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May 17, 2005

ALSO, BEARS POOP IN THE WOODS

This bulletin just in: The French are not hugely popular.

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"I got a French-English dictionary for my French wife."

"That was a good trade!"

ribbit.

Not humorous? But they are. Just think of all the French jokes they have inspired!

(But not you, Marie!)

"I hear the Germans are going to create a new capital for their country now that they have been re-united with East Germany."

"Really? Where?"

"Paris."

(Er...I mean your fiance ((accent thingy))Marie!)

"I hear the Germans are going to create a new capital for their country now that they have been re-united with East Germany."

"Really? Where?"

"Paris."

I agree with all the horrible things said about the French. But that's who they are. They don't deny it. That's why I love them. The see nothing wrong with being self-centered, humorless, gourmand, sex fiends.

To quote Sandra Bullock in While You Were Sleeping: "Wow. Shocker."

nannied? tee-hee

mkj
thot they did that back during WW2

Jeff, my reaction was along the same lines: "Imagine my surprise."

"flesh-loving" and "self-obsessed"???? Are we talking about a nation of 13 year old boys?

"Do you know how to save a boat-load of drowning Englishmen?"


"No."


"Good."


--just bein' fair, is all--

In Heaven,
the cooks are French, the engineers are German, and the comedians are English.

In Hell,
the cooks are British, the engineers are French, and the comedians are German.

In Heaven,
the cooks are French, the engineers are German, and the comedians are English.

In Hell,
the cooks are British, the engineers are French, and the comedians are German.

The real question, of course, is who do the Continentals (i.e. not including Great Britain) dislike more - the French or the Americans?

I'm not sure I want to know....

mkj ...worth reading twice!

Bonjourrrrr... ya cheese-eatin', surrender-monkies.

The Italians describe the French as "just disgruntled Italians".

"Why are the French roads lined with trees on each side?"

"So the German army can march in the shade."

I heeard that one told by a French comedian named 'Coluche' (but he probably stole it from someone else). My experience has been that the French don't appreciate the 'French' jokes, mebbee I just tell them badly . . .

My experience has been the same, MKJ.

Also, I thought the Quebecois were even worse, in that not only do other countries dislike them, but even the French do!

By the way, two of the coolest guys I have worked with were French. Both funny, really into women but not icky about it, and both very smart.

Yew silly bottom-sneefing Americains! We haff more culchyoor een our unshaiven aermpeets than yew haff in yewr eentire countrais, yew uneducaited pig-dogs!

Also, yew smell of elderberries.

Le Revolutione!

Marie: Yeah, I miss Coluche. I saw him dressed as a woman in a parade in Paris in the early eighties (long story), right before the motorcycle accident that killed him.
(He did use some jokes I had already heard in English prior to his doing them, but he made them funnier anyway so I forgave him.)

As far as humor goes, the French are more into "l'esprit" (translates as 'wit'), or else flat-out burlesque farces. They do also like word-play (Raymond Devos is a good example), but it is different from the anglo-saxon stuff.
*Note to self: write a dissertation on this.*
*Reminder to self: you aren't a student any more.*
Oh. I forgot.

MKJ, when you say "word play" you mean like Scrabble, right? No wonder I don't get their humor, I'm not any good at that game.

The real question, of course, is who do the Continentals (i.e. not including Great Britain) dislike more - the French or the Americans?

Actually, GB hates Americans too. And my guess would be on more than the French. And hey, the US did it in far less time!

Oh, and the Québécois LOVE the French with irrational passion, even though France seems to think of them as something that got scraped off in the gutter to rot. Meanwhile, a very friendly person, who just happens to speak English, deserves a fate no less in their minds than being flayed alive so they can piss on their corpse...

Oh, and I HATE it when my burlesque farces are flat-out. Nothing will cure that but vinegar and Tilex. Wait a sec, I think someone mentioned olive oil the other day....


wanders away....

Actuall, I have a french friend (who isn't too crazy about the french, himself) who grew up loving the Pink Panther movies. When he came to America and saw them in the first time in english, he said it was like seeing them for the first time, as the french dubbed versions didn't include Clouseu's lousy french accent.

I meant, "Actually." [sigh]

And I bring it up to point oout that at least some french do have a sense of humor.

Arrrrghhhhh! I meant "out." I hate my new keyboard!

Alan: when you said "to point oout" I just figured you were Canadian or something . . .

According to Mr Clodong, "We are admired for our trains, the Airbus and Michelin tyres. But the buck stops there."

Did he mean "the franc", or was that a slam against the ol' U.S. of A?

I'd say that sums it up. I once had a French pen-pal in High School (by accident; wanted a German one, but they gave my address to a French girl) and she refused to write to me anymore when she found out my parents voted for Bush. No great loss there.

Because of the french opposition to the war in Iraq, american tourist visits have dropped off significantly. As a result, the french have been forced to be rude to each other.

fartez vous?

*oui*

"... As a result, the french have been forced to be rude to each other."

How could they tell?

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