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December 15, 2004

UNIVERSITY OF MIAMI CAMPUS LIFE UPDATE

You may recall that several days ago this blog was relieved to note that a large crocodile had been removed from a lake at the University of Miami. But now we find that it was apparently part of some kind of crocodile fraternity.

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Pesky Critters Reptile Wranglers is a hilarious title, eh?

Crikey!
(and first)

"The dominant males send other males packing," he said. "Who's going to chase the ladies off?"

I'm confused: since when is it the goal of a guy to chase a lady off?

"Hardwick [..] thought he was hallucinating . . ."
Woah, same thing just happened to me, dude!

several days ago this blog was relieved

Well, really! Everybody knows that relief is only temporary, and eventually you have to go again!

MOTW- I think they're saying that the reason the refugee crocs. are males are that no one is going to chase off the females. The article also answered a question I had left over from the earlier one. When I was at UM (shortly after Pangaea (not a rock band,but wbagnfarb) broke up), locals and children of students would fish in Lake Osceola for food. I think Donna and his pals have taken care of that.
Also it sounds like Donna and friends may be croconerds.

''I thought I spied a log floating down the lake's middle....

I spy with my little eye, a log....no, wait...it's an alligator....no, wait.....let me get a closer look at the snout.

oops

*gulp*

slyeyes - that made me think of the candybar in the pool scene from Caddyshack.

"Hardwick doesn't think the croc is a threat to humans because he tempted it with bread, which the croc ignored. That wouldn't have happened if people had been feeding it."

Does that mean only humans who taste like bread are at risk?

Maybe people have been feeding it something else besides bread.

Maybe the croc ignored the offered bread and ate the people.

Don't relax until these and other questions are answered.

I fail to see any humour in that, BetterThanNothing.

*Honey! Get the kids, it's time to leave Miami.*

Crocodile fraternity scavenger hunt list:
1. Football Jersey
2. Pair, woman's underwear
(extra points for these if owners are still attached)
3. pocket 'protectors'
4. above all, female crocodiles!

Let's a sing a song right now about a croc name of Donna
The wrangler can't quite catch her, although he seems to wanna
Thought he had her once, but it wasn't she
So she still floats around the pond, at the U of Miami...

She's a Junior now...

Majoring in Animal Husbandry...

Frat house of crocodiles = true "Animal House"?

Crikey!

The crocs have ''taken down'' most of the campus Muscovy duck population

Damn Crocs!!! Those ducks were my only friends when I was at UM. And if you have never seen a Muscovy duck well they are about the ugliest ducks in the world. I always thought they were mutated from the water in lake Osceola, but maybe it was from being chased by crocks. I spoke with a felow Alum last night and he has both Crocks on video tape from several weeks ago. Seems the professionals are slacking if they didn't know there were two beasts in the lake.

Mad, please don't be upset but I have to tell you that it's not just the crocs--I ate a Muscovy duck last week myself. A friend of mine ordered it from some gourmet food place and had it shipped up here at great expense. Cooked it up with a cherry sauce. I didn't really like it very much, I promise.

*at Quackmasters HQ*

Fed: This aggression will not stand, man!

Walter: They peed on your rug dude! They peed on your f#$&ing rug! Also, they ate your family and MadS called them ugly.

Fed: Et tu, Mad? Doth ye forsake me? Am I forsook? Has my for been sooken?

Muscovy: *preening* I don't know what you're talking about. I'm dead sexy.

Sandy: You're also dead tasty. Or tasty dead, depending....

Fed: Sandy, I have alerted the authorities. I have connections. They don't call me Federal Duck for nothing!

Mad: ....Yeah, they do.

Fed: Oh, right. I still feel fully forsooken. I'm going to UM right now and give that croc a piece of my....

Donna: Leg? Wing? Thigh?

Fed: *turns around slowly*

Fed: AIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!

I think I saw a recipe on the Food Network for Fed Duck a l'orange... yum!

Fed: LOL on The Dude (not Mr. Lebowski)

" ... as humanely as possible ..."

Mebbe they can get some help from those sheepshooters ... er, Sharpshooters ... in England?

I have been looking for sites like this for a long time. Thank you! prozac

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