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January 27, 2005

OHHHHHHHHHHHH, OKAY HEADLINE OF THE DAY

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hehehehehehe (indulges in juvenile moment)

oh... and first?

Priceless.

The guy's real name is Seamus?

So many jokes, so little time...

But here's one.

Was a Sears catalog turned to the underwear section involved?

Oh man!
First I couldn't eat my oatmeal this morning, and now I can't eat my hot dog!

Ewwwwwhhhhh gross!

I thought it was a BALLET move.

So his real name is Satchel?!

I don't which is worse.

(sorry for the double-post! I caught the type-o at the last second *blush*)
So his real name is Satchel?!

I don't know which is worse.

"Ms Farrow and conductor Andre Previn adopted Soon-Yi from Korea when she was 7, but divorced soon after she took up with Allen."

After who took up with Woody ... Mia or Soon-Yi???

Woody and Soon-Yi = Dowdy Soya Onion

Woody and Soon-Yi = Dowdy Soya Onion

Dowdy Soya Onion wbagnf an all female alternative rock band

Seamus Allen = Slam Eel Anus

*takes "Annie Hall" back out of her Blockbuster queue*

ugh

he got his brains from his father. mia is such a pillar of stability.

And the investor in all of us:

Woody + Soon Yi = Dow is no yoyo

*in court*

Prosecutor: For the last time, Mr. Allen, did you, or did you not have unlawful relations with your adopted daughter.

Woody: I didn't!

Prosecutor: Didn't you?

Woody: I thought you said that was the last time you were going to ask, that time before this time.

Prosecutor: How do you explain these pictures?

Woody: I was teaching her about survival techniques.

Prosecutor: What!?

Woody: I was teaching her how to make a shelter, if she found herself out in the wilds with only a bedsheet and a sick old man's penis.

Prosecutor: Permission to treat the witness as gross.

Judge: Granted.

brain poot: Pack your bags, Satchel!

Could Seamus be his own grandpa.

And just in case Mia is inclined to continue to feel all outraged and victimized, lets recall she took the married Andre Previn away from from his wife Dory (who then wrote a terrific song called "Beware of young Girls")

Isn't Satchel the name of that wrinkle-dog in "Get Fuzzy?"

A child prodigy who entered university at 13........

........and then drank himself back to a 7th grade level.

Christobol - Over the top! I can't take it!!!! Blaaahahahahahahah.... Blaaahahahaha!!! Too funny! *crying*

Seamus - First of all your parents/mother named you Seamus. Second, your father's name is Woody. Third, your father married your sister. If anyone tells you they had a weirder, more messed up childhood than you, you have permission to knock them off their goofers and make them watch "the Curse of The Jade Scorpion" until their eyes bleed. Seriously... the poor kid had to get out of the house at age 13 to keep from losing his grip on the weasel.

What's wrong with the name, "Seamus?" Sure, it looks weird, but it's actually pronounced, "shame-us." ... Oh.

Mike: Yes

I recall that the Pillar of Stability married Frank Sinatra at some point in the 60s...rumor was they split up because she couldn't stand old age creeping up on her...

Talk about a messed-up family...

Thank God at least Seamus/Satchel has got it straight!!

looks like se-men to me*seamus*

Pogo
"Sounds just like that old 'Country Music Cryin' in my Beer Drinking Song' from the 50's:
'I'm My ON Grandpa.'"

Correction:

OWN not ON. (please excuse the Freudian slip)

so, if Soon Yi has a child by Woody Allen, Seamus will be the child's uncle and his half-brother? as Jeff Foxworthy always said, you know you are a redneck if your family tree does not BRANCH.

Satchel, who now is called Seamus
For dubious reasons is famous
It seems that his 'padre'
Made his 'hermana', his 'madre'
(If we puke,then no one can blame us.)

His father who thought 'he knew best'
Was a fan of quasi-incest
When 'Mamma Mia' found out
It was left in no doubt
that Woody would be suppressed.

*!* Wild applause for insomniac *!*
Though all your ditties are amusing (not that there's anything wrong with that), that is TopTen material!

Thank you jamester for the Dory Previn reference
Beware of Young Girls of twenty and four
as well as the great
I was screaming in my car in a 20 mmph zone

Hi, El ...

I'm so confuesed by all that stuff ... I have hardly anything at all to say ... but that's never stopped me before ...

... um ...

Well, I was gonna comment on Woody's Woody, but someone beat me to that one ...

It makes the people you see on Jerry Springer seem almost normal.

And the award for most disfunctional family goes toooo.......

I dunno, for putting the 'fun' back in dysfunctional, Michael Jackson is right up there.
(SNARK!!) *wonders if his kids have psychological attachment to turkey baster*

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