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August 18, 2004

OLYMPICS UPDATE

Things are going fine here. The Greeks are wonderful. Also, there is beer. I'll keep you posted. Not!

Hey, remember when everybody said "Not!"? When was that? Like 1991? Does anybody say "Not!" any more?

This has been your Olympics Update. We now return you to judi.

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Hurricane first. Beer, beer, beer. Wonderful BEER.

I remember "Not" it came about whene I was in summer school(following 7th. grade). I was usually a the receving end of it.

da. Don't go to the mountain when they olympic ski. Hard to beef up there. Da. If you see wang don't look. Da. Remember John Wayne is weally Javkie Chan. Ha. Ha.

Charley

Mr. barry,

In response to your complaint regarding your intellimouse, please try plugging the dazmn thing in to right eye.

Guess what! I really did get a date with Lindsay Lohan! NOT! HA HA HA!

I use "NOT!" I also use "PSYCHE!" and this old chestnut: "Thats Fresh!"

"NOT" as a slang term came about during the 80's. Courtesy (as far as I can tell) goes to a NYC heavy metal band called "Anthrax" (www.anthrax.com), who had a mockup mascot called "Not Man". The band used the term "NOT!" as a "PSYCHE-like" term this way as early as their 1987 release "I'm the Man!", a rap song released as a joke.

As a kid who grew up in the 80's & early 90's (the lowest cultural point *EVER* on the planet), the "heavy metal" crowd used "NOT!" as a regular term all the time. It became "mainstream" in the 90's by word of mouth, I suppose.

That's the history as I remember it, but what do I know. I grew up in rural northeastern Pennsylvania.

Has the beer in Greece actually gotten better? I was there in the early 80's and found it undrinkable compared to British, German and most particularly Belgain (yum!) beers.

These days, people say, "Not so much," as in "I'm in Greece. Beer, they have. Toilet paper? Not so much."

Was the "Not!" in reference to the entire first paragraph or just to the "I'll keep you posted".

This could be a cry for help...

karl - "Not!" became mainstream when it became a regular part of the Wayne's World sketches on Saturday Night Live (late 80's - early 90's). Whether it begat the Anthrax usage or the other way around is not for me to say, but Mike Myers and Dana Carvey definitely took it to the rest of the world.

Will you all please be quiet and let Dave get back to the vitally important task of reporting on the Official Olympic Games Swimsuit Competition. Is that Andrea hot, or what? (Did "or what" get used back in the days of "not," or what?)

Well, that was a very edifying post, Dave. Not!

Uh oh - now my language skills are regressing...

Fo'shizzle...
Whatever...
Talk to the hand....
Not....
Dude....
Totally tubular....
Grody to the max...
and so on and so forth...

Hey Dave, you can probably see the hit film I, Robot in Greece . . .

will you be needing a limo, mr. barry?

The pedigree of the word "not"
Requires a great deal of thought
Was it Wayne's syntax?
Or maybe Anthrax?
In the end though, who gives a shot?

Not any more.

Dy-no-mite!

Yep, Carl nailed it. As a kid growing up in the 80's, I can assure you I listened to Anthrax, and my 7th grade yearbook still has "Anthrax" written all over it (as well as "Not!") from all the classmates that signed it.
Quite a few people wrote "Whitesnake" in there, too.
Ah, the 80's.

Doug: Lindsey Lohan? Isn't she like 14 or something?

Topics Dave likes to cover a lot
Include spiders, boogers and snot
Now sitting with Greeks
He's thinking like geeks
and getting more serious. Not!

These days, it's "My bad", which translated means, "My mistake."

My son says "Wait! Wait, just a minute! Hold on" so much that my husband and I have started responding to him the same way whenever he asks us for something. Son doesn't think it's nearly as amusing as we do ...

Whatever...

What the heck time is it in Athens?!?

OMG Punky! During the school year I have to ride the bus with a bunch of school kids and every other word out of the girls' mouths is 'Like'. I'm homicidal by the time I get to work.

MOTW, I don't think it's "my bad" anymore. We started making fun of people who said that when I was a senior in high school, which was 7 years ago. I don't know what "it" is now, because I joined the workforce and lost any coolness that I ever had. "Cool," however, is and always will be, cool.

Refer to Winnebago man for any wonderful slang terms..I think he covers most of them! Actually today lots of people say "Sweet" either sarcastically as to mean "Not" as in.."Do you like my new shoes?"..."uh,yeah..sweet(not)" or as actually cool like "This is sooo cool and by cool I mean TOTALLY SWEET!"...What hapenned to "As if?"

