IT WAS BOUND TO HAPPEN
(Thanks to Amy Tan)
Update: We have been advised by alert commenters that this item was already blogged. Apparently this means we will have to start actually reading the blog. Dang.
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July 23, 2004
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I'd like to remind the Blog that the Stealth Bloggerette already Blogged this.
Posted by: Tetsu | July 23, 2004 at 05:46 AM
Well, it WAS sent in by Amy Tan...
Posted by: Leetie | July 23, 2004 at 05:53 AM
patron!
put down the straw dispenser and step away from the salad bar!
as an aside, bumping chests IS the customary prelude to all physical fights.
Posted by: nobody | July 23, 2004 at 06:05 AM
Dave, I don't think you really want to read the blog. It wasn't pretty while you were gone.
Posted by: Warning | July 23, 2004 at 06:06 AM
I'd get a kick out of just hearing more restaurant employees address people as "patron".
Posted by: dave | July 23, 2004 at 06:07 AM
Leetie, yeah, but when one of US sends something in, well ... that's a different story. (Amy's a suck-up.)
Posted by: MOTW | July 23, 2004 at 06:09 AM
That's a Whopper of a story.
meh.
I guess that's what happens when two guys have to have it their way.
meh x 2.
Posted by: lurker | July 23, 2004 at 06:15 AM
I guess Amy Tan isn't reading the blog either.
Posted by: bbescuela | July 23, 2004 at 06:15 AM
I wonder if one of the employees said "That was the last straw!"
Posted by: Steve | July 23, 2004 at 06:16 AM
Clearly the one guy was eager to "make dinner" and that slowpoke in the stall kept him waiting.
Posted by: Lairbo | July 23, 2004 at 06:18 AM
Lairbo, as usual, a real zinger of a comment. LOL
New meaning to the slogan "Have it your way!"
Posted by: MOTW | July 23, 2004 at 06:24 AM
I'm LTTG. Sorry lurker.
Posted by: MOTW | July 23, 2004 at 06:26 AM
MOTW: don't worry, Dave is LTTG too and it's his own blog.
Dave, we already discussed the dueling possibilities re straw dispenser vs. knife and whether or not the guy was hitting him with the dispenser on popping out straws one by one, which would be decidedly less effective, especially when the other guy had a knife.
see?
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | July 23, 2004 at 06:36 AM
Great tie-in Lairbo.
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | July 23, 2004 at 06:37 AM
No indication on whether either party washed their hands.
Posted by: Chaz Stevens | July 23, 2004 at 06:55 AM
Or if they left money on the urinal...
Exotica
Posted by: Exotica | July 23, 2004 at 06:58 AM
I am just curious if that was the Amy Tan (leather-clad vixen of the RBR) that submitted the link. If so, perhaps the stealth bloggerette felt pressure to repost the same link. Talk about pressure. Especially after missing the Algona breaking news the other day...
Posted by: Drew | July 23, 2004 at 07:02 AM
But Drew - it was the stealth bloggerette who posted it first, and as Jeff Meyerson so astutely observed it is Dave himself (blogmeister) who reposted it. (LTTG)
Posted by: MOTW | July 23, 2004 at 07:06 AM
MOTW
I guess I should actually read the blog.
Posted by: Drew | July 23, 2004 at 07:09 AM
"Ain't that just like a [insert relevent ethnic slur here] - brings a straw dispenser to a knife fight"
Posted by: Moe | July 23, 2004 at 07:14 AM
Ah, re-runs...proof that summer has finally arrived.
Posted by: iolite | July 23, 2004 at 08:09 AM
reruns - isn't that what you get after consuming renally rehydrated rations?
Posted by: markhh | July 23, 2004 at 08:19 AM
Renally Rehydrated wbagnfarb
Posted by: MOTW | July 23, 2004 at 08:22 AM
Markhh - Thankfully, I can honestly say, I don't know. And I don't really want to. :)
Posted by: iolite | July 23, 2004 at 08:31 AM
You mean *sniff* that Dave doesn't actually read this blog?
And here I thought he kept a scrapbook of all his favorite comments.
*sniff, sniff*
Posted by: Lily | July 23, 2004 at 08:41 AM
Um, sure I do!
Posted by: Dave Barry | July 23, 2004 at 08:58 AM
I'm just waiting for the Steve King movie version of this.
Posted by: BarryFS | July 23, 2004 at 09:11 AM
You mean Amy Tan doesn't read the blog??!!
Posted by: Bassman | July 23, 2004 at 09:23 AM
Steven King version.
*waves hand wildly in the air*
Oooh, oooh.
I know. I know.
A mad fanbloggeret kidnaps Dave after an unfortunate car accident and holds him hostage, forcing him to continuously read his own blog.
She chops off his fingers one by one if he refuses to type hilarious replies to the lame, amature posts provided by the public.
Finally, after being run over with a power lawnmower, he escapes to carry on his career with only his remaining digits and his nightmares.
I have a power lawnmower;)
Posted by: Lily | July 23, 2004 at 09:32 AM
No Stephen King version of the evil straw dispenser that attacks innocent patrons in the restroom. Straws can be lethal in about 20 different ways....
That could provide about 4 novels worth...
Posted by: MadScientist | July 23, 2004 at 10:21 AM
The mad flanbloggeret(te) would also be wearing a clown outfit...
oh man, just creeped myself out there with a Pennywise flashback.
Posted by: lurker | July 23, 2004 at 10:21 AM
Well, since I got to see it again, I'd like to point out that Toilet Fighters wbagnfarb. The first single could be "Poo Power."
One of these days, this blog will help someone start a music career.
Posted by: Alex | July 23, 2004 at 10:29 AM
i guess this means dave, that you really didnt read all of our bon mots about 'the last straw,
etc, the first time. it is a funny article anyway. boohoo.
weapons of straw destruction wbagnfarb
Posted by: queensbee | July 23, 2004 at 10:47 AM
alex: flanbloggeret(te)
Write her comments in custard. no doubt.
And Comments in Custard WBA great NFA band in the genre of "simply red" and "everything but the girl".
Posted by: markhh | July 23, 2004 at 10:56 AM
Mad is right: I bet his mother told him "you'll shoot your eye out" like Ralphie's mom did.
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | July 23, 2004 at 12:45 PM
She must have, otherwise he would have had his Red Rider B.B. Gun with lever action and he wouldn't have to resort to straws at twenty paces.
Posted by: Lily | July 23, 2004 at 01:00 PM
this reminds of my own run in with potty rage. it was a little different in that I was alone and my rage was really directed at myself. i'm not comfortable discussing the details but let me just tell you...well...no...i don't want to tell you anything right now. thx.
Posted by: jason | July 23, 2004 at 02:40 PM
My only question is did the other guy go to the bathroom before the fight started or did he have an accident?
Posted by: Richard the Great | July 24, 2004 at 06:25 AM