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September 26, 2005

ATTENTION, DIVERS

EMERGENCY. EVERYBODY TO GET FROM STREET SEA.

(Thanks to Jim Maiwurm)

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Doesn't history teach us anything?

And Gentle Ben has been trained to use a scud missle..

First bats, now dolphins? I dunno - may have to get out the saltshaker for this one . . .

Killer dolphins. Now I've heard everything.

Oh, wait.....

I hate it when dolphins stick it to ya...but not when these dolphins do it to someone else...

This is what happens when the third-most intelligent species on the planet trains the second-most intelligent species on the planet to do their dirty work for them.

If any of them jump backwards through a hoop while whistling the Star-Spangled Banner, I think we can consider ourselves warned.

This is what happens when the third-most intelligent species on the planet trains the second-most intelligent species on the planet to do their dirty work for them.

If any of them jump backwards through a hoop while whistling the "Star-Spangled Banner," I think we can consider ourselves warned.

Troi - so what is the first?

Bwa-ha-ha!

Can't blame this one on the terrorists, can we?

Gasp! But what if the squirrels have actually escaped from US training facilities? And the snakes? What if the dolphins, squirrels and snakes get together and coordinate an attack?

I'm heading out to buy some duct tape and plastic.

MzVette ~ That would be the mice.

1) If they're "toxic" darts, why do they only put the diver to sleep? Somebody define "toxic" for us, please.

2) Why would the dolphins be outfitted with the toxic darts if they've only been in training, and weren't out on a mission?

MzVette,
The first would be mice, or rather the hyperintelligent, pandimensional beings who appear to us as mice and commissioned the Earth in the first place.

I am such a geek.

i know someone has made this up. pul----eeeez

Quick! Assign Jack Bauer to find and neutralize the terrorists who are at this very minute planning on perverting these dolphins to their nefarious cause.

Wait! Has anyone seen these dolphins at Home Depot?

Hugh ~ This article proves that the dolphins will be leaving soon.

So Long and Thanks For All the Fish!

Judi - I don't know how many caught your reference, but it wasn't lost on all of us.

"but the dolphins were not returned until US navy scientists had examined them."

Debriefed, that is. The Navy had to find out if the trained dolphins had spilled any Navy beans to the trick dolphins.

*get it - Navy beans?*


This is not too shocking. For years we have been told about Dan Marino having a cannon for an arm.

"Finally! Free from my watery cage! First on the list: Lassie. I'm taking that publicity stealing bitch OUT!"

To the uninformed: the warning "Everybody to get from street" must be spoken in a thick Russian accent. My husband and I still say this to our kids, who have no idea why. Does anyone else recognize it?

yay, walt! ;)

speaking of animal rights crackpots...

what do those people do when a bug splatters on their windshield on their way to a protest?

i've always wanted to know that.

all i remember from that movie was the Russians trying to pronounce 'Gloucester'...

more for geezers...

They call him Flipper, Flipper
deadly and frightening
No one you'll see is more lethal than he
And we know Flipper, like 007
Will send you to Heaven, if orders there be!

How will Jack Bauer shoot them in the thigh?

LTT - they turn on their wipers and hit the fluid a few times if it doesn't come right off.

Glad I could help.

BTW - They do the same thing if a puppy splats on their windshield, only way more fluid.

The mice will see you now.

(One of the best sentences EVER .)


ahhh, since I have had pet mice, I do agree. Me, sitting at attention on my bed (I didn't want the mouse to realize I was in the room, haha, I'm so smart) waiting for my little mouse that I loveningly feed to reappear after the 200th time that she escaped from her cage. She would walk out into the middle of my room looking casual, at which time I would jump from my bed, in a sneaky manner (it can be done) and she would wait until I was a quarter of an inch from grabbing her than run off at lightening mouse speed. I would return to the bed (after sitting on the floor and trying to sweet talk her into my hands for 30 mins) and it would all start again. I'm sure there was an audience of wild mice somewhere paying her for such a show.

ok, this is probably a little late... but that link that spinner put is too funny. Even though I know the trivia fact shouldn't be funny... it just is in lu (sp?) of the rest of the page. Also, the whole "I remember this movie from my childhood.." comment.

This is a little ridiculous... the US Military doesn't let the majority of it's members carry around loaded weapons unless they are on a mission (or in Iraq or Afghanistan).

The odds that these dolphins would have either the dart guns, nor more improbably have the loaded dart guns, on them is very low.

I wonder if they chafe?

neatfreak - As Whittaker Walt points out, it's from the movie "The Russians Are Coming;" it stars Alan Arkin and Carl Reiner. It's a household favorite for us Jellos.

Way to go, Wurm!

Any Dilbert fan knows that dolphins can be dangerous (especially to lawyers)

can you really blame him

who is "spinner"?

Thanks all for explaining the blogline. I sure didn't get it!! Now, I can trust that it's funny.

judi - spinner8 was 1st poster...

I am "spinner," judi. It's short for spinner8.

Stop! Or my dolphin will shoot!

I think it's hilarious people are actually discussing whether the dolphins would have dart guns with them at the time of being washed out. Heh.

Long Tall Texan -- regards your bug-in-the-windshield animal rights remark ...

Did you know that Gary Larson (the cartoonist who created the brilliant "Far Side" comic strip) once applied for a job at the Humane Society ... and on his way to the interview, he hit a dog?

(Amazingly enough, the dog survived and walked away, which is something -- we must admit -- straight out of "Far Side" anyway.)

So that's why those dolphins I photographed while snorkeling @ Kona looked as if they were laughing at me ...

"Ha-Ha ... we know something you don't ... and BTW, don't mess with us!"


Wow, I get posted and I'm away from the computer all day! Doh! (But thanks, Judi)

If anyone doubts the guardian article, check out the Navy official site (they have sea lions, too!)
U.S. Navy Marine Mammal Program FAQ

When guns are outlawed, only dolphins will have guns.

Oh, just to help out MzVette, because I still don't think she gets the reference, check out "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" and all will be clear. (The movie is out on DVD, but the book is better.)

What a load of crap!

Doesn't Mark Townsend Houston proof read his stuff for "sensibility"?

Who'd keep loaded dolphins while a hurrican bore down on them? Personally I'd unload my armadillas!

(squeaky vocalizing FX here)

You can have my dart gun when you pry it from my cold, dead flipper!

I will have to do so AlanBoss, I have wanted to see the movie, and of course the book is always better (I have only seen one exception so far... and not cause the book was bad, just cause it was so confusing, haha).

"Dolphins. Why did it have to be dolphins?"

Really, is anyone surprised?

"We are Nor-WEE-guns..."

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