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February 22, 2006

IT'S AN ENVIRONMENTAL DISASTER AND A GOOD NAME FOR A ROCK BAND!

Keep an eye out for: Leaping Carp.

(Thanks to Claire Martin)

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BUT the real question is, can they repel mosquitos?

HA! FIRST!

Just how will they "...spoil drinking water for 40 million people"? Is carp crap toxic? Who drinks straight water anyway?

"I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it." WC Fields


well, get some whitefish and pike, and we can have gefilte fish that jumps into your plate! yum.

One scientist: Why do the jump
Second scientist: Beats the carp out of me.

WOW! First AND second!

Third?

WOW Leaping Carp escaped lagoons in Arkansas in the 90s and landed in the Great Lakes?!?! THATS one HELL of a leap!!

Can't remember if this was blogged here before, but it's one scary carp story/video.

Dang, not third, but two simulposts in a row! This has to be some kind of record. What kind of record, you may ask? A particularly MEANINGLESS record, I may reply.

Tomorrow's news: "A man has been arrested for stealing a large number of leaping carp and stuffing them down his pants. Police chased him for 8 hours as he bounced from pillar to post. He was finally apprehended when he accidentally lept into a large pot of lobster/prawn/squid/weiner gumbo."

"Let's do the Time Carp agaaaaain."

Mad: "A man has been arrested for stealing a large number of leaping carp and stuffing them down his pants."

Does this mean that now he is jumping into boats?

I'm wondering why there is an ad for Employee Retention Boot Camp on the same page as the Leaping Carp article.
"You WILL make the milestone by COB Friday or we will fill your sorry little cubicle with Leaping Carp. Do you hear me, Recruit?!"
"Sir, yes, Sir!"

I really like the conversion to metric that they gave:

few miles (kms)

goMet:

If I remember right, the exact conversion is: "a few miles" = "a coupla kilometers".

ps: Catapulting Koi W(also)BAGNFARB.

The leaping fish are silver carp that jump haphazardly when alarmed by passing boats and have injured boaters, some of whom have taken up garbage can lids as shields.

wimps - hiding behind garbage can lids

what they should do is turn this into a new sport - carp hunting - this would involve cruising the lake, shotguns ready to blast any 100 lb. fish that dares hurl itself into the boat - the rules would require that the fish be blasted while still in the air tho - wouldn't be very sporting to shoot 'em in the bottom of the boat

TCK, your new sport is a great idea! The official spokesperson would be Dick Cheney, of course.

BATS! We need bats to deal with this menace to boating - and to make it the next Olympic sport.

*snork* at TCK and Mad!

oh, yeah, and an extra *snork* to Mad for

Who drinks straight water anyway?

HA!

*snork* @ so.girl for snorking so much & *snork* @ myself, 'cuz no one else does

"& *snork* @ myself, 'cuz no one else does"

*snork* @ MOTW for being a snorkster!

"Who drinks straight water anyway?"

Southerngirl - I only got this when you reposted it. First reading, I thought he meant bottled water .

Wow--the implications of this invasion on future generations really scares the carp out of me!

Wow, the snork are really running all of a sudden.

*snork*
I am not addicted. I can stop snorking any time I feel like it. I just don't feel like it right now.

I would like to make two (not too) statements:

1) I am very proud to state that the founder of The DaVinci Institute, Tom Frey, is a friend of mine.

2) Tom, please quit scaring most of the rest of my friends.

That is all.

Wow! A snorking jackpot! ("Snorking Jackpot" WWBAGNFARB) A first and second, back-to-back simulposts and multiple snorks, all in the same thread!! I must be living right! Well maybe not, "right" could be a stretch, even given these particular bonuses, but I've had worse...

Anyway, I think we need to organize an "intervention" for MOTW's addiction... I'm sure Dave will allow us all to use his house for such a good cause. Who's (not whose) in?

Ok, Mad,you can count me in. There will be beer, right?

If one looks closely at a leaping carp’s mouth, one finds a striking resemblance to Barry Manilows lips. And you have to ask why it would ruin the water for 40 million?

Once again, I plead with all of you - please SNORK responsibly. The active ingredient, snorkotine, is highly addictive and is known to promote head lice.

s'girl, of COURSE there (not they're, not their) will be beer!! That's why we're having it at Dave's house!

Hey! *snork* I'm not one of those underaged snorkers. *snork* I have one of the original one-way tickets on the geezer bus. *snork*

Great - now I have the snorkups.
* holds breath and counts to 30 *

*paases out free samples of Snork-Away™, which I have just this moment made up.*

I look in my boat and I notice there's squirming
The silver carp gently leap
The food web's in shreds, the fish docs are affirming
While silver carp gently leap

I don't know how
You got out of Dixie
Those fish are tricksy, I hear
I don't know how
They get so excited
They're not invited near

I look at the lake and I notice it's vacant
Those silver carp gently leap
They spread through your pipes and your toilets adjacent
Still silver carp gently leap!

In an odd twist of fate Fabio was hit in the face with one of these while on a boat trip of the coast of Mackinac Island.

As a Pistons fan, I sincerely hope the Miami Heat doesn't find out about this!

("He shoots...he splashes...he scores!")

Next up in the Animalympics...

The Snork-O-Derm™ patch is also known to reduce SNORK dependency in a majority of cases, but is of course useless against second-hand SNORK.

And be advised that the marketing arms of Big SNORK are targeting our youth.

MOTW - the only cure is to say "krons" over and over. It works best whilst holding a wombat.

MOTW - you can always try a home remedy of honey and snorklic. Be sure to drink it backwards.

Oh...and *snork* @ insom

Flying carp? Some things would be funnier if I were slightly dyslexic.

daisymae - drinking backwards = self-administered enema, which is managed healthcare at its finest.

*Responsible SNORK!* @ MOTW

Lisa BFF - I just got your reference to the roller coaster incident. Since this is a water-related thread, I'll say *Snorkle!*

"fish killed the tv star"?

Annie LOL!!

Mr. C ... p'haps I should announce my most recent invention ... Snorko™ ... it relieves the embarrassing occurence of snorking by specific chemical actions that break down the snork-inducing compounds before snorking happens ...

Never worry again about snorking in public, or at solemn gatherings such as church, weddings or funerals ... take Snorko™ today!

BTW, I'll make a sacrifice here, and offer to be the designated snorker for anybuddy/group that would prefer to have some responsible person to handle potentially hazardous tasks such as driving, eating, drinking, dating, making love, raising kids ... what have you ...

I'd be proud to be the Designated Snorker for this blog and its bloglits ... it's the least I can do for people who've done so much for me ...

Annie - you mentioned a wombat ( It works best whilst holding a wombat). Is this a subtle hint that your blogger from Cincy is winning through?

*snorks irresponsibly* *Jack made me do it*
Iowa Carp! Not just for breakfast anymore! *calls Gov. Vilsack with new slogan encouraging people to visit Iowa even though they're not writers and it's not gefilte fish season*

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