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January 18, 2005

IS THAT A MULTIMEDIA PLAYER IN YOUR POCKET?

Or are you just happy to see me?

(Via Gizmodo)

Comments

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"Outstanding firm!"

It a, uh, multimedia player in my pocket.

Ya, just gotta love the name of the correspondent...Bang Seong-hun!
"Males are the primary target for most digital equipment,”
I was unaware that I could make my "equipment" Digital. Do I just plug into the nearest electrical outlet? What about polarity issues?

Holy Mahatma K. Jeeves, it is outstanding and firm.

And as I'm as sure as C-bol is a computer geek, all major advances in technology are driven males' pornography-related needs.

Nothing says "come talk to me" like portable porno....

I think I just downloaded :)

"What are you watching?"
*startled* "What? Oh uh...Steel Magnolias."
"Funny, I don't remember a bestiality scene."
"What? Those bastards at Blockbuster! Don't they even check to see that the right movie is in the case? That manager is going to get a piece of my mind, I'll tell you what! Sorry about this, even though, of course, it's not MY fault."
"No big deal. I think it's kinda funny."
"Oh, ok. Can you hand me my pants?"

ME FIRST !! :-)

Hey - that advertising works. I'll buy one of them...

What are they selling again?

The best part of that article is the name of the reporter...Bang Seong-hun, sungbang@chosun.com.....LOL

Actually, they can't get in trouble for using a porn star in their ads - it's like a classic grift (the victim won't report because they'll incriminate themselves).

"Can you believe these guys are using a PORN star in their ads?"
"What?"
"Look at this."
"She's a porn star?"
"Oh yeah. Big time."
"How do you know that, honey."
"I... er.. that is... I read about this... on a bl...er... on CNN."

Must say something about my life, but I have never heard of her.

Must say something about my life that I have heard of her.

Come out of the cave, pogo. It's all right....

Way to go, Rita!! WOOHOO!

Suddenly they drop in a direct quote from the movie "Kinsey":

"Males are the primary target for most digital equipment.”

Here in southern CA she does a TV commercial which I have seen at 8p.m. and 10a.m. (children may be present) for a bikini wax product that she says "can be fun for you and your partner to do together"!!!!!!!!!

*goes to lease ANOTHER life*

*reconsiders the "bad" side of male bikini waxing*

OK! I'll DO it!

Kibby... I'm not sure, but I don't think that's what they meant. I could be wrong.

Duct tape is an inexpensive substitute for bikini wax...

"Males are the primary target for most digital equipment,”

yeah. duh. we know. its all you guys ever think about.

*stares at pogo*

Not if you ever want to get laid again, it isn't.

If you click on the Gismodo link and scroll down you'll find two, count 'em, TWO HOT PIX of the young Bill Gates. Judi, comment, please?

Pogo,

Ouch!!!

I'm with elle on this one pogo. sticky, patchy pubes don't do it for ANYbody.

They called it a PMP, but shouldn't it be a PIMP?

I Want My PMP

I want my, I want my PMP
I want my, I want my PMP

Now look at them ta-ta's, that's the way you do it
You watch a porn star on that PMP
Moves ain't workin'? Here's the way you do it
Money means nothin' naked chicks you'll see
Your moves ain't workin', here's the way you do it
Lemme tell ya, it might hurt some
Maybe get a blister on your little finger
Maybe get a blister on your thumb

{Refrain}
We got your classic girl on girl lovin'
Here comes the UPS deliveries
Who knew that box was full of vibrators
Looks like the pool guy's easy to please

The little hottie with the earrings where they don't go
Yeah, buddy, she's on her knees
That little hottie got herself some work done
That little hottie she's a hundred and three!

{Refrain}

I shoulda learned to play in private
Watchin' at work, don't work for me
Look at that mama, she got it stickin' in the camera
D'you think the boss can see?
And can he hear, all those, suggestive noises
She's bouncin' on a sofa with a chimpanzee
Oh, moves ain't workin' here's the way you do it
Cuz your money means nothin' when nude chicks you'll see

{Refrain}

Your moves ain't workin' here's the way you do it
You watch the porn star on that PMP
Moves ain't workin' here's the way you do it
Money means nothin' with nude chicks to see

Money means nothin' nude chicks to see
I want my, I want my, I want my PMP

Must say something about my life, but I didn't know who Jenna Jameson was until my psycho, bi, ex-girlfriend told me who she was... I don't know what it says, but it says something...

