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December 30, 2004

ART APPRECIATION 101

We appreciate it. Really.

(Thanks to Kellii Hendren, who points out the helpful advice in the photo caption: Click to Enlarge)

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*Looks longingly at tree outside*
If only...

on the Guelph day of Christmas my true love gave to me... a penis-encrusted pear tree...

...witches removing mens' penises and placing them in bird nests in trees, where they would then multiply and take on a life of their own...

I have found that penises taking on a life of their own is a widespread phenomenon.

*click, click, click*

Hey, mine ain't getting any bigger!?!?!

In fact I believe its shrinking.

So, what Branch of government is this pointing at?

Insomniac- Did they smother it in Ballsamic vinegar?

*pope*

Mr. F.-that's the root of the problem.

Was that the tree Joyce Kilmer was talking about?

I think that I shall never see,
a poem as pretty as a tree.....

Sly, penises can be many things but pretty is not one of them.

I love this blog.

Book 9 -Harry Potter and the Ghibellines of Doom
Harry, Hermione, and Ron travel back in time to 13th century Italy. Hermione meets some witches, loses all interest in Ron, and takes up arboriculture.

"It's a message from the Guelphs, telling people that if the Ghibellines are allowed power they will bring with them heresy, sexual perversion, civic strife and witchcraft."

Sounds like Karl Rove's campaign strategy...

break me off a piece of that!

Insom- This particular problem can be traced all the back to the Dark ages if one is brave enough to venture.

Ow, I've got clicker's cramp...to many clicks on the "enlarge" button.

Ok...an unsolicited comment...stay with me now.. This 'tree' has male genitalia all over, and a tree is the source of wood. And when the Greeks had lain siege to Troy for ten years, without results, they pretended to retreat. They left behind a huge wooden horse, in which a number of Greek heroes, among whom Odysseus, had hidden themselves. The spy Sinon convinced the Trojans, despite the warnings of Laocoon, to move the horse inside the city as a war trophy. In the following night, the Greeks left the wooden horse and attacked the unsuspecting and celebrating Trojans, and finally conquered Troy. So is it a natural connection between penis and trojan? And is there a modern day connection or conversion to the story?

Ok...an unsolicited comment...stay with me now.. This 'tree' has male genitalia all over, and a tree is the source of wood. And when the Greeks had lain siege to Troy for ten years, without results, they pretended to retreat. They left behind a huge wooden horse, in which a number of Greek heroes, among whom Odysseus, had hidden themselves. The spy Sinon convinced the Trojans, despite the warnings of Laocoon, to move the horse inside the city as a war trophy. In the following night, the Greeks left the wooden horse and attacked the unsuspecting and celebrating Trojans, and finally conquered Troy. So is it a natural connection between penis and trojan? And is there a modern day connection or conversion to the story?

If only clicking actually DID enlarge.


>>>>sigh

^ way

what are all those birds doing ? Are they woodpeckers?

sorry about double post ... too much 'clicking' me thinks...and my oh my... one might think of advertising this in place of Cialis and all the 'growth' pills.

Fort, no no no, you are doing it wrong, not "clicking"....take away the "c", that should do it.

klynn - you want to (c)lick a 1000 year old penis???

Here, have a popcicle instead!

insomniac writes:
Are they woodpeckers?

LOL

guess we know the origin of the phrase "woody"

Oh Penis Tree
Oh Penis Tree
How lovely are thy branches

klynn,
Can I buy you a drink?

What does that one dude with the stick think, that those are pinatas up there?

"witches removing mens' penises and placing them in bird nests in trees, where they would multiply and take on a life of their own"


That explains it. I'm constantly thinking with mine.

The Woodster

And to think I usually don't park under trees just because of the bird droppings!

And if you plant one (in the ground, you pervs), what do you think would emerge come springtime?

"So... how do you like your new tree house?"
"It's kinda dicky"

I also noticed the branches are really schLooong

It's fantesticle! What a canopee on this tree! Anyone who doesn't think so should be penilized.

Have we used up all the penile euphemisms yet?

*thinks about saying something about a penal colony*

Reminds me of that song from Peter, Paul, and Mary. Do you all remember....

Penis Tree
When I was just a lad of ten, my father said to me,
Come here and learn a lesson from the lovely penis tree.
Don’t put your faith in love, my boy, my father said to me,
I fear you’ll find that love is like the lovely penis tree.

Penis tree very pretty and the penis flower is sweet
But the fruit of the poor penis is not pleas'rable to eat.
Penis tree very pretty and the Penis flower is sweet
But the fruit of the poor penis is not pleas'rable to eat.

Beneath the penis tree one day, my love and I did a lie
A girl so sweet that when she smiled the sun rose in the sky.
We passed that summer lost in love beneath the penis tree
The music of her laughter hid my father’s words from me:
Penis tree very pretty and the penis flower is sweet
But the fruit of the poor penis is not ples'rable to eat.
Penis tree very pretty and the penis flower is sweet
But the fruit of the poor penis is not ples'rable to eat.

One day she left without a word. She took away the sun.
And in the dark she left behind, I knew what she had done.
She’d left me for another, it’s a common tale but true.
A sadder man but wiser now I sing these words to you:

Penis tree very pretty and the penis flower is sweet
But the fruit of the poor penis is not ples'rable to eat.
Penis tree very pretty and the penis flower is sweet
But the fruit of the poor penis is not ples'rable to eat.

LOL-C'bol. but along with Seinfeld, I prefer the Trini Lopez version to the PPM version
(actually, I most remember the 'Lemon Pledge' version)

Is that a hardwood tree?

"Damnit, Jim, I'm not a tree surgeon!"

I wonder if Lorena Bobbitt was just trying to grow her own penis tree?

And I'd like to point out that the caption has a typo.

It's supposed to read "Lick to enlarge"

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