THOSE TERRORIST BASTARDS
Now they're using hippos.
(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)
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August 04, 2004
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Are hippos dangerous?
Posted by: Jess S | August 04, 2004 at 06:02 AM
I think they were actually drinking vodka and playing Hungry Hungry Hippos and it just got our of hand.
Posted by: Lou Bricant | August 04, 2004 at 06:03 AM
Their terror at the hippos quietly eating grass might have something to do with them "quietly sharing a vodka..."
Posted by: Bella | August 04, 2004 at 06:03 AM
Their terror at the hippos quietly eating grass might have something to do with them "quietly sharing a vodka..."
Posted by: Bella | August 04, 2004 at 06:04 AM
I could just imagine the conversation between those two fishermen and the first people they tried to tell...
Fishermen "I swear, it was a HIPPO"
Townsperson "We're in freaking SIBERIA, you idjit. Quit drinking that cheap vodka, it'll kill you."
Posted by: Higgy | August 04, 2004 at 06:06 AM
Jess- are hippos dangerous? They weigh like, a ton. They don't have to bite you or claw at you.. they just have to not notice you and you don't get the hell out of the way fast enough. So, yes I'd say they're dangerous if you don't move very quickly.
Posted by: Dave (not Barry.. calm down) | August 04, 2004 at 06:07 AM
I guess, Dave... It's just hard to imagine a hippo inspiring terror. Caution maybe... but not terror.
Posted by: Jess S | August 04, 2004 at 06:10 AM
Hippos are said to be very dangerous, actually attacking and killing and all sorts of things one would not expect giant bulbous beasties to be capable of doing. But those are generally sober hippos, not drunk ones.
Posted by: waxwing | August 04, 2004 at 06:12 AM
Hippos are especially dangerous if they are pachyng heat.
Posted by: LabSpecimen | August 04, 2004 at 06:16 AM
This sounds like a Gary Larson Far Side comic.
Russian villager - "Rampaging hippos, really? Looks like they're placidly grazing to me. How much vodka did you nimskis have out there?"
Posted by: MOTW | August 04, 2004 at 06:22 AM
This sounds like a Gary Larson Far Side comic.
Russian villager - "Rampaging hippos, really? Looks like they're placidly grazing to me. How much vodka did you nimskis have out there?"
Posted by: MOTW | August 04, 2004 at 06:24 AM
Stray hippos run loose in Siberia
Cause vodka induced hysteria
What's one to do?
Run to the zoo!
And bring back some caviar, willi-ya?
Posted by: slowlayne | August 04, 2004 at 06:34 AM
Slowlayne:
"willi-ya"
Hee hee
Posted by: Polly | August 04, 2004 at 06:42 AM
All I could figure was that they were male hippos and ended up in Siberia because they wouldn't ask for directions. (And yes, I thought THE FAR SIDE too.)
"Fred, are you sure this is right? I'm sure we passed that polar bear before."
"Relax, I'm sure if we keep going this way we'll hit the river in no time."
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | August 04, 2004 at 06:44 AM
I actually witnessed a hippo's propeller tail crap explosion at the Nat'l Zoo. The hippo tottered down to the water and stood ass-deep in it to create the full effect. We all stood with our mouths agape (dangerous, yes).
Posted by: Leetie | August 04, 2004 at 06:49 AM
Wow Lily... that was very informative! The idea of a dung shower provides a funny visual...
Posted by: Jess S | August 04, 2004 at 06:53 AM
Siberian fishing is a hoot
'Til animals treat you like doot
When hippos attack
Never fight back
Just flee with your trusty Absolut!
Posted by: mbgordon81 | August 04, 2004 at 07:02 AM
"Yeah, but you should have seen the one that got away!"
Big fish story, indeed.
I saw a family of 5 get completely covered with Hippo sh$# at the Cincinnati zoo. Good times.
Posted by: Christobol | August 04, 2004 at 07:17 AM
lol!
Posted by: Leetie | August 04, 2004 at 07:19 AM
I think we can all agree that Hippos are not native to Russia.
Vodka is.
Enough said.
Posted by: kibby F5 | August 04, 2004 at 08:22 AM
Didn't someone's sister get bitten by a hippo once?
Posted by: bbxl | August 04, 2004 at 09:01 AM
How the heck did those things escape from the zoo in the first place?
Posted by: shauna | August 04, 2004 at 09:05 AM
Mynd you, hypp0 bites Kan be pretty nasti ...
Posted by: LabSpecimen | August 04, 2004 at 09:06 AM
I heard somewhere that the hippos donned disguises to aid in their escape. No, really.
Posted by: LabSpecimen | August 04, 2004 at 09:08 AM
Hippos on the grass, alas. . .
Posted by: Pilsenerman | August 04, 2004 at 09:41 AM
what color hippos? there are those pink ones.........
Posted by: queensbee | August 04, 2004 at 09:45 AM
Siberian fish-
ermen, run away from the
hippopotami!
Posted by: Blogchik | August 04, 2004 at 09:47 AM
kibby's sister got bitten by a moose. Moose bites can be nasty.
Posted by: MOTW | August 04, 2004 at 10:01 AM
I thought that was a llama?
Those responsible for sacking those who failed to sack those who were to be sacked have been sacked.
The rest of the blog has been completed at great expense.
Posted by: Christobol | August 04, 2004 at 10:33 AM
Has anybody ever seen footage of hippos mating underwater. Apparently that's where they do it cause they're too fat and can't support their weight otherwise. It's very disturbing.
Tip: When kayaking, avoid drunken, mating, frolicking hippos. Also don't shoot a hippo with anything smaller than a tactical nuke, you'll just piss them off.
Posted by: pianer | August 04, 2004 at 04:37 PM