I never did understand what the heck "talk to the hand" is supposed to mean, unless you're using a sock puppet. The things kids say today (or for the past 25 years) make absolutely no sense at all. You can bet your sweet bippy MY generation never said weird stuff like that.

Come on and get on the trolley, people! You need to get up to date on all the latest terms and slangisms if you want to stay hip and with it.

Kids today are all about being groovy and radical. Follow their example, and soon you too will be the bee's knees!

See? punky's jiggy with it.

What I don't get is how words are used now to convey the opposite meaning of the actual word's definition.

For example:
ridiculous (awesome)
bad (good)
wicked (neat-o)

So you end up with sentences like "So I was, like, on my way to a wicked party and this totally bad outfit started riding up. So I, like, ended up with a miniskirt. It was totally ridiculous."

Oh well, at least it's still in English, as opposed to "Soma' my homeys and me was cruisin' to a wiggity-whack hoedown and my threads (which were the hizzle shizzle)..." etc.

Oh vey.

For the latest slang, I like to tune into Ricki Lake and/or Jerry Springer. Those audiences are always on the cutting edge.

Boo - can you even hear what they're saying? Isn't something like 97.3% of the conversation beeped out?

Thanks, people, for making me feel even older than I am. Every generation thinks their parents are totally, like, square (as an earlier generation said) and their kids are incomprehensible. What did we say -- not necessarily me, in all cases, you understand, but my generation -- back in the ancient days:

Cool (the one word that has survived down through the ages)
Far Out
Groovy
Dig It
Hip (as in "I'm Hip" as "I understand")
Peace
Right On

I'll leave it to other ancient peoples to add to this list.

"Greek beer, NOT!" anagrams to "green bot reek".

I just sayin'...

That's what THEY want you to think. In reality the beeps are a sophisticated form of language that they're using to plot their takeover of Earth with their deadly hubcaps and cars on blocks. The last thing you will ever hear will be "Look out! He's got a chair!" And then it will be too late.

A guy here at work told me I was phat. I told him that I was trying to quit smoking and a slight weight gain was only to be expected and then I cried. He spent quite a long time trying to explain phat to me but I still don't understand.

Uh,nobody says radical anymore..Dude is used all the time and AWESOME! (overused)
Oh one of my faves: SOLID!

And for anyone not wanting to register to the Herald, here is Dave's latest column, meant to prove to his employers and the IRS that he's actually working over there.

Peri - in Canada, Budweiser ads are from the "Budweiser Institute" - a men helping men organization. One of the ads was cards for your special woman, and one of the cards said "I meant phat with a ph, like the kids say." Unfortunately, the cards are no longer available on the website (yes, you could actually order these) but they have these, which are totally bitchin'.

Punky:You go girl! (another dumb term)
When we encounter idiots trying to be hip often we say they are talking in "Springer-Speak"..you know the whole talk to the hand-you go girl crowd.

Fed Duck - Thanks. I'll have fun telling my 8th grader that she's, like, totally with it. (NOT!)

Ah yes the great wide world of slang.
I had a good friend in the late 80's who decided to make up his own slang word to see if it would catch on. He took "totally" and "gnarly" and put them together to make "to-nar" and where I lived it was indeed the thing to say for about a year. Of course about 10 of us used it as often as possible in every social setting we could to try and spread it around!

From what I understand the newest thing to say is:

"Iygcluigffgx" - which roughly translates to: “I've got more money, jewelry, cars, houses, planes, champagne and promiscuous women than any other uneducated man in front of this here video camera right now. And because of that I should be given the respect normally reserved for gods and hero’s. If you don’t like it, don’t worry, it’s actually all rented and I’ll be broke and in jail or dead in 6 months anyhow!”

I may have misinterpreted a few of the nuances but I believe that covers the majority of what it means.

Rachel, those are hilarious!!!

I worked as a retail marketer for Hallmark for 6 years. I was supposed to take the Valentine's cards down right away when the store opened on the 15th. At noon I would have guys coming in to buy cards 'cause they forgot.

The conversations would go something like this.

"Do you really think a card is going to cover you for this?"

"Um, well, I dunno. Won't it?"

"No way. You blew it big time and you know it."

"Well... um... yeah. She was pretty mad. I mean' at first she was just real quiet and I was just enjoying how she wasn't all yakkin' and I could watch the game, yah know?"