Oh, Bikini Waxing With Duct Tape wbagnfarb. Or maybe not...

And we should all bare in mind that 'digital' has meanings unrelated to electronics...

Jenna thinks its cute that you blogged her Dave.

Never heard of Jenna Jameson either, but then again my main indirect contact with "pron" is a) this blog and b) descriptions by certain porn-watching friends.

Don't care for it myself.

Duct Taped Pubes WBAGNFARB.

BIKINI WAX! BIKINI WAX!

Now that I have your attention, has anybody else checked out the hot Bill Gates pix on the Gizmodo link? Seriously, they're suitable for framing and hanging in your cube.

I didn't expect such an overwhelming response to my duct tape suggestion.

Actually it was derived from another forum on which uses for duct tape were being listed one day. One lady - a Colorado farm wife - said, "I use duct tape to remove unwanted hair from my husband's back!"

I have never actually participated in female depiliation rituals, outside telling my wife that she was not allowed to have a better mustache than mine.

*for all those considering the benefits of waxing with duct tape - please read below*

I was on a ski trip, back country in the interior of the Rockies for 10 days, with a friend of mine. When we returned to civilization (aka a nearby public hot spring) the first thing he noticed is that there were several *very* cute ladies about our age who were going to be going into the springs about the same time. He (a thriving metrosexual*)seemed quite concerned that he had not been able to shave his chest for over a week and seemed convinced when I told him "Oh, you know what? Just use some duct tape, it's the same as waxing - pulls hairs out etc etc. Do it quick like a band-aid"

So if you can picture walking into a change room at a public hot spring and seeing my friend lying back-down on a bench with only a towel on while I tear pieces of silver duct tape off his chest, you can probably also imagine the yelps of pain he was trying in vain to stifle. Moreover, try picturing this same man later in the day trying to explain to a few girls in the near-by hot tub that the red marks all over his chest were from having his ribs taped after he did some damage while backcountry.

The moral of the story is...duct tape waxing, while it may or may not be popular with the kids these days, is not cool. In fact the angry red marks on my friends’ chest for the next 2 days are only testament to the bravery of anyone who attempts this feat. (read: bravery = stupidity)

*def'n - a sexual person who rides The Metro...as I understand it.

Bravo, C'bol. You even worked chimpanzee from "Money for Nothing" into your version!

Eleanor, sorry, but I don't think "fun" and "bikin wax" belong in the same sentence.

And Rita, I do know (through reading only) who Jenna J. is, but sadly I've never seen her work.

Brad, you sadistic bastard. Well done!

Hadn't shaved his chest LATELY? Lately like during the current and last centuries?

Where I come from a guy with a shaved chest who had not undergone recent cardiovascular surgery would be viewed with extreme suspicion.

Too bad Jeff- She's a real Workaholic.

*ummph*

*stops running lady remington over his chest*
"You can come back later, ma'am. Damned Right, Pogo!"

----

Jeff - thanks. I could not, in good conscience, take a chimpanzee out of a porn song.

Jenna who?!

Oh, man, she's SO 2004.

Is it just me or are her ramparts all lopsided? One looks like it's higher on her chest than the other. Um, not that I was looking or anything. Oh, hi Mad!

"Which sex-kitten can we get to promote the PMP?"
"Pamela Anderson?"
"Too expensive...we're on a budget"
"Jenna Jameson is half price this week."
"Half price?"
"She broke one of her ramparts"
"Broke it?"
"She is a porn star you know..."
"Can you break them?"
"Here, watch the footage on the PMP"
"Good Lord! And the guy doesn't look like he fared to well either..."
"That's a girl"
"Can we prop it up with duct tape?"
"Might look a little lopsided"
"Go with it... We're on a budget... And let me know if Peter North breaks his penis... We're planning to test market a female version this spring"

Gecko, I saw the "Tiger Beat" pix of Bill Gates. The second one warmed my cockles, but don't tell my mom. I don't believe people who say Billy is microsoft.

Weasel - Look all you want. I'll even look with you if you so desire.

*pinches self*

*pinches weasel*

And Karlota will now tell us about her experience with those "male enhancement doohickies."

Karlota?

