.

Have I shocked everyone else into silence? *giggle* You guys don't know the half of it.

[TC]

really? how about sharin' some more of it - we won't tell him - honest we won't

[Meanie the Blue]

Marie - you have made the pun that I dared not.

[wolfie]

.. and this one time, at band camp...

[Marie in Kourou]

Let's just say he needs to work on his bedroom technique. :-)

Mmmmm... will this be a kinky band camp story, Wolfie? Go on.

[KDF]

C'mon, Wolfie, tell us a story. We know it won't blow.

*innocent wide-eyed gaze in Blue's general non-daring direction*

[CoastRaven]

yeah wolfie - we'd all lick to hear!

[wolfie]

Last time I told someone a story I think he short circuited his keyboard with *ahem* drool. And melted his email. Right Thumper?

*runs away very fast*

[Eleanor]

ROFL aat Leetie's remark way ^ there!

*way to show what a great mood she's in today*

CG's coming over, I got free delivery on groceries which will be here in about an hour, I'm all cleaned up!
*sits down on floor and wait to hear wolfie's band camp story*

I have a Jewish camp story, and I was only 13!!!

[Meanie the Blue]

Really putting my discretion to the teste, here, KDF.

*Wouldn't it be so great if a particular bloglit just "zipped in" right about now?*

[The ASK]

bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored
I hate teacher workshops. Teachers are idiots (okay, not all of them, obviously). They ask way too many stupid questions. No wonder the kids get to my class and don't know anything.

[Meanie the Blue]

Uh oh.

[Meanie the Blue]

*Prepares to go down in flames*

[wolfie]

I never went to band camp btw. I played the piano. There wasn't a camp for that. I did go to girlscout camp tho. Several times.
Learned how to make banana boats.

*innocent look*

*blows ask a french kiss*

[KDF]

I hate teacher workshops.

Hey! I said "professional day" just yesterday! That's what i was talking about! (If you'd invited me, ASK, we could have made it a lot more interesting.)

*waits for El to tell her Jewish camp story*

*fans the Blue flames*

[Meanie the Blue]

You ladies have my full attention. Just sayin'.

[KDF]

*pitches Blue's tent so he can camp out at with the SOKkies for as long as he likes*

whispers... KDF is making Blue pitch a tent.. you know what to do with this information...

[CoastRaven]

Almost appropriate joke for the context of the conversation...

A man and woman were having marital problems so they went to see a marriage counselor. The counselor, in an attempt to find some common ground from which to begin his analysis said, "Tell me about anything the two of you have in common."

The husband spoke up and said, "Well, neither one of us sucks d!*k.

[wolfie]

To which the wife responded 'Neither of us eats at the Y either.'

[CoastRaven]

BWAAAHAAHAA @ wolfie!!

[Jeff Meyerson]

Never heard of such a thing Marie!! Thats unAmerican!

Posted by: CoastRaven | 09:59 AM on April 27, 2006

Of course, CR, that's because he's French!

To quote Babs Jansen in Animal House, "That boy needs psychoanalysis!"

[wolfie]

*curtsies*

*is relieved someone understood that*

[Jeff Meyerson]

and this one time, at band camp...

Posted by: wolfie | 11:49 AM on April 27, 2006

(* waits patiently for wolfie to get back to her 'fingering the instrument' story*)

[Jeff Meyerson]

and this one time, at band camp...

Posted by: wolfie | 11:49 AM on April 27, 2006

(* waits patiently for wolfie to get back to her 'fingering the instrument' story*)

[Jeff Meyerson]

I did not double post!

[Eleanor]

A HUGE ROFL to wolfie and Coast!! You guys should take this act on the road - hilarious!

They call me Mellow Yellow

[wolfie]

You just wanted to see wolfie fingering her instrument twice Jeff.

[wolfie]

umm..
*grabs whiteout and removes previous post*

holy cow does that look worse than I thought. Can someone fix my self censor button? I think I blew it's fuse again.

[Jeff Meyerson]

Anything worth saying (or seeing) once is worth doing twice, wolfie.

[wolfie]

And looking at that, I realize I haven't fixed anything.
Has anyone seen my mittens? Can't type in mittens.

[CoastRaven]

That's not ALL you can't do in mittens wolfie!

[Marie in Kourou]

*giggles somewhere off in her corner*
I love the joke, but when are we going to hear a dirty story about Wolfie in the Girl Scouts? Does it involve a uniform malfunctioning?