"Oh really?"

"Well yeah. After a while when she didn't say anything even during the commercials, I started to think something was wrong."

"Hmmm?"

"But when she just sat there and looked at me when I asked her to get me a beer at half-time, well then I knew."

"How long did it take you to find out why she was mad?"

"Well, that's the thing. She wouldn't tell me. She just said I should know."

"How long?"

"Um. Well. She finally told me about midnight. If she would have just said right away, we could a gone somewhere. It's not like I got to watch the rest of the game anyway."

"So, she had to tell you because you never remembered it was Valentine's Day?"

"Uh, yeah that's about it. Why couldn't she just tell me?"

"Because if you cared you would have remembered."

"That's exactly what she said!"

"That's what we all say."

"Well that's just crazy. I care about her. I just didn't remember about a stupid holiday."

"You remembered about the game. Right?"

"Yeah, but that's different."

"Not to her. You need to be thinking jewelry. . . expensive jewelry, dinner at a nice restaurant . . . and flowers. . . every day for a week."

"You're kidding."

"Nope. And don't forget again."

"I won't. I can't afford too."

"Exactly. Good luck."

"Yeah, thanks."

Yo nizzles are da bomb. Fo shizzle.

DA BOOGERS DA BOMB... OUT!!

faves I've heard:

trippin' (stoned or really upset or amazed or shocked)
jeet? (did you eat yet)
flippy real flippy (cool - taken from Jailhouse Rock)

i believe kids today say "sick" now instead of rad, far out, cool, the cats pijamas, and the like

In my neighborhood (plaza del coolio) the translations are roughly thus:

Cool = Blood in his stool
He ain't just sick, yo he's got blood in his stool
*can substitute "got chunks of leprosy falling into his soup, yo" as needed*

Bling-Bling = Ratnipples
Check it yo, bounce this ride ta da hizzle so I can throw some ratnipples on for the dope picnic we bustin.

Trippin' = Passing a stone
Dag homey I rapped wit da units that I'd be riding late and they passed a stone, yo

Phat = Unbearably ugly to the point that I have gouged my eyes out with a piece of igneous rock that I like to carry around with me in my pocket, or else in my sock when I don't have a pocket. Just kidding don't hit me I mean really really really pretty.
*this one is difficult to use in conversation, and generally results in death, which makes it the coolest of all*

Some recommendations from the resident 14-year-old male...

"sweetness"- that's great
"gay"- stupid
"i'm trippin'"- i'm being a dumbass

No one says "sick" anymore. At least not around here.

Yes, it's lovely to see the language of our youth erode further.

Shanizzle indeed.

:-)

I say we reintroduce "booger" into the language in honor of Dave. Go up to someone in your office and say, "Yo, that tie is totally booger!" When he looks at you strangely and asks what that means, snort derisively as if he's the most uncool person ever for not knowing what you meant, and walk away. This will give the word that cool mystique and it will spread faster.

As I was chaparoning a middle school dance, I heard a song with a catchy tune that I was sure was a remix of an old song that I had heard in my youth. I was pretty sure that the word *incarceration* was not in the original song, and curious about the rest of the unintelligable lyrics, I found it in my daughter's Kazaa file the next day and listened to it over and over to try to figure out what he was saying.

One part really had me puzzled. I was just sure he was saying "Closer than my Peeps you are to me," and I thought, "I know the average middle school girl is has the I.Q. of a box of Jello, but PEEPS. I mean, since when is being favorably compared to a sugar coated marshmallow Easter chicken by an ex-con with an apparently serious sugar habit, a good thing?"

Later, my daughter cleared it all up by telling me "Oh yeah, Mom peeps is short for people as in your Homeys." Blank stare. "Uh, your Posse?"

"Well that would explain the incarceration. But I didn't know people felt close to their Posse's."

"He's talking about his friends and family. You know what they are, don't ya Mom."

"Oh, yeah, whatever."

"Word."


*The word is Stupid if you ask me.*

For real, dawg. No doubt.

Two that piss me off:

"in the house"

and

"you know what I'm sayin'?"

Peace Out

I use Not! all the time along with rad and stay cool.

So everybody knows, I have been on a crusade to bring back "tubular" "cowabunga" for about the last 6 years. You're welcome.

a guy i dated once like to use "fade to black" a lot. as in "dude, just fade to black, man"

Did you tell him you prefer to spiral-wipe to a sort of midnight blue shade?

Not.

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