IMPORTANT CAMPAIGN ENDORSEMENT
In a move certain to rock the political world, the Pirate Guys (Cap'n
Slappy - left in photo - and Ol' Chumbucket) endorsed the heaving juggernaut that is the Dave Barry for President campaign.
"Dave is a close personal friend," said the captain, later admitting he never actually met the man, "so endorsing his presidential ambition was just sort of natural for us. We can't think of anyone who stands more forthrightly for the most important issues of the day - namely a belief in the deliciousness of beer."
Seeking to dispel the rumor that the coveted endorsement of the two had been "bought and paid for," as some of the "weasels" in Washington's press corps have reported, Ol' Chumbucket said, "Absolutely not. No money has changed hands. We haven't even changed our clothes. We support Dave because - well, he's Dave. And if we get an ambassadorship out of this, perhaps to some region vital to American interests, say, the Bahamas or any other warm, sunny place, well, that's totally unrelated to our endorsement."
(Thanks to Ted Habte-Gabr, the throbbing surging campaign juggernaut Field Coordinator)