ATTENTION SPORTS FANS

If somebody told you that you had a chance to play in a major international petanque tournament, I'm sure your immediate reaction would be: "A what?"

That was certainly my reaction the first time I was invited to a petanque tournament. It was on Miami Beach back in 2003, and I wound up writing a column about it, as well as making a new friend, Philippe Boets, a mildly deranged Belgian man who wants petanque to become a huge sport in America. This is never, ever going to happen, but it sure is fun to watch Philippe try. It's also fun to attend a petanque tournament, in which it is not always easy to tell who is playing, and who is spectating, and who is just lying on the ground. The sport, which was invented by the French, involves tossing little balls around, in between a lot of eating and drinking

I bring this up because Philippe is bringing the Open International Petanmque Tournament back to Miami Beach this weekend. Naturally, since this is an international tournament, participation is strictly limited to pretty much anybody who shows up and pays the registraton fee. I myself plan to have a team there on Sunday. We're training hard; several key players have already had indigestion. So if you're looking for something different and fun to do in South Florida this weekend, why not go bowling?

No, seriously, come on out to the Open.You might catch Petanque Fever! Then you will need shots.

Comments

[ahhm Clem]

I'll play the fee for a fee

[scat]

Petanque: It's the new curling.

[slyeyes]

Terrell Owens is available.

[Goog L]

Did you see the pétanque postcards on the "History" page?!

Naked pétanque! Wooooo-hoo!

(Or, as Billy Joel might sing, "It's Still Bocce Ball to Me.")

[Federal Duck]

Bah. Those hip young Petanque players with their fancy gear and loose women.
Every time the guys and I get deep into a Tiddlywinks competition, here come the Petanque brats roaring up in their hot cars, shouting things like, "Tiddly this old timers!" and "Petanquers get all the good drugs!" and "I think I just pooed myself!"
Quite frankly, it's just disgusting, and I vote we try to have some law passed about it.

Tiddly Power!!

[Aunt Nancy]

Hmmmm...petanque players...government officials in Louisiana building lawn mower race courses...hmmm...Louisiana government officials as petanque targets...hmmmm........

[King Wingbipeekaboo Etc.]

Count King Wingbipeekaboo in! He will be there right after he teaches his cow Big Old Rufus how to speak Korean.

[Tamara Rhymes With Camera]

Posting Attempt #2:

We played a few games of pétanque in our high school French Class. Skee ball is probably good practice for participation in this...sport.

On the Pétanque Blog: "We are honored that America's funniest columnist, Dave Barry will join us at some time during the tournament in South Beach." What? Dave? You're not camping out there?

[Brainy Jello]

It's kinda like horse shoes, but with...balls.
That's right: Horse balls.

[Mike]

Can't get along to the tournament myself (NZ!) but I'd whole heartedly everyone that does - have a bloody awesome time!

[Tamara Rhymes With Camera]

*snork* @ BJ

Dave, I actually considered coming down to South Beach this weekend (for the alcohol and tanned men) (and to look for Judi), but it has been reported to me that the cheap hotels in the area are filled with bugs.

I can handle rough towels and/or cold showers and/or rude service and/or lack of electricity...but not bugs. Sorry. I guess it's Freedom Pong for me this weekend. :(

[sct72]

Speaking of tossing little balls: Click.

[Jillywilly]

I would love to come, and I already need shots! (make mine Jagermeister, por favor)

But, unfortunately, there's that pesky Iowa/Florida distancy thingy. *&^%#$.

[Jillywilly]

um... distance thingy.

*slaps head -- dork! Dork! Dork!*

[lizagain]

why isn't anyone deleting this garbage? It's clogging the blogging!