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July 19, 2004

THE RULES: HERE WE GO AGAIN

OK, this would solve the problem, but ... is it worth it?

(Thanks to Cristy Wade)

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First

First? Something fishy here?

Hey, I could have used that driving into work this morning. It's tough when you work out in the morning, drink a bunch of water and two cups of coffee, and then drive into work...

The best quote is FAQ #7:

Can females write their name in the snow with the TravelMate? Yes.

This question is really asked frequently?

I think the important feature is that it floats.

I'm glad there's products for everyone out there, even the urinary disfunctioned. It shows our creativity.
We might not have to wait so long yet before our cars are powered by poo.

Now females can (more easily) experience the one thing that has set males apart since Adam and Eve - writing your name in the snow.

With all the places they list that TravelMate has been, I just have to wonder if they leave some sort of GPS tag on it so they can track who has it and where it goes (and thus, where the owner "goes").

Granny: Pull over, Son, I need to use my TravelMate.

*sound of car pulling onto shoulder. Granny gets out and walks to the back of the station wagon.*

Beep - Beep - Beep - Beep

Granny: What in the world?!

Hal-like voice: Thank you for using TravelMate. You are now in Mineola, Texas just off east-bound highway 80.

Granny: Son! Son!

Son comes running around to Granny.

Granny: Son! I just done peed us on the map!

Hey all my lil blogfiends! I mean friends! I'm back after some technical difficulties and work schedule changes. :)


This travelmate thing looks eerily like something that could be used to artificially insiminate someone.

I'd feel sorry for anyone who had to stop in Mineola. It's not much of anything.

How do you explain THIS one at Customs?

I assume you'd have to demonstrate it.

a “no questions asked” money-back satisfaction guarantee is provided.

operator: Why weren't you satisified?
customer: My boyfriend was jealous because I was bigger... And my handwriting was better...

Hmmm.. our anniversary is coming up. Thanks Judi! What a great gift idea!!

Okay, ew, and
1. You can use it while in an airplane seat? If ANYONE EVER tried to use one of these while sitting next to me, I think I would be scarred for life.
2. They have a "no questions asked" refund policy, but I have a question: what do they do with the returned ones? Do they get resold?
EW!

I think I'd rather take my chances with Iraqi insurgents or frostbite.

Ok, I have to comment on this one... peeing in a sink? While I DEFIANTLY agree that people need to clean up after them selves.. I don't know if I like the ideal of someone peeing in a sink.

Public restrooms are nasty anyways.. I find its best just not to think about it.

Does this thing now absolve a man from eternal damnation for leaving the toilet seat up?

>Women standing up to pee- isn't that one of the signs of the apocalypse?

Elle,

I believe the only true sign of the Apocalypse we have seen in the past 100 years is country music.

JMHO.

Exotica

djtonyb: I might take a leak in the sink - but that other part...that makes you pee on your shoes...how drunk were you?

Is it just me or does that thing bear a suspicious resemblance to the McFlurry spoon?

Martin, now we know what happens to the returned ones...

While I think peeing in the sink is knarly, it's not too bad- unless sometime in the future you're soaking some vegetables or filling it up with ice to keep the beer cold. Things that I rarely do in a public restroom.

TMI brother, T M I

I just don't pierce that area. Less hassle.

djtonyb.... *when you gotta go you gotta go*

The era is 1980's, the venue Reunion Arena, Dallas, Texas. The concert ZZTop. The line to the "ahem" ladies room circled the arena at least twice. The line to the men's room was 0. I had the "interesting pleasure" of witnessing 4 or 5 of the aforementioned ahem's using
1) The urinals
2) The sinks
3) The trash barrels.
They received Standing Applause from all on-lookers. They didn't need any pierciengs or any other type of help, they just "went" and the sighs of relief were uuuuh pronounced?

djtonyb - At first I was annoyed at the thought of anyone using a sink, but then I recalled my days living in a building where residents frequently used the elevator floor as a urinal. I'd have been thankful if they'd used the sink instead. So, thanks for keeping my feet dry! :)

I've seen apartment hallways used before...the consumption of alcohol contributed to that decision, though.

Like DJTony, I too have an erotic piercing - a Prince Albert. The reason one gets it is because it heights the sexual experience for himself and his parnter, male OR female.

The downside, as DJT pointed out, is that it creates a second hole in the head of the penis - thus a second stream of urine. It is usually easier to sit down when pissing to deal with the problem. If one stands at a urinal, one has to stand *realclose* and make sure he doesn't splash all over his shoes. Really.

AND, as DJT mentioned, if one dribbled on the floor, one should clean up after one's self.

Hmm. A She-Wee.

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