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March 17, 2005

PLEASE MAKE A NOTE OF IT

(Thanks to Ted Habte-Gabr)

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When I was in school, back in the days of coal-powered underpants, it was more common when out on the playing field for the bad boys to simply jerk your gym shorts down to your ankles. The wedgie phenomenon was clearly still on the horizon. Also, there were no irritable bowels, there were upset stomachs.

it's about time.....now how about flying wedgie?

I move that we nominate "Urinal Penny" to be added.

And add an additional definition of "Ramparts".

Q: In 'My Fair Lady' what did Henry Higgins suffer from?

A:Irritable vowel syndrome!

*runs up behind Ins O'Mniac*

WEDGIE!!!!

[You know you deserved it]

blurkerette's comment reminds me of an old "Ren & Stimpy" episode where he did a wrestling move called "Flying Butt Scissors."

(i swear to you that i am NOT 12 years old ... but i may have been then.)

Yesterday I read on a BLOG about a member of AL QAEDA who was wearing CARGO PANTS and thus received a WEDGIE, resulting in IRRITABLE BOWEL SYNDROME.

Serves 'em right.

* boy, that takes me back *

(rubs backside ruefully)

"Coal-Powered Underpants" WBAGNFARB.

I for one believe it's time to add 'johnson' to its rightful place (har!) in the dictionary, approximately somewhere between Johnsonese and Johnsongrass. It has been a penile colloquialism for decades and deserves recognition!
For the record, I for one would definitely recognize a johnson if I saw one.

"Flying Butt Scissors" also WBAGNFARB

Candy, I second your coinage suggestion. In fact there should be a LOT of such euphemisms in the "dictionary". Dictionary, hah!

I have in my files a list I picked up somewhere of, gosh, it must be a hundred or more synonyms for the female equivalent. Some of them are droll indeed. But I lack the male version.... anyone.... anyone.....?

How about some revamped sayings for "Urinal Penny," as in:

*See a urninal penny, pick it up, all the day you'll have ... pee on your hands.

or

*A urninal penny saved is a penny urned.

Rhea: I am in your debt.

*best Godfather accent*

Balanchine, one day, I will ask you for a favour...

Rhea, you got it. If one day your son is horribly mangled by hundreds of machine gun bullets - and mind you, I very much hope this won't happen - but in the extremely unlikely event that it does, count on me to make you a beautiful wedding cake.

Great! What do I get if he's put in cement shoes and drowned in the Hudson? (just weighing my options)

Wow. Okay, I'm embarrassed. I had the term "wedgie" mixed up with "wedge" all these years.

As I think back on all the times I've misused it, I cringe. How stupid I must have sounded!

But whats worse is what I did all those times someone asked me for a wedge of pie.

Rhea: we leave the body, we take the cannoli.

It's nice to know that "blog" is now a legitimate word. But does anyone know if it has been accepted as a noun, or a verb?

Does anyone know if "blurk" is up for addition to the next edition?

...sittin' here cryin'laughin' at The List... Thanks to Rhealist!!

balanchine -

As long as the "list" was all you "picked up" ... then it's prolly okay ...

altho, if you've got a list, perhaps an inner ear problem is causing you to lean to one side ...

Yeah, but did he add "ripped from today's headlines" to his list? That's a very annoying phrase to me & my johnson.

"...many of the new words are ripped from today's headlines."

Because it seems like you can't open a paper these days without seeing a headline about wedgies. At least not around here.

Classical singer Russell Watson postpones his forthcoming UK tour after undergoing brain surgery...

Borat creator Sacha Baron Cohen reportedly signs a $42.5m (£22m) film deal starring his character Bruno...

Singer George Michael lends the piano on which John Lennon wrote Imagine to an anti-war exhibition...

Veteran game show host Bob Barker is stepping down from hosting The Price is Right after 35 years...

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