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August 23, 2005


My family and I finally made it home. Our luggage, however, did not. I've been on the phone, and I now have reason to believe that our luggage is in the possession of either Delta or American, and it is currently located in either Salt Lake City, Dallas, or Atlanta. Or Miami International Airport and Drug Smuggling Center. Or possibly our luggage never left Hailey, Idaho. At this point I don't care where it is, as long as it does not get anywhere near this guy's luggage.


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But they weren't in his pants, right?

And somebody, somewhere, at this very moment, is pointing and giggling at your dirty laundry.

And stealing your toothbrush.

Maybe your luggage went to the Cottonwood buggy whip festival.

Dave, airline personnel always lose your luggage when you're returning from Idaho, so that when you call to ask, they can respond: "Idaho, Alaska"

This is in clear violation of the airline employee field manual Reagan instituted in 1985, which forbade the telling of the joke "If Mississippi borrows Missouri's New Jersey, what will Delaware?"

They argue that re-using the punchline is perfectly legal and good for the environment, but they are clearly off their collective rocker.

that's why you should just stuff everything inyour pants pockets.

C'bol's next joke will be: Iowa lot of money for the Minnesota I bought.

Christobol, they do, however, have a point.

Reduce, Reuse, recycle.

"Where's my luggage? Idaho, Alaska" is clearly shorter. Thus reduce.

You have documented reuse.

They recycled the original setup line to create the flight routings. "Going to Mississippi from Missouri requires a plane change in New Jersey and Delaware"

An environmental trifecta.


I know you meant well, and we all enjoyed your post.

But one of the rules of comedy is not to dissect a joke.

I apologize for assuming what C'bol will say next. I promise not to be so presumptuous in the future.

*goes to corner, puts on dunce cap*

I found your luggage. The shipped it to Alabama http://www.unclaimedbaggage.com/

Australia has some of the strictest wildlife protection laws in the world and is a signatory to international conventions which outlaw the trafficking of endangered and exotic species," Eutick said in the statement, adding that many of the animals did not survive the journey.

This sentence made my hard drive squeal.

Dave, just to be on the safe side, IF your luggage ever turns up, I'd suggest unpacking it in the back yard!

I thought with TSA, lost luggage was a thing of the past?

Well, they personally deliver mine all the time!

Dave, my theory is that they just couldn't give back your slinky faux leopard print dress and a cat's-eye costume ball mask.

You know, from the Barbie Collection.

Have you looked on Airforce One?

Dave, never try to fly out of Idaho, ever.

Unless you can afford the $21,000 private jet flight. I know I can't!!

Idaho, the state of no return, except by Outrigging Sherpa pack. Been there,Done that, never doing it again.

Flight to Bismarck, ND:: Boise, to Pocotello, to SLC, to Billings, to Denver THEN to Bismarck!!

Our route, you never run into the President. But, You might get a few Cheneys.(an unrelated Cheney clan lives centers in Rexburg, ID)

"Snakes. Why did it have to be snakes?"

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