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July 20, 2004


Be on the lookout for someone trying to fence some stolen rocks.

(Thanks to Julie Davis and George Viconovic)


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And when the thief is caught, he'll be sent to (you guessed it) 'The Rock'.

"Authorities said they do not think the two cases are connected and are having a hard time solving both cases."

Two cases of rock theft, two months apart, in the same North Carolina town - and they don't think they're connected. Maybe some outside investigators should look for the rocks in the "authorities"' heads!

(And thank God for another topic, finally!)

How do you *not* notice someone carrying off your 4,000 pound rock?

"The two-ton rock had sat beside the busy intersection for 38 years."

Yes, RPD, and from a "busy intersection"?

Why can't they solve the 4000 lb rock theft? Where do you conceal a 2 ton rock? What sort of getaway vehicle did they use? How did they lift it onto the vehicle? Has someone in town opened a new quarry recently? I think this police force are the Keystone Kops.

Obviously we need a massive government program to etch serial numbers into all landscaping rocks nationwide for cross-referencing in a computerized database. ("#264578SD -- pinkish with white flecks, 250 pounds, flat on two sides.")

You might argue that someone might chip the serial number off, rendering the system useless. But mere practical matters never stopped the bureaucrats before.

"The police are having a hard time..." Yes, between a rock and a hard place I would say.

Damn - now I'm going to have to bring my 4,000 lb rocks at night to keep them safe....

Just when you thought you could leave them overnight for 38 years or so...


Are there any missing giant pices of paper or giant scissors?

Prime suspects

Maybe, just maybe, the rocks left on their own, what with all that pollution at a busy intersection and all. consider that maybe?

i'd say the investigators have hit rock bottom...
*ducks stones*

I've gotten sentimentally attached to things, but a rock?

Personally, I think this guy is the prime suspect.

What? No "before" pic to go with the "after" shot?

How the hell are we gonna know what the rock LOOKS like? Does it have any identifiable markings or anything?

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