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October 06, 2004

INTERNATIONAL TENSION

Over the B-word.

(Thanks to Dave Gaebler)

Comments

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What is booger in Tiawanese? And whats with the testicle comment?

I was wondering that, too. And second.

A low blow.

We all know that Singapore has "small country syndrome." (Known in the south as "bantie complex"). I predict China gives em a wedgie and takes their lunch money.

Thanks for keeping us up on news. I've cancelled my subscription to so-called newspapers now that I read the blog.

If Singapore is the size of a booger, then Taiwan can't be much bigger then a loogie.

In my opinion, China just needs to back off. They got too many people to worry about as it is.

*sincerely wondering*
How could anyone take offense at booger?

Further research shows that alternate translations for the booger comment are; "dried piece of mucus," and "small piece of snot."
Alternate translations of the balls comment are; "licking China's balls," or "fondling China's balls."

We report, you decide.

Nice to know Dave has readers in Taiwan.

Yeah, that's right. Dave's taken his Presidential banter international, and is already striking fear into the hearts of nose-pickers worldwide.
Screw icbm's and wmd's, we've got tactical assault boogers.

Mu-mmy! He called me a booger!

Taiwanese minister: "We appreciate the opinion of the representative from Singapore, but respectfully submit that we are not of the same opinion."

UN Translator: "Even a country the size of a booger brazenly criticized Taiwan and former president Lee Teng-hui in the United Nations."

*Dave quietly removes translator jacket and sneaks out of UN*

S'not true at all bout Singapore

bumemr 'cuz names like that can stick and be hard to flick away?

but uh....

I think it would have been good to respond with: "we may be a little booger Island Mr PM, but we are an economic horse turd!"

sigh. some of the worst things i've ever said have been in your comment section dave/judy. yet, i feel oddly at home. hm.

Rhea...brilliant!

I am offended that they take offense.

Way to go Dave! Good to know you have World Leaders (well, minor booger-sized country leaders, anyway) among your alert readers. Maybe we can get him on the blog. First MOATarita's on me.

Hmmh! You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't wipe your friends on your shirt front.

"Taiwan views China as part of its territory awaiting reunification -- wiping Beijing on its shirt front if necessary -- despite their split in 1949 after a civil war."

Do they really do have boogers the size of Singapore in Taiwan? Or is this guy just embracing our balls?

As someone living in the alleged boogerland, I think the Taiwanese Foreign Minister meant "boogieland" -- many are the retro nights in Singapore clubs these days. Or perhaps "Bugisland" (formerly a seedy tourist spot), or "bohgeyland" (Hokkien for "toothless"). Them's fightin' words.

Sometimes even honorable foreign minister speeched bad englishe. Don't blame it on sunshine, don't blame it on moonlight, don't blame it on good times...

Tactical assault boogers. That's what we need!

I just want to say thanks. This article made my day.

*leaves to go flick a Singapore on someone*

It's good to see civility has disappeared from politics in other countries as well.

Bartender! Another boogers 'n balls over here!

You bet boogers'n balls are very catchy, Bangi. However, I have an unguent for it if you're infected, or even if you're not, because that's the nature of unguent having.

I really like this as an international diplomacy tactic. I mean, you call someone part of an axis of evil and, sure, they're insulted, they're a bit miffed, but chances are they are evil, and in the dark of night they have to admit it, after brushing their teeth and just before hopping in the sack to disappoint their lovers.

But when a world leader calls you a booger, or better yet, your whole country a booger, well, that's gonna get under your skin, and fester. The UN would be so much more effective if the members had the guts to simply say "Who cares what you think, you respresent a booger country!"

Then you'd have to go home, to your capital Snotslvania, and convince your constituents that you had made great progress in improving the international image of Mucusovia, and that with another term you could move this country up to, say, a puddle of phlegm.

This is too funny. My seven year-old asked me just this morning why we have boogers. I could have saved a lot of time by pointing to a map and showing him Singapore. We have boogers to keep continental perspective and international relations from blowing out of proportion.
I mean, if Singapore consnotuents can understand the context, my seven year-old can right?

At UN Security Council meeting (in progress)

Secretary Annan: Now, turning to resolution S-2004-013, you have all read the summary of the Subcouncil on Pejorative Implicit Terms (SPIT) on this matter. To summarize, the SPIT recommends that an apology for the remarks is insufficient redress for the insult done to the nation of Singapore, and that a duel be conducted between Minister Yeo of Singapore and Minister Chen of Taiwan. At this time, I would ask you to please register your positions on this recommendation.

Chile: Si
China: Missionary
France: En garde!
Germany: Can we watch?
Pakistan: Woo-hoo!
Philippines: Defensive Tackle
Romania: Run! Run!
Russian Federation: Da
Spain: Yea, but only if we can host it
United Kingdom: Whatever W says
United States: Twenty bucks says Taiwan takes it
Algeria: Will lunch be provided?
Angola: As long as it’s not Thursday; my babysitter’s unavailable Thursday
Benin: Zzzzzzzzzz……
Brazil: Booger!

BOOGER (hollow)!

I'm proud to be an American, where we actually have a sense of humor.

I could tell you what it's supposed to sound like in Taiwanese dialect. It's much more vulgar except probably no one will understand it.

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