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March 30, 2006

DEMOCRACY IN ACTION

"I vote we scuttle around the floor and eat stuff and creep people out."
"Me too!"
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"Me too!"

Comments

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Old news, just visit a consultant meeting at my firm.

oh and my first first

I vote no

My insurance doesn't cover scuttling. Slinking would be A-OK.

I would like to offer for export the "democracy" currently living under my sink.

*Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!* *Whap!*

*vision of cows scuttling across and pooping on his kitchen counter*

Dave, are you dating Barbie?

"Jose Halloy and the Cooperating Cockroaches" wbagnfarb

Thats just soooo cute to see them all working together like that and getting along and whatnot. Maybe we should learn a lesson from them.
I mean really - we send 535 insects to Washington and they all wind up in the same house. Too bad they can't even agree on where to get food at a reasonable price.

I don't want to know that cockroaches are as intelligent as the people who run my office.

Hey, they gotta prepare for the "nucular" explosion that will leave them in charge of the world.

Best Dave Post Of The Day - So Far.

WTG, Dave!

Pardon me. Before I comment, I need to head into the walls for a little "antenna probing, touching and more" (especially and more) with some of my co-bloglits.

Don't wait up.

Dave, I don't know what it is about this post, but it is the funniest thing I've read in a long time! Your entry, that is... not the article.

If The Wench is reading, expect me to run around the house saying "Me too!" a lot tonight. And probably for weeks to come. You can thank Dave.

Now we need to genetically engineer a cross between cockroaches and lemmings. Then they can ALL self destruct in a communal, democratic fashion. Why is there no research on that?

growing up in FL., I always thought the Palmetto bugs settled things by arm-wrestling...

I lost and now they get one-third of my salary.

Congrats, Kat!

and humongous *SNORK* @ MOTW's shoe!

I HATE ROACHES.

these people are eligible for an IGnoble prize.

I HATE ROACHES.
Posted by: southerngirl | 03:23 PM on March 30, 2006

That's just because you've never been served them properly prepared.

*flips on light*

~scatter~scatter~scatter~scatter~scatter~scatter

*throws up on Lab*

(*snork*)

Blau~ Your quote for the thread:

"*crunch* Uh-oh. I'm sorry. Was that your auntie? Huh. That must mean that's your uncle over there then, huh? *crunch* You know ya'll look alike."

We have already cross engineered roaches and lemmings and you can see them on any day you visit the Congress! Of course, you should be careful and avoid possible hate-speech prosecution and kindly refer to your representative as the honorable Palmetto Roach from Florida.

Blau~ Your other quote for the thread:

"No thanks. I had bugs for lunch."

Ooops, it's Palmetto Bug! Palmetto Bug...now I am in trouble. I wonder if the Netherlands will grany political asylum?

No, no - isn't it there, you'd want to be arrested?

Let's see, they:
-communicate
-cooperate
-clean up the kitchen
-don't leave the seat up on the toilet
-don't hog the remote
-eat very little
-don't complain about my cooking
-are very quiet
.....hmmmm

*RAID™ SNORK* @ Dave and MOTW's shoe, which needs to be thrown in the biohazard bucket

I agree with Lab. The set up for this article is hilarious! Way to go, Dave!

Eerily similar to the way democracy is practiced by this group...

http://www.nea.org/annualmeeting/index.html

Be afraid, be very, very afraid....

"From American Demographics, Nov. 1991

Psychographic marketing techniques helped Raid roach spray marketers discover that the reason low-income Southern women were the heaviest users of roach spray was that "a lot of their feelings about the roach were very similar to the feelings that they had about the men in their lives," said the advertising executive on the account. They said the roach, like the man in their life, "only comes around when he wants food." The act of spraying roaches and seeing them die was satisfying to this frustrated, powerless group."

A man was sitting at home one evening, when the doorbell rang. When he answered the door, a 6 foot tall cockroach was standing there. The cockroach immediately punched him between the eyes and scampered off.

The next evening, the man was sitting at home when the doorbell rang again. When he answered the door, the cockroach was there again. This time, it punched him, kicked him and karate chopped him before running away.

The third evening, the man was sitting at home when the doorbell rang. When he answered the door, the cockroach was there yet again. It leapt at him and stabbed him several times before running off. The gravely injured man managed to crawl to the telephone and summoned an ambulance. He was rushed to intensive care, where they saved his life. The next morning, the doctor was doing his rounds. He asked the man what happened, so the man explained about the 6 foot cockroach's attacks, culminating in the near fatal stabbing.

The doctor thought for a moment and said,

"Yes, there's a nasty bug going around.

That's quite a knee slapper there.

Okay, so the little bastards can do long division. How far out can they numerate PI.

They both communicate *and* cooperate?

Final Score:
Roaches: 2
My manager: 0

artist formerly yadda....maybe that's why Raid's an ingredient in so many southern dishes....and I gotta give you at least a *snorklette* for gutting out a Kafka-esque joke.

I HATE ROACHES.

