TEST TO DETERMINE IF YOU ARE, AT HEART, AN ADOLESCENT MALE
See if one sentence in this story makes you eject coffee through your nostrils.
Update: Whoops. Bad link. It has been fixed, I hope.
« Previous | Main | Next »
See if one sentence in this story makes you eject coffee through your nostrils.
Update: Whoops. Bad link. It has been fixed, I hope.
You can follow this conversation by subscribing to the comment feed for this post.
This is only a preview. Your comment has not yet been posted.
As a final step before posting your comment, enter the letters and numbers you see in the image below. This prevents automated programs from posting comments.
Having trouble reading this image? View an alternate.
Sorry Dave, can't see it.
Posted by: Baroncoop | May 24, 2005 at 05:25 AM
Uh, Dave?
We're sorry, but the page you requested could not be found.
http://weblog.herald.com/column/davebarry/archives/v
If you got here by typing a URL, please make sure the spelling, capitalization, and punctuation are correct, then try reloading the page.
Posted by: MOTW | May 24, 2005 at 05:28 AM
I think that Dave must be blogging through his cell phone again, or something, because this is the second problem to crop up this morning...
Posted by: Marvin | Paranoid Android | May 24, 2005 at 05:29 AM
Uh, Dave?
We're sorry, but the page you requested could not be found.
http://weblog.herald.com/column/davebarry/archives/v
If you got here by typing a URL, please make sure the spelling, capitalization, and punctuation are correct, then try reloading the page.
Posted by: MOTW | May 24, 2005 at 05:30 AM
um, the link worked, and is there really any reason to care about benecio deltoro and penelope cruz.... is this the line you were looking for: "It was pretty hairy but I only did what any other man would do. I was glad to be able to help out."
this message has been brought to you as a public service...
Posted by: queensbee | May 24, 2005 at 05:33 AM
Ok, there it is and there is a nice coffee stain on the wall from where I shot it out of my nose.
Posted by: Baroncoop | May 24, 2005 at 05:36 AM
Maybe it's cause I'm not an adolescent male....
Posted by: VictoriaE77 | May 24, 2005 at 05:38 AM
Ok, there it is and there is a nice coffee stain on the wall from where I shot it out of my nose.
Posted by: Baroncoop | May 24, 2005 at 05:38 AM
Victoria - me either. I had to read it twice thru to try to find the spewage inducing sentence.
Moving along ...
Posted by: MOTW | May 24, 2005 at 05:54 AM
guess i'm not ,dave, *sigh* but did you see the link where Mr. Del Toro is supposed to have had an uplifting experience in an elevator with Scarlet Johansson ?
Posted by: insomniac | May 24, 2005 at 06:04 AM
wow, and I don't even drink coffee
Posted by: adolescent male | May 24, 2005 at 06:04 AM
I don't get it. Can someone clue me in, please?
Posted by: JOE | May 24, 2005 at 06:06 AM
Penelope Cruz stuck in an elevator...do I care???
Posted by: snif | May 24, 2005 at 06:17 AM
No coffee spewing. But then, I'm not drinking any coffee. Still, even if I were, I don't think I'd be spewing it - from my nostrils or any where else for that matter. Mainly, I guess, because I'm not seeing any particularly humorous aspect to this article.
However, Mr. Deltoro is correct when he says he was doing what any other man would do. I'd help Miss Cruz out of an elevator any day.
Posted by: Schadeboy | May 24, 2005 at 06:36 AM
Schade, I'd help the mother out first, then climb back in and shut the trap door.
Hmm.... wait... I've never seen the mother....
Posted by: Balanchine | May 24, 2005 at 06:58 AM
to make up for my cluelessness earlier...
'Mister Benicio Del Toro' = 'bit more solid erection'
Posted by: insomniac | May 24, 2005 at 07:05 AM
"Encarna?"
That's special.
Posted by: Brainy Jello | May 24, 2005 at 07:17 AM
So he lifts her up, and "it was pretty hairy...".
Wonder what she was (or was not) wearing?
Posted by: DougDoots | May 24, 2005 at 07:26 AM
"It was pretty hairy but I only did what any other man would do."
Posted by: Adolescent Male, apparently. | May 24, 2005 at 07:49 AM
My Adolescent Male (AM) apparently just kicked in...I get it now.
Must be getting old if my AM is taking so long to get started. Maybe I need new batteries.
I think a new 2005 Mustang GTO convertable and my wife in a very revealing bikini sitting by my side should do the trick...
Posted by: Schadeboy | May 24, 2005 at 08:30 AM
Hey Benecio!
What'd you expect? Feathers?
Love,
Penelope and her mom.
Posted by: Penolope | May 24, 2005 at 08:38 AM
Schadeboy,
Real adolescent males would know it's a 2005 Mustang GT (no Oh!). You're thinking of the Pontiac GTO, which is nice, but not 1/2 the car.
Posted by: Brad | May 24, 2005 at 08:42 AM
Brad -
Not so, mon ami ...
I have it on good authority that the new electronic throttle linkage system on the Muskrat is sloppy and mushy ... the Goat, however has 400 romping horses and is even lighter than the '70 Judge I once owned, which had an identical 400 HP ...
... um ... why are you all looking at me as if I was an adolescent male ... ?
Posted by: U.O | May 24, 2005 at 09:20 AM
*zips in*
Why, Benicio, why???
Couldn't you have just left them there?
*zips out* hmmmph
Posted by: Eleanor | May 24, 2005 at 09:40 AM
Well put, Eleanor, very well put.
And I could think of one or two others I'd like to leave there with them. (nudge nudge wink wink know what I mean?)
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | May 24, 2005 at 11:46 AM
I have always thought Penelope Cruz had questionable personal hygiene, so the idea that she is hairy in . . . places . . . is not surprising to me. Also, it has often been said that she was a "beard" for the reputedly gay Tom Cruise, and that carries the "hairy" concept to whole 'nother level.
Posted by: Gretchen C. | May 24, 2005 at 02:57 PM
The last line says it all.
Posted by: Psycho Joe | May 24, 2005 at 03:44 PM
BTW queensbee, it was a PUBIC service.
Posted by: bbescuela | May 24, 2005 at 07:15 PM
Did anyone else notice the pic before reading the last line? That got me first. How many drugs did it take to make that face?
Posted by: Alex | May 24, 2005 at 07:36 PM