[wolfie]

..and this one time at band camp...

the (unnecessarily) censored version

Well you see, a bunch of us (we were 19 at the time) were $%&$@ing around with our &^%@#$!%#$s and I thought it would be fun to see if BettySue could get her %#&*& all the way in her *&@#$%^. And she could, but only with some help in the form of my ^$#&$#.
And some spit.
She didn't mind my fingers touching her *(%$&^$ tho cause she was a bit of a ^%@#$ to begin with. Anyway, once we had it *&#$ the @#$ in, she kinda screamed in happiness so we thought we should *^%#@% it around a bit.
Needless to say her %$#@*& was had by all. And we kept in touch for years afterwards. The End.
:-)

[wolfie]

What else can't you do in mittens CR?
*she asks innocently*

[CoastRaven]

ummmm - play the piano?

[Meanie the Blue]

I love organic produce.

[Marie in Kourou]

Hey! No fair! No censoring allowed.

[wolfie]

Yeah Blue. No censoring allowed. Exactly how do you love organic produce?

*ducks sock o'nickles™*

[KDF]

I love it when we find new lows.

No kiddin' Blue, deez iz some gooood berries! apples! grapes! melons!

*drowns in snorkage*

[Marie in Kourou]

In French, mamelons means nipples.

So what Blue is saying is that he loves organic nipples. Aren't they all?

[wolfie]

Soooo not my fault KDF. I'm highly impressionable and easily led by my peers into doing things I shouldn't. Blame them.
*points to the guys*

*adjust girlscout sash and strokes her merit badges*

[Marie in Kourou]

Of course, you have your non-organic mamelons, but nobody likes those, so they're disqualified.

[Marie in Kourou]

Ooooh, can I touch your merit badges, Wolfie? What's this one for?

[wolfie]

mouth to mouth

[Marie in Kourou]

Could you demonstrate, Wolfie? I haven't got that merit badge yet.

[Marie in Kourou]

I nearly died laughing at the "mouth to mouth" post, by the way. Thanks, I needed that.

[Meanie the Blue]

Organic produce should be enjoyed, generally speaking, with a mix of sweet and savory toppings. Mamelons, in particular, should be served well chilled.

And please add to the (still incomplete) list: cherries, mangoes, nuts, tomatos, and the veggies of your choice.

[wolfie]

I aim to please. That is what keeps getting me in trouble.
Btw, your left hand isn't in fact on a badge per say, but please, feel free to keep stroking it.

[Meanie the Blue]

Pairs. Gotta have pairs.

[Marie in Kourou]

Mamelons should not be chilled. They should be left at room temperature to ripen and then gently rubbed with a circular motion using the thumb and forefinger. This will cause them to turn slightly pink, at which point one can commence eating them.

[Marie in Kourou]

See? *demonstrates correct mamelon usage with Wolfie*

[sharon share-alike]

Man, this thread always gets all racy and fun when I leave. I'm having major *snorkage* here. I mean, I WAS going to make a comment about being "tongue-tied" and having "tip of the tongue" syndrome, but it's too late now and you've moved on to more organic pastures!

Sheesh.

[Marie in Kourou]

Sharon, do not stop at mere snorkage. Join us on the elevator going down to Beelzebub's lair.

[KDF]

Sharon, it is never too late. Go there.

[wolfie]

*waits for SSA to go there*

[Marie in Kourou]

Yes, wow us with Shakespearean perv.

[Marie in Kourou]

*lets go of the mamelons* I'm spraining my fingers. Massaging sure can be hard work.

[sharon share-alike]

Oh, believe me...Shakespeare was a perv. Once you know that in the Renaissance "Hell" was a euphemism for female genitalia and "death" a euphemism for male orgasm, all those lines about "dying" and "decending into hell" take on a COMPLETELY different meaning!

[Marie in Kourou]

*mind boggles*

WHOOOOOHOOOOOO, Sharon!

[Meanie the Blue]

We're dying to hear more, Sharon. Give 'em hell.

[sharon share-alike]

Oh yeah...I was waiting for that. Such a cutting remark, Blue, no wonder you're the resident pun staff writer! :)

*leaves to let them figure out those euphemisms on their own*

Later SIKoes! (boy, that was just perfect, wasn't it?)

[KDF]

Blue's not here anymore, Sharon. He's dead. Never came back from the 3rd circle.

[Meanie the Blue]

Anyone know a good cure for performance anxiety?

[Marie in Kourou]

If Blue is dead at the Third Circle, then I'm doubly dead. Or I should be, as I got to the Sixth and lived to tell the tale.

Hell is a lovely place if you don't mind the whole dying thing.