Posted by: southerngirl | 03:23 PM on March 30, 2006

oh c'mon - sure it burns yer lips a little when ya light 'em, and they tend to be a little on the dry side, but that's no reason to waste perfectly good...

what?

oh, we're talkin' about bugs? never mind

Multiple*SNORKS* of great gratitude!!! You kept me from commiting suicide by stapler and made me laugh instead.

(I just spent two hours documenting my Flex Spending reimbursement stuff, and because I am xerox-challenged, I succeeded a few moments ago in faxing a year's supply of Valium receipts to 15 people here in the hospital.)

Well, it's all in the Roach-ian spirit of calm consultative cooperation...sigh. Let's scuttle out for some brewski, 'k? 'k? k? 'k? 'k? 'k? 'k? 'k?
(Did I leave anyone out???)

Please bear in mind that these roaches (Blattella germanica) are GERMAN, and are therefor very orderly by nature. Halloy originally had two other 'control' groups consisting of Blattella polandica and Blattella czechoslovakia. Unfortunately, the B. germanica roaches invaded the cages they were in and wiped them out before Dr. Halloy could get his data.

P.S. On an unrelated note, I believe we deserve an explanation for this:
http://www.sugarbushsquirrel.com/image/9001350.jpg
I was aware that the new Pope was more conservative than John Paul II, but this was the first time I heard that he was a squirrel.

I think the comparisons to Congress are wrong. Roaches bear a much greater similarity to Atlnata traffic, except fot the cooperation part.

"Ich bin ein behind der fridge!"

"I am a behind the fridge?"

...and this too, is STILL only $10.00...

Da! Er, I mean, duh!

But the real question:

Did Dave type all those "Me too!"s , or did he use the copy & paste feature?

OK, who said that?

Snork @ Annie WBH for "Ich bin ein behind der fridge!"

"Antenna probing, touching, and more" Just think! Some humans are willing to PAY for that!

Interestin' quotes: Cockroaches use chemical and tactile communication with each other ... They can also use vision ...

I know some critters higher up the food chain that also do this ... merely sayin' ...

and ...

When they encounter each other they recognize if they belong to the same colony thanks to their antennas that are 'nooses,' that is, sophisticated
olfactory organs that are very sensitive.

Cockroaches got lassos!

Me too!

I'm saddened this blog didn't make the short list for the Blooker Prize

ow! ow! ow! ow! ow! ow! ow! ow! ow! ow! ow! ow! damn! ow! ow! ow! ow! ow! crap! ow! ow! ow! ow!

Wait - is Dave already covering the national conventions again? Are any Senators fondling goats for all he knows yet?

"I vote we become ACLU lawyers!"
"Me too!"
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"But I want to be a member of Congress..."
"Me too!"
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"Me too!"

AS ANY CRAZED SEX EXPERT WOULD SAY:
ME TOO.
ME TOO.
ME TOO.
ETC.

To be honest, I like cockroaches better that any politician....but then again, I also like smearing my eyebrows with White-out (tm thingy).

... um ... Graz ... Wite Out® now has several formulae ... do you prefer the Super Smooth, Quick Dry or Extra Coverage?

Oh and by the way, we're real doofuses who spam blogs, completely oblivious to the fact that nobody here really f&*king cares.

I see the UNcooperative cockroaches are here....*goes to get Raid for Sp@mmers*

In the words of the imminently quotable W.C. Fields:

"That's carrying democracy a little too far!"

But, still on thread, my last wife was such a terrible cook that when I accidently left some dental floss in the kitchen, I discovered they had all hung themselves.

O.theU., I prefer the Super Smooth for those nights out where I get all gussied up, Quick Dry for the morning before work, and the Extra Coverage for those days I'm not feeling quite as fresh.

Graz - tnx 4 clearing (or covering) that up ...

Stupe' -- FUN KNEE! (Since they communicate by touching, I'm gonna guess they used an overantennae ['cuz they don't have hands] knot ... merely sayin' ...]

Did anybody else notice that Dave had EXACTLY 24 "Me too's" in his post?

*gets out Raid and shoots all 24 cockroaches in the thigh(s)*

*snorks* for Stupe and Graz!

and again, for MOTW's shoe.

One thing I don't get, why would they sell roach traps in Florida that only work for small roaches? I bought some roach traps at Wal-Mart and when I took them out of the box found they were smaller than the roaches that run through my kitchen. Maybe a baby roach could get inside one of these traps. There should be some kind of standard in Florida for the minimum size of roach traps.

Mebbe they should have a Whopper Club for roach hunters, much as they have for fisherpersons ... no "Catch and Release" program tho ...

Oooops! It would appear that The Sarcasticynic cannot count.

Well, MOTW's Shoe had forty Whaps ... so I'm not so sure I'd like to be very close around MOTW when the shoe hits the carapace ...

Forty Whaps ... same as the number of Whacks that Lizzie Borden gave her mother with an axe ... Coincidence? I think not. MOTW is perty deadly with them weapons disguised as footwear ...

SNork @ slyeyes

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