Here in southern CA she does a TV commercial which I have seen at 8p.m. and 10a.m. (children may be present) for a bikini wax product that she says "can be fun for you and your partner to do together"!!!!!!!!!
Posted by: Eleanor on January 18, 2005 03:17 PM
.
Duct tape is an inexpensive substitute for bikini wax...
Posted by: pogo on January 18, 2005 03:24 PM
.
*stares at pogo*
Not if you ever want to get laid again, it isn't.
Posted by: elle on January 18, 2005 03:28 PM

[Wonders if this means what it appears to mean]

a bikini wax product that she says "can be fun for you and your partner to do together"!!!!!!!!!

I! DON'T! THINK! SO!

....now shaving.....

*cough*

I'm sorry, but the "funhaler" looks like kiddie bong to me.

El - What Channel ...?!?!?!

Not if you ever want to get laid again, it isn't. FOOCL!

old limerick, sorta related, somehow, to this thread:

Said a certain lynx-eyed detective
Could it be my eyesight's defective?
Has your east tit
the best of your west tit?
Or merely my faulty perspective.

This post is probably going to be removed for profanity reasons.

iPud.

I shall take my gutter-mind and leave quietly now.

Sheesh!

I could mess up a one-car parade ... in fact, I have ...

Corrected limerick:

Said a certain lynx-eyed detective
Could it be my eyesight's defective?
Has your east tit the least bit
the best of your west tit?
Or merely my faulty perspective.

Anyone want to tutor me on how to do a link? A friend emailed me a gag photo, and I'd like to share it ...
... or I could just post the address ???

UO--

A HREF="http..."

your text in between

/A

but, both commands must start with

And, yes, as far as I know, you do need the quotation marks around the address.

Jeff-- Nothing beyond the ads in my inbox. Sorry to disappoint you.

Sly-- I just showed the pic to the significant other, and he said it looked like a bong, too.

Well, crap. Stupid thing hid half the message anyhow. Okay, UO, you gotta use those funky arrow thingers--shift-comma to start the command and shift-period to end it.

*giggle*
It's a good thing I sometimes pretend to proofread, because I missed an f in there, and it came out differently...

A friend sent me this, and I'm seeing if I've lernt how to post a link ... tnx Karlota ...

If this doesn't work, hit it on Google ...

CAUTION: It is "cute" -- at least I think so -- but someone will surely be offended by it ... let's just hope that the well-known sense of humor of bloglits will enjoy it ...

Did you forget to put text in between the two commands?

No ...

I did the little bracket thingies ... ooooh ... I gotta put something between the "lesser than" and "greater than" TO START IT, and then do it all over again TO STOP IT ...

Missed that part ...

BREAK! FOCL!!! Just got the joke ... where you left out the "f" ...

O-tay, Duckwheat ... what do I put to start the thing, between the little arrow-brackets ... ???

Ya, I try to keep healthy habits and have at least one of those shift-period things every so often ...

Try again

posting a link ... maybe ...

www.veronicas-urls.co.uk/badhairday.htm

If that doesn't work, here's what I'm trying to post as a link ...

www.veronicas-urls.co.uk/badhairday.htm

once more

www.veronicas-urls.co.uk/badhairday.htm

??? did that work?

'lota -

I'm going to bed ... getting late even out here on the left coast ... 5:00 a.m. comes right after 4:59, and it doesn't matter if its PST or whatever ... the day is just as long ...

If you figure out what I'm missing on those commands, leave me a note and I'll check it before work or after I get home tomorrow nite ...

gotta learn some time ... tnx4 the help

g'nite all

Ooh, a simulpost and everything.

Okay -

See a bad hair day kitty!

?

Karlota --

TNXTNXTNXTNXTNXTNX!!!!!!!!!

You have been so patient with me ... you must be tired ... go to sleep ... talk to you tomorrow, or whenever ...

Holy cow! You got it right, plus another simulpost. Are we good, or what? LOL.

Yeah!

Double Wowser!

tnx again

g'nite

Except ...

I've tried it three times, and it always kicks me out ...

A connection failure has occurred

So, I dunno if it's just my cheap-o server, or a fault somewhere else ...

will try tomorrow ... g'nite again, y'all

*shudder*

Bikini Waxing AGAIN ?!?!?!?

And has Jenna got a reduction lately? She doesnt appear as mammerous as she used to....

I have heard of Jenna Jameson, but for the life of me I can't figure out what other guys see in her...

Ok, my wife isn't reading over my shoulder any more... Hubba hubba!!!

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