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June 23, 2004

SPECKLES THE LATE CHICKEN UPDATE

We thought we were done with this story (summarized here and here). However, we have received an email from Kathy Dean, whose husband was arrested for allegedly kidnapping Speckles; she feels that the stories linked to in this blog did not tell the whole story, and she wants people to know her husband's side, which is presented here.

This blog wants to state for the record that it has NO idea what happened and is hoping that, in time, all of this will just go away. Thank you.

Comments

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Oh, what the hell... First!

Gross.

Goodness... I can't open them because I'm at work, but she posted pictures of her husband partially nude ON THE INTERNET? Does she not like him?

That is one of the most confusing web sites I've ever seen. We get to see images of documents, but where's the text of her side of the story? If she's really making a stand, she ought to have a summary of the whole thing easily findable. As it is all I can see is that she's saying the police were wrong ...

This is old but still juicy.

Free the Speckles One!

OK, I almost couldn't stomach this after scrolling past her husband's hairy @$$, but then seeing the broken diseased toenail sent me to pukesville.

Could someone post a one paragraph summary of what the hell is going on here so we don't have to see her picture story?? Yuck.

Poor use of color. Bad production values. Totally lacking in the Aristotelian arts.

after trying to figure out what or whom she was defending, i clicked off. i dont CARE what her side of the story is. Poor, dead Speckles. sob. delicious. whoops.

Whoo hoo...dig that adult content

Waste of electrons.

Does anybody else not see ANY "trauma" from handcuffs or otherwise? I mean... well...

whatever.

This has always been MY favorite Speckles piece. Why can't we get a great investigative journalist like John in New York?

And for latecomers, here is the way the blog saw it when Speckles' killer was brought to justice.

OK Bryce, I took the bait.

Now, really, PURPLE speedos?

And on Friday the 13th?

What!? You were making a fashion statement AND hoping for something BAD to happen?

I'm happy to say AOL decided it had to protect me from Kathy Lynn and her husband's hairy butt, so I guess I'll live without seeing it.

who are all of these people who still OWN speedos? Haven't we passed a law yet? It's just wrong!

Because I was wearing the Speedo for a good cause, a local sporting goods store donated it. The only one they had in the winter that was even close to my size was purple. That really sucked. But I must point out that while it was a few sizes too big, I did fill it out. Notice the sled wasn't really a sled but a trash can lid. I would reccomend that anyone who wishes to sled down a giant snow pile in a speedo should be wary of sharp edges and not use trash can lids. It left marks.

Bryce, maybe Kathy will photograph your injuries and put it on her website at about page 17...

Thank you, Bryce, for creating a diversion to distract me from the trauma caused by Kathy's husband's bare butt cheek.

It looks like Kathy is a few bricks short of a full load. And why won't someone arrest her for that awful website? It's a crime against humanity.

djyontyb -

-that's the exact same outfit I was planning on wearing to the DC bloglit invasion. Are you coming? If so, are you wearing the outfit too? Must be unique.

Bryce Said: "But I must point out that while it was a few sizes too big, I did fill it out.

I suspect the giant Chee-to was in use here.

Gombos was charged with third-degree theft and interfering with an officer after he allegedly balked at giving the bird to the deputies.

Usually they don't like it when you give them the bird (trust me).

Bryce, if you read my other post you'd have known that the one hard and fast rule in competitive eating is NO BARFING!

Jeff, I agree, but it wasn't competitive eating. I guess one could say it was me against the weiners, but the idea was to eat as many as I possibly could to raise money. If I hadn't barfed I wouldn't have truly given it my all.

Bryce, was it anything like the pie scene in STAND BY ME? That would have been very cool. I don't suppose you have a picture of... nah, never mind.

Hey Dave,

I just talked to my grandfather in Grants Pass, Oregon. He is a respected member of the community up there and thinks we could get a permit for a chicken parade in this guy's honor. Would you or Judi be willing to be the grand marshal? We could put you up in a nice home right on the Rogue River (ok, maybe the kitchen isn't the poster room for Good Housekeeping). What do you think? Weather is great in August.

I volunteer judi for that honor.

Would "Nick's Buttock Trauma," or just "Buttock Trauma" BAGNFARB?

Bryce, let me just say, you are the first person I've ever seen make a pair of Speedos look good. Rockin' bod, babe!

The two picture captioned "Buttock Trauma" just crack me up.

Would that BAGNFARB? I think it would most likely suit an "alternative" sorta RB.

JT: Wow that was weird. I scanned the comments twice to make sure I wasn't double posting something someone had already written. Should have hit refresh one more time I suppose...

Drew, it just goes to show that great, or at least strange, minds think alike...

Bryce: "Me Against the Weiners" WBAGNFARB and/or album.

JT: I'll assume the latter.

Since when did flea bites become "ankle trauma"?

DJ, I'm shocked - shocked - that you claim not to have any pictures of this event.

God, couldn't he have shaved his ass before he let it be photographed? Has he no mercy?

Oh Judi..There is a hot male bum on this link. Did you look? I bet you did!!

Damn, all I get is still You Are Not Authorized to See This Page.

Is this guy's hairy butt that bad?

I agree that Buttock Trauma wbagnfarb.

And tell the truth, have you ever asked yourself this question?

Obviously Buttock Augmentation would also bagnfarb.

It was the butt that should have been named Speckles.
I'm sure, however, it furthers Nick's desire to be taken seriously as a chicken defender that his darling spouse posted pictures of his butt all over the internet. Perhaps this is a new ACLU requirement... you have to literally show your ass to be a client.
Bleh

i think in many there's a little bit of speckles in all of us. but in other ways, there's not. in the end, the story of speckles is really a story of confusion. a fog bank on the beach of our lives moving forward. did i really just say that? dave, i demand you delete my comment. if we were ever friends at all you will do